My STORY|

Lately, I’ve been speaking to God, but it seems as though the Devil is answering to me

Let alone, does my name still appear on Heaven's list

Would heaven cast me out for living the life that I live

Heaven hear my prayers

Was Failure written in my story?

Was suffering a part of it?

I have no direction; I define naive

Friendship, Companionship, Relationships--

I crave for them all

I have never been the BRIDE standing under the matrimony-

Been asked to be a Bridesmaid, but it wasn't complete

They won’t let me make my own decisions,

Sometimes I feel as though my life is scripted,

Lord, did you drop your Holy pen somewhere?

Did the Devil accidentally picked it up and started adding fillers to my story?

I’m alive, but do I deserve to be?

Awaken from a coma, put behind glass doors, an infinite Darkness invites me in

The door shuts as I rock back and forth

Everything that happened, is not vague, but clear to me

That turquoise scrub that was forced on to my body, those Blue Nitrile disposable gloves forcing

Pills down my throat, those same hands inserting a Syringe needle extracting my blood, a plastic cup with a green lid was offered to me, and at last, an unusual flashlight traces over my pupils...

Was that supposed to be a part of My story?

God, I just need to know.

Correct me, direct me, give me a destination.

I made it so far on my own.

Given, I’m with a man who has never believed in you, no.

Was this a top notch mission assigned to me as well, Lord?

I don’t know how to live, rewrite my story, ERASE what hurts me, Delete the fillers, the Detour, the Past, the Nightmares, the TRAUMA

Everything gets heavy the more I try to better understand my story

“Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, and before you were born I anointed you; I established you a prophet to the nations.” Jeremiah 1:5

God, I just need to know.

Tell me how to live through…

These pages… These Chapters…This Story...

MY STORY.