A WALK IN THE RAIN

A WALK IN THE RAIN

A Poem by Betty Hermelee
"

LOST LOVE

"

A WALK IN THE RAIN

 

I failed to impede you this time

we shared such wholeness

yet, you shunted me

we preserved all the elements

you and I lit the stars

crossed the waves

winked at the moon

set the sun on fire

ours was a keeper

or so I deemed

you packed your bags

and stepped out in the pouring rain

on a foggy morn

as I granted your exit

My eyes welled up with mixed salty tears

 

Now I am alone to wonder why

where have you gone?

I truly desire your being

your flesh, your green eyes, your caress

will you think of me sometimes?

I will scribble you a note if you do the same

where will I find comfort?

since you left me

just when I needed you most

 

 

 

 

© 2021 Betty Hermelee


Author's Note

Betty Hermelee
https://pandora.app.link/DLfg8kVDglb
RANDY VAN WARMER "JUST WHEN I NEEDED YOU MOST

My Review

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Featured Review

This was relatable and flowed well. Overall, I really liked it but it slapped me in my logic with the rain pouring and it was foggy. I know this can happen, especially on hilly terrain, but the line caught me off guard enough so I had to stop and re-read those two lines over, making sure I didn't read it wrong. Once I knew that I didn't, I re-read the whole thing and it flowed without stopping. --- Thanks for a pleasant read. And might I offer some sound advice from the past? Stay clear of those with green eyes. :)

Posted 1 Week Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Betty Hermelee

1 Week Ago

Thank you for visiting and reviewing my poem.
I live in the mountains and we get p,entry of C.. read more
Betty Hermelee

1 Week Ago

Sorry for the spelling errors, appreciate your comments…..and thanks for stopping by!
Best<.. read more
JE Falcon

1 Week Ago

No problem, my pleaser. :)



Reviews

So much emotion through out your write, kinda of relatable as well.
Love the song choice.

Posted 1 Week Ago


Betty Hermelee

1 Week Ago

Thank you Alex and nice of you to stop by.
Best, Betty
This was relatable and flowed well. Overall, I really liked it but it slapped me in my logic with the rain pouring and it was foggy. I know this can happen, especially on hilly terrain, but the line caught me off guard enough so I had to stop and re-read those two lines over, making sure I didn't read it wrong. Once I knew that I didn't, I re-read the whole thing and it flowed without stopping. --- Thanks for a pleasant read. And might I offer some sound advice from the past? Stay clear of those with green eyes. :)

Posted 1 Week Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Betty Hermelee

1 Week Ago

Thank you for visiting and reviewing my poem.
I live in the mountains and we get p,entry of C.. read more
Betty Hermelee

1 Week Ago

Sorry for the spelling errors, appreciate your comments…..and thanks for stopping by!
Best<.. read more
JE Falcon

1 Week Ago

No problem, my pleaser. :)
This I can empathise with of old. Tell it as it is with that extra sadness on the side. Exceptional.

Posted 1 Week Ago


Betty Hermelee

1 Week Ago

Thanks Ken for a thoughtful review, much appreciated!
Sometimes communication between partners breaks down to the point where signs of impending danger are not perceived until it's too late. On the other hand, one partner can have secretly planned a sudden exit for a long time prior to its inaction. Either way, the effect on the deserted partner will be traumatic.

Posted 1 Week Ago


Betty Hermelee

1 Week Ago

Thanks for your review John….this is a take on the song”just when I needed you most”…😊
I hope this is not your actual experience
The walking out scenario seems much too easy these days
Maybe it is for the better
Recently happened with my son and they (each with new partners) seem to have regretted parting
Having kids involved makes it all even more difficult

Posted 2 Weeks Ago


Betty Hermelee

2 Weeks Ago

Thanks, Dave, not my experience, but that of the song by Randy Vanwarmer..."Just when I needed you m.. read more
This is by far the most emotion I've seen you pack into a poem. This is the perfect balance between your natural straightforward tendencies & your newly-acquired poetic penchant for speaking somewhat thru imagery. Overall, intensely felt (((HUGS)))

Posted 2 Weeks Ago


Betty Hermelee

2 Weeks Ago

Thanks Margie for that great review....I'm so glad you see improvement! Happy Turkey Day!
hug.. read more
Betty Hermelee

2 Weeks Ago

Even though you don't celebrate!!!
there is such a truthful poignant emotion that runs through this heartfelt piece. One would have to not be human in order to not empathize with these sorrowful words. I was moved by them myself. Very nicely written B and straight from the heart with emotion.

Posted 2 Weeks Ago


Betty Hermelee

2 Weeks Ago

Thanks Carlos for a lovely review.
Best, B.
that is a great song, and bravo on it for the last line of this poem...
Works into the poem so well.

a friend of mine had his wife leave him...no note, nothing...he still to this day does not know why.
so sad here,
j.

Posted 2 Weeks Ago


Betty Hermelee

2 Weeks Ago

I love that song...had to write about it, thanks always for a fine review J.
Best
B.
dear Betty... A walk in the Rain is a lonely time
when someone has silently left... Wishing you a
Chance at Happiness and the Caress of a worthy
Partner... perhaps you will meet "Blue Eyes crying in the Rain",
and together you can plant a Garden of ever-blooming refrains.
tenderly, Pat

Posted 2 Weeks Ago


Betty Hermelee

2 Weeks Ago

I love this song and felt a need to write about it...
lovely review Pat, as always
Bes.. read more
I truly desire your being
your flesh, your green eyes, your caress
will you think of me sometimes?
Oh wow ..this is a poignant piece
I can feel the wanton emotions
the in depth need of longing
for this lost love who walked out
on that rainy day

so we'll penned.
and deeply expressed

Posted 2 Weeks Ago


Betty Hermelee

2 Weeks Ago

Thank you so much Fran, really appreciate your reviews.
Best, B

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Added on November 17, 2021
Last Updated on November 17, 2021

Author

Betty Hermelee
Betty Hermelee

Black Mountain, NC



About
My love of poetry results from my love of art. As a painter I am able to express myself on a canvas. As a poet my words come from my heart, my moods, sometimes sad, mostly upbeat. I like to use vivid .. more..

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