feelings of an introvert

I feel so much

I feel deeply

I have to sit alone

I’m not lonely

Thriving. Thinking. Feeling.

I can’t realize life until I’m alone.

I taste the sea on my lips

I feel the wet on the rim of my eye

I scream to the stagnant air

Humid. Thick.

I whisper my thoughts. Then I understand better.

I cry almost every day. To understand.

I laugh to myself too.

I feel choked and near fainting when I’m too surrounded.

When I have to put on a smile, when I have to

be able to talk to people all the time.

It exhausts me.

I sit in my corner. Rain falls. Deep thoughts. I’m moved.

But then I can’t ever say what I’m thinking as well as I’d like.

How do you translate that divine language of beauty.

I learn more every day. When I see the crouching grass, the old man

Picking out the best birthday card for his wife of long years, the freckles strewn across the bridge of a little nose.

I learn to notice the beauty. I need to be alone.

If I’m not, I will never fully live. I can’t. 

Reviews

[Astro]

Interesting subjective reality you've described here. That precious ability to see more than the average person, but to fully absorb the observation, to exist within it and feel it out, it takes time and an open mind to interpret the random perspectives of the average person. This is not only thought provoking and insightful, it shows the uniqueness and not the 'freakness' of introverts and how they are often misunderstood. Cool write.

[BuffyWillowDawnAngelGil..]

The part about the sea on the lips and wet on the eyes is like "I'm crying but I'm gonna let you figure that out on your own" which I really like.

[AutumnBelle]

thanks again!

[Avinash]

It's a wonderful attempt to feel life in its totality. If you are one with your thoughts, body and mind...I guess you are in perfect company anyone can afford. I love your writing style. Its intense and has multiple layers.

[AutumnBelle]

thanks avinash!