ill they said

ill they said

A Poem by AssonanceWriter

I’m the kid in the background that nobody wanted to play with-

I’m the voice that nobody ever even listens to

I wire my story in each therapy sitting

Them Therapists never even cared about me,

Test my patience; I’m quite restraint

But ain’t nobody ever gon’ listen if they ain’t gettin’ paid

So, tell me what I’m doing here?

Look, Just listen.

They say, “Assonance, tell me what you hear?”

Oh, them voice’s aren’t actually the enemy, quit playing, don’t dodge their questions, why tell em’ they ain’t gon’ listen, they’re gonna make me pop them pills and swallow them- and tell me that I’m ill-

Ill they said, ill they said, ill they said

Tch, this life is a dark place and secretly, I build me a cage and hide inside from it

How are you going to tell me that- your sessions are worth 200 dollars when you ain’t doing me nothing.’

Huh?

Look, Just listen.

They say, “Assonance, tell me what you see?”

Oh, them shadows aren’t actually gon’ hurt me, stop lying, don’t avoid their inquiries, why tell em’ they ain’t gon’ listen, they’re gonna make me punch the wall until my fists bleed, they gonna tell me that I’m ill- until they chain my wrists with shackles and force them pills down my throat-

My existence makes them get goosebumps, they said,

Oh shut up, you don’t know me!

Ill they said, ill they said, ill they said

Tch, this life is a dark place, and secretly, it doesn’t even affect my brain, honestly speaking’ what is Normal, is the damn question, can you honestly define this unrealistic definition, is that a human born without fear? Cause I obviously ain't it

Look, Just Listen.

They say, “Assonance, what are the voices telling you to do?”

Oh, them voices aren’t actually the enemy, quit playing, don’t dodge their questions, why tell em’ they ain’t gon’ listen, they’re gonna make me pop them pills and swallow them- and tell me that I’m ill-

Ill they said, ill they said, ill they said

OH SHUT UP, YOU DON’T KNOW ME!

YOU AFRAID OF ME? THEN STAY AFRAID, I AIN’T GON’ HURT YOU- BUT IF MY INVISIBLE SICKNESS IS WHAT MAKES YOU SWAY AWAY THEN- HOW COULD YOU EVEN CALL YOURSELF A HUMAN, OH WAIT- IS THAT WHAT THEIR definition of NORMAL is?

Don't worry bout me, I walk hand in hand with Fear

Not Educated, I still be spitting better WRITES than yours

Don't hate me without reason; you ain't know me, you can't level to my passion

I want you to picture this, an eternal darkness- with no direction,

have you ever been there before?

Have you ever walked the route where there is nothin', but you are still surviving because you tryna' become somthin'

You say that you acknowledge me, but you don't even read my pain

You say that you is proud of me, but you don't even know me

You try to step into my darkness, but it backfires cause you ain't strong enough to break through my cage

I could hear it in your voice, I know that you is trying, but if you really care for me, then why are you laughing?

How could you just leave me, writing is the only place that I could lean to,

All I write is pain, I put my life in these pages, but nobody could hear my sorrow

ill they said,

Sometimes I think that it would be nice if you weren't like them Normals' but you don't know what my eternal darkness is- therefore, I'll pretend to be what they label me on papers,

Ill They said.


©2018 AssonanceWriter







© 2018 AssonanceWriter


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Added on February 18, 2018
Last Updated on February 18, 2018
Tags: AssonanceWriter, Mental Illness, Ill, Anxiety

Author

AssonanceWriter
AssonanceWriter

Saint Paul, MN



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