Dear Romeo

Dear Romeo

A Poem by Arctic Fox
"

What I am facing.

"

Romeo, Romeo I know how you felt.

I hold the same hand that to you life dealt.

 

I knew we were like you two.

I don’t know if it will end too.

 

No it is over, we still have time.

The clock has not yet reached the last chime.

 

I will wait in out my time in this exile.

I’ll let her take her time with her trial.

 

Tell me how to cope if things end bad.

What will happen if another takes what I had?

 

I’ll pray to God that things come together.

If it doesn't it will be good bye to you all , forever.

© 2010 Arctic Fox


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I love the Romeo&Juliet reference! Putting yourself in Romeo's shoes and asking for advice reveals that you have something going on in your life (that I don't know about), but this poem really opens up how you're feeling, and I believe that emotion. However, in the second stanza, you refer to the bad ending and how it happened, but you contradict yourself in the following paragraph by saying it hasn't happened yet. Maybe change the lines to "I see we are on the same path, too/But it hasn't happened yet, we still have time" or something like that. Again, great poem, the emotion is really strong and I believe you. Good job :)

Posted 13 Years Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.




Reviews

The flow in the first stanza is great but then in the second... it really dies, no offense, but it picks up again in the third. Also in the fourth stanza, the first line doesn't make sense "I will wait in out my time" it's the "in out" that's out of place. The very last line of the poem also lacks power for me or a good flow. It could be better if you combined "does" and "not" into "doesn't", might have a better rhythm to it. Just a suggestion. I personally wasn't into this poem, but I don't like Romeo & Juliet based anything so I'm probably prejudice.

Posted 13 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Wow this was well done. It was such an enjoyable read. I think it took a lot of talent to write this honestly and I'm glad that I stopped by to read it. :)

Posted 13 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Well done! I agree, sad and enjoyable. It's funny how the writers here manage that. :)
Powerful write.

Posted 13 Years Ago


A sad romantic poem but enjoyable to read.

Posted 13 Years Ago


I love the Romeo&Juliet reference! Putting yourself in Romeo's shoes and asking for advice reveals that you have something going on in your life (that I don't know about), but this poem really opens up how you're feeling, and I believe that emotion. However, in the second stanza, you refer to the bad ending and how it happened, but you contradict yourself in the following paragraph by saying it hasn't happened yet. Maybe change the lines to "I see we are on the same path, too/But it hasn't happened yet, we still have time" or something like that. Again, great poem, the emotion is really strong and I believe you. Good job :)

Posted 13 Years Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.

Oh, great poem :) I love how you incorporated romeo and Juliet :) the last 2 stanza's are my fav :) x

Posted 13 Years Ago


Nice poem. The flow breaks in the first stanza but after that its perfect. The style is good too. And the content is interesting, you wrote is so it sounds as if it has a hidden story and people are free to imagine what it is. At least that's how i feel reading it.

Posted 13 Years Ago


I am not intending on taking my own life Felicia, but If I lose her for good I will volunteer for every tour overseas I can just to stay out the country.

Posted 13 Years Ago


A modern day situation that thrives on the anxiety, a beautifully moving poem love:)
Love and light to you hon, there is always light in darkness:)
xx

Posted 13 Years Ago


Oh, very tragic-sounding. Then again Romeo and Juliet was a tragedy...I see the theme there ._.

Posted 13 Years Ago



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1088 Views
22 Reviews
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Shelved in 1 Library
Added on June 30, 2010
Last Updated on July 7, 2010
Tags: Romeo, life, death, love, lose, take, a, break, taking

Author

Arctic Fox
Arctic Fox

LA



About
I am the youngest of three. I was born in 1991. I love to read, write, and help others. Want to know more, just ask. I will answer any question no matter what it is with a 100% honest answer. more..

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