Wedding

Wedding

A Chapter by Aynsley

I awoke the next morning to the beautiful sun shining through my windows, Hamish was  already gone, getting himself ready for our big day. I hurled myself up from my bed and skipped into the bathroom. I turned the shower on and stripped off my silk pajamas.

 

The water was nice and warm running down my body, I squeezed out some Strawberry shampoo and begun to thoroughly wash my hair. The scent was delightful and smelt like fruit; it was my favourite.

 

I grabbed my razor and began to shave the tiny hairs on my legs until my legs were silky and smooth. Finally when I got out the shower I dried my hair.

 

The limo was to arrive in three hours so it was time to get changed, I wondered into my closet and pulled out my lovely wedding gown. I removed my towel and slipped into the perfectly fitted dress, it had a tight corset that clung to my body.

 

I had my maid do the back of it up, each strap was to be nice and tight, finally when my dress was fitted on me, my make-up artist arrived and started applying make-up to my face.

 

Like always my skin was flawless and perfect, most girls envied my beautiful apperance. Now I knew why.

 

I felt tingles flutter in my cheeks as she brushed on some blush, and applied the smokey eyeshadow. She applied some light lipgloss and some mascara to my eye lashes, afterwards she showed me myself in the mirror.

 

I stared back at my apperance almost wide eyed. I couldn't believe what I was seeing, I looked so beautiful, so glamorous, so perfect.

 

My eyes scanned the room until they stopped on the artist. I smiled sweetly and gasped. "This is stunning." I cried ,smiling with joy. I had never looked so great in my entire life I thought to myself.

 

I couldn't wait to get to the church. Everything was happening so fast, I laughed to myself, to be honest I couldn't wait, so I grabbed my things and waited outside for the limo.

 

When it arrived I was jumping for joy, I was so nervous but excited. I plunged myself down onto one of the seats and sighed. I was so happy. Nothing could get better then this.

 

I traced my fingers along the rim of the window, looking out of it; admiring the beautiful landscapes.

 

I could see trees everywhere, all crammed together; forests. I could see mountains surrounding us, and lucious grass blanketing the earths surface. I could see lovely horses trotting near one another, sheep feeding on the grass, and birds flying above.

 

It was a long way to get to the city since Hamish and I lived in the suburb. I preferred the open bush compared to being squished into some old apartment in the busy city. And so did he.

 

We arrived an hour later at the church, my father welcomed me with a hug, and escorted me to the door, there he wished me good luck as the guards opened the doors inviting us in.

 

We entered swiftly as the music began to play. I could see Hamish standing on the other side of the church smiling the most adorable smile I've ever seen. I waved as I passed Lea and my mum.

 

I had to try hard to keep tears from forming in my eyes, and luckily I did. Atlest for this day my make-up wouldn't go to waste.

 

When we reached the end my father kissed me on the cheek and parted from me, beginning to sit near my mother. I looked back one final time and took a step closer to Hamish, all I could think about was him, and all I could do was blush.

 

I felt so nervous being watched by everyone from school, and some elderly people I didn't know existed until my mother begged me to let them come. I sighed quietly to myself and looked at the priest just in time for him to say;

 

"Dearly beloved, we are gathered together here in the sight of God, and in the face of this company, to join together this Man and this Woman in holy Matrimony;; which is an honourable estate, instituted of God, signifying unto us the mystical union that is betwixt Christ and his Church: which holy estate Christ adorned and beautified with his presence and first miracle that he wrought in Cana of Galilee, and is commended of Saint Paul to be honourable among all men: and therefore is not by any to be entered into unadvisedly or lightly; but reverently, discreetly, advisedly, soberly, and in the fear of God. Into this holy estate these two persons present come now to be joined. If any man can show just cause, why they may not lawfully be joined together, let him now speak, or else hereafter for ever hold his peace."

 

No one spoke a single word so the priest started again, looking at Hamish this time. " Wilt thou have this Woman to thy wedded wife, to live together after God's ordinance in the holy estate of Matrimony? Wilt thou love her, comfort her, honour, and keep her in sickness and in health; and, forsaking all others, keep thee only unto her, so long as ye both shall live?"

 

Hamish smiled at me "I will."  The priest turned to me and smiled a soft grin.

 

"Wilt thou have this Man to thy wedded husband, to live together after God's ordinance in the holy estate of Matrimony? Wilt thou love him, comfort him, honour, and keep him in sickness and in health; and, forsaking all others, keep thee only unto him, so long as ye both shall live? "

 

"I will." I replied, looking at both of them, stomach fluttering. Hamish took my hand and slid the ring onto my finger, I did the same for him.

 

We both turned to face the priest who began to talk again. "Then I shall pronounce you husband and wife, you may now kiss the bride."

 

Hamish placed his hand on my cheek and brought me closer to him, he placed his soft lips on mine and kissed me sweetly, but then pulled away, taking my hands in his and whispering. "I love you Eva." He smiled, kissing me once more.

 

The crowd applauded, as Hamish picked me up off the ground. We then exited towards the door, and I threw the bouquet over my head so someone could catch it. I turned around swiftly to find my mother caught it. She had a wide smile upon her face. I smiled back at her.

 

Me and Hamish got in the limo and drove off. I didn't know where our honeymoon ought to be, all I knew was. It was a "secret".




© 2010 Aynsley


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I didn't get past the first couple of paragraphs because there were too many minute details. I have no sense of who this character is and therefore no interest in what she is doing. I'm guessing this isn't the first chapter.
Also there is a lot of "telling" but not enough "showing". Some word selection bothered me as well, such as: "I HURLED myself up from my bed and SKIPPED into the bathroom.
It's obvious you are a good writer, I think if you dug a little deeper you could describe her enthusiasm for the day with more vibrant words. Best regards, ~M

Posted 12 Years Ago


Written well but definitely not what I find interesting. Some writers can make anything appeal to just about anyone, I'm one of those people who can appreciate the effort and the story itself but at the same time not really see the point in reading about it as it.

I can bet anyone would want a wedding day to be like what you have described. A real twist would be the "secret" place turning the honey moon into a real horror story. Or Hamish being some under cover cop or a drug lord.

Posted 13 Years Ago


Good description! I could feel the excitement that the lead character was feeling. Liked the emotion and the "Happily ever after" feel this chapter gave off.

Posted 13 Years Ago


beautiful chapter

Posted 13 Years Ago


wow, this is completely well written and amazing.
well done! ^_^

Posted 13 Years Ago


It was very clearly written but I feel like you could have taken more time and been more descriptive. For example, she could describe what the church looked like or what the make-up artists looked like. LIttle details of the character's mind like those enhances the effect of seeing through her eyes and makes the reader feel more like they are there with her than hearing her talk about it.

However it was clearly written and did well to continue the story.

Posted 13 Years Ago


You describe the scene really well love :)
A story well told and a beautiful one
xx

Posted 13 Years Ago


100!!!

Posted 13 Years Ago


Wow amazing :)

Posted 13 Years Ago



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Added on July 21, 2010
Last Updated on July 21, 2010


Author

Aynsley
Aynsley

Sunshine Coast, Maroochydore, Australia



About
Hello my name is Aynsley, but you can call me Amy. I love to review other peoples' writing, so send me a message requesting a review, and wala! I'm quite a shy person. And I guess I always will.. more..

Writing
Chapter 1. Chapter 1.

A Chapter by Aynsley


Chapter 2. Chapter 2.

A Chapter by Aynsley



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