This Man I Once Knew

There was this man I once knew

He could move mountains without strain

He could even stop the rain

A whole army couldn't dent his pride

But how does he really feel inside?

Does he ever desire to run and hide?

I believe there's a vice versa maturity here

Leaving behind everything that he held so dear

Yes there was this man I once knew but he is no more

Confused about what he's really fighting for

He knows deep down but he won't be shamed

No one should know of his devilish ways

Keeping it hidden and letting his burden burn

He'll wait patiently for the man he once knew to take his turn

 

 

 

 

 

Reviews

[reflectingus]

Many strong people would have the weakness of being unable to show how they really feel, the innocence and fear inside a body made of still, coated with pride. I loved the way you elicited the meaning of pride, with hints of regret. The flow is great, I liked the rhyme, and so much has been conveyed in this succinct piece. Well concluded, and well written, loved it.

[Kuhr Gred]

:) i like the way you express or describe your friend :) GREAT WRITE! thanks for sharing
-Kuhr Gred

[Renée]

I can visualize him as I read..so strong full of uncrushed dreams..so proud..
then the unknown.. your description is great ! has a longing to it as I read..

[Rosalind Gale]

A man for all seasons - and for none. I think I have encountered this man.
I enjoyed the simplicity and positive thought that seemed to run through it.
Thank you BM,
Rosa -x-

[Lunny]

the rhythm is kind of messed up a bit and the paragraphs are too long, more like sentences...

[Neva Flores Smith - Cha..]

This puts me in mind of the masks we as humans wear.........what really lies underneath? Excellent.

[BMColey]

oh thanks for the comments!

[BMColey]

I actually tried to make it seem like im talking about someone else and then towards the end reveal its actually me that ive been talking about the whole time. thats hard to do tho

[Mockingbird]

sometimes people live behind facades and perform it well. however as much contentment they show on the outside, we don't know the pain they hide on the inside. very insightful poem.

[Kevin Anthony]

I think we all know someone like this, a person who just seems to have everything going for them, but of course, we can't know what's going on inside their heads.
The interesting thing is that at some stage someone has probably looked up to each of us in the same way without us even realising it.
Well done.

[AK]

Wow! Nice poem! I love the way you expressed your topic. Keep writing!