A Man Like Father

I just came up with the title and concept, looking forward to how it turns out. A little girl describing the kind of man she wants to marry. "A man like father." How she sees her father as a husband.

A man like father, would have to be amazing

Tall and handsome and loving and caring

He would have to be funny, and always smiling

Never ever hit me, or leave when I'm crying

He would always make me smile, even when I'm sad

He would be the best cook, and the bestest dad.

but,

A man like father would also make me cry

Because I know he's not happy all the time

He gave up his love just to marry me

Because a baby girl, made us a family

He would try to love me, but never hard enough.

He would break my heart when I thought it was tough.

A man like father would love all our children

and one day love me too.

A man like father would be the best man in the world

so gentle, and so true

Reviews

[Saumya]

A father is her daughter's first and best friend throughout life, and one like your poem tells, is indeed a blessing to have! :) Thank-you so much for sharing your lovely sentiments about this very precious gem of a kid's life , Avia. Your poem's innocence and piousness made me smile :)
Well done!

[Avia]

Thank you so much. It means a lot 💝

[Saumya]

You're most welcome, Avia :)

[Miss Sensuality]

This isn't a story. It's a poem.

[Najam Us Saher]

Having such a father is a blessing, very good words. I liked it.

[Avia]

Thanks Najam 😊

[Najam Us Saher]

You're welcome :)

[emipoemi]

The concept is intriguing, and I very much enjoyed Stanza "2". I merely found the end a tad anticlimactic and with regards to Stanza 1, repeating words (like "smile" and "smiling") undermine the power that they have because of the repetition. So be careful with that. Stanza "2", as mentioned, is great. Loved that. And Stanza "3"....I wasn't feeling it. There seemed to be some contradictory ideas playing throughout the poem, which didn't quite get clarified/solved by the time the end is reached. But the poem overall is brilliant in concept. The idea is powerful. I would merely advise that some more sculpting be done.

[Avia]

Thank you very much. I had the same thoughts as you when I read it again. I'll see how I can make it better. I posted another poem today "Her". I would love your thoughts on it

[송지ፏ..]

Nice. I am envious of my friends who had great fathers because mine was some drunk who often beat and sexually abused me every day.

[Avia]

wow, so sorry you had to go through that. I hope you make a wonderful father some day

[송지석 / Ji-Suk]

I'm expecting twin babies. We don't know their gender until a few weeks.

[Avia]

congratulations!! I wish you nothing but joy