You know it's April when

An unexpected tale

You know it's April when...

I woke up suddenly by the beeping sound of my phone; that long beep indicating a text has arrived.  It was 2:10 pm, the sweat dripping from an overdue nap.  I reached for the phone and read the message “love you” that was all it said.  I look at the number it was 555-111-7273 and it was Lucinda.   I just smile and texted her back saying “I love you too!” and clicked the send button.

I crawled out of bed and headed to the kitchen for my daily dose of coffee.  I scooped up some of that aromatic revelation that will fill the apartment with the fresh smell of rich coffee that speaks to you; wake up.  Just add some water and it is a done deal.  As it perked, I called my friend Randy, and got nothing but his voice mail.  Still brewing…called my friend Karen, got her voice mail also. 

Finally, the brew master delivered a piping hot cup of coffee that I was ready to sip.  I thought about putting some cloths on but honestly, who cares, I ‘m in here by myself and I am not expecting any visitors.  I walked over to my recliner, that lush tan chair that makes me feel like a king.  Oh yes it does, and when company comes over, it’s a mean dash to get to my recliner.  Of course, my guest gets the full run of the comfortable stuff.

I clicked on the remote power and sat there looking at the news wondering if there was ever anything good, but same old same old.  As I was listened to the anchor speak, a high pitch rattling at my door startled me. 

“Who is it?”  I shouted.

There was no response, and the door opened.  I looked for my bat but it was too late, the people stepped in, along with my landlord.  I stood there in astonishment looking at my landlord knowing two things, one I was stark naked and the other, she had no right to be in my apartment.  I yelled at her to get out of my apartment but she just ignored me, and walked into my bedroom.  After just a few minutes, two paramedics wheeled a gurney in.  Everything in the room froze as if the film was developing before my eyes.

An attractive young woman stood before me as I blushed.  I wondered is it possible I am dead and don’t know it and is this god as I envisioned her?

The woman spoke.  “Do you remember telling me five years ago that I do not have a sense of humor?”

I stuttered, “Yes, I do.  I thought you had no sense of humor.”

“Do you know what happen here?”

“Yes, I think so, I’m dead.”

She smiles at me with her beautiful eyes and  touches my face.  “April Fools my love.”  

Suddenly I woke up.

Reviews

[E. Leo Wells]

Eaton County, I'm having difficult in discerning the start of the story, which is part of the beginning of the story, followed by the middle and end. The most important aspect of the short story, or the first chapter, first paragraph. is having a real bang for your buck. There is no prescribed formula, with the exception that it kick off the story, so the reader has a reason to read on. Twists are nice, only if they are not telegraphed or anticipated. Two things that will help sell the story. First, be careful using words with the suffix "ly", nor verbs with suffixes, especially "ing", the suffix steals the energy of the verb and looses value as a verb. Flow is critical to short stories, it has to be an easy read. Word selection has to be right on, "the sweat dripping from an overdue nap." Naps don't sweat, people sweat etc and so on. It is a tough read...The coffee was/is ready to be devoured. too many words. To test the story's validity, try writing a tag line, like you would see in the TV Guide, and see if that is what you wanted. This is about the best I can do, and let the characters tell the story, not the writer. E Wells TC, MI