The Man In The Bar

A collaboration with Yuval Freund - she's in black bold - I'm in red italic

 

As I sit and wonder

on the day that have passed,

I've notice some air

on one side of the glass.

 

Job has been hard

and the boss unforgiving.

I came here to forget

now I think about leaving.

 

My eyes drift aside,

suddenly - there she is.

Is that a serious look,

or is she trying to tease?

 

As I walk to her table

my hands start to sweat.

What should I say

to this girl I've just met?

 

I'm not that kind of man,

but before I could think

I found myself ordering

two of her drink.

 

As we started to talk

I felt a connection.

I hope that she too

shares my attraction.

 

Just a girl in a bar

Looking pretty and petite

Hating every man I've met

Everyone of them decides to cheat

 

I planned to drink

Til the night is through

Maybe it's the drinks talking

I feel like I'm falling for you

 

Cupid has shot me yet again

Succumbing to his arrow's poison

As I keep staring into those eyes

Almost numb without a reason

 

A guardian angel

Or the devil in disguise

Hopefully not another man

To push my heart's demise

 

After all it has been through

As I'm wishing upon a star

Maybe it's the drinks talking

Falling for the man in the bar

 

 

 

 

 

Author's Note

Yuval - black bold
Rayne - Red italic

Reviews

[Captain Blackheart (The..]

What a wonderful write, great flow. A brilliant collaberation!

[Michael X]

this is an exceptional collaboration in more than one regard, the wording,
the design, the imagery, how the events are unfolding, the romantic aspect
about it, and how the two point of views blend together to create the
overall vision and emotion, as well as atmosphere, subtly pizzazzing, mike

[DarkAngelWriter]

Ooooo I likes it. Yuval ish awesome and so ish you! ^_^

[ah]

very amazing

[John Parker]

Good collab. was a very nice write and the flow of the work was really good......

[.]

Hehe, yea, i see what ur sayin. Yea, all of those things go thru ur mind; and you know that u dont want to get hurt again, and it's so hard to really "know," or find out about this mysterious person. I'd be cautious, too, as i have been hurt many, many times. Very awesome collaboration, u guys :)

Mikey

[Vatsayayana]

Yum Yum.
Do you mind if I root for the couple to make it???
~grin~ I'm such a hopeless romantic. :-P
This is just lovely. I love the look into both of their minds.
It's well done.
Brava!

[John Coolidge]

I liked how you two decided to write from different points of view. Cool picture, too. Great job.

[Tania Leigh]

I love collaborations and this one did not disappoint, ladies....very nice :-)

[poddar kushal]

this poem has an effect of matured scotch on me.

[Rain]

Blended perfect. Great look inside the minds of two strangers, both lost in their own way. Rain..