Sonneteer

Poem that resembles an English Sonnet

We have one hundred-forty syllables,

to wax poetic ~ tell some stories well.

We’ll sing a song as written decibels;

notes heard by all, whereon the page they fell.

.

With naught but ten per fourteen lines of prose;

and thoughts of life, love rendered lyrical. 

Death’s melodies we poets will compose ~

imagination sung is wonderful!

.

Three stanza stand atop resolved couplets ~

together, chant in perfect harmony.

Or, octaves call from where they fall ... sestets.

In rhyme these bards of olde do hold the key.

.

For Shakespeare, Petrarch, ‘n ol’ Ed Spenser,

hearts beat iambic ~ love’s pentameter.

.

2022

Author's Note

I’m off meter in the 13th line. Sounds like a poetic horror show ... ‘The Thirteenth Line’. But I want that rhyme soooo bad! And I don’t exactly turn in the Volta. Please forgive my license.

Reviews

[lightsong]

Cleverly and "naughtily" done (I love the word naught there, just a perfect Billigami touch at the right place!) of course I will choose this one. but as You already know, when it come to the structure of the Sonnet I am not the one to ask :> once I wanted a write a poem titled (Sonnet and Sonneteer) lol but not in a sonnet form so I thought it would be ridiculous.

Great One Bill.

[William Michael Reeves]

I ask naught of you, just so very happy you blew poetical dust on me the way you do. So as I sip my morning brew, contemplating the world spinning in this primal stew, I gratefully accept your nice review.

Billigami

[lightsong]

Ha! Billigami on the role and I am this morning naught of my poetical brew!

[Neville]

.. No prob wotsoeva .. all is forgived and trooly tooly too .. wot a brill approximation, so congratulations to you :)

[Ken e Bujold]

nothing to be forgiven for. It's a well thought out finely tuned almost perfect sonnet in an age where such works are rare, if ever tried. And as Winston so rightly put, breaking the pentameter was the first heave.

Pound also said, in order to break the rules you first had to know what they were. People quite often mistake that to mean in order to write free you had to master the old, but he was being much more nuanced. What he was getting at was this, in order to write great (or even passable) free verse you need to learn to trust your ear, and one of the best ways to learn that is by disciplining yourself to craft a line to fit a structure, learning to not just settle for something, but really sweating to find that perfect word to match the image you're trying to convey. by mastering the line you will learn where and how it can be fractured.

[William Michael Reeves]

Thank you Ken. Your insight regarding poetry is clear in how you articulate it. I have learned the fracturing process improves the poetic voice, and creates satisfying frustration when the line seems to master me. You made a good point ... trust your ear. Relax. Don't force it. That is the discipline necessary. I look forward to reading you, thanks.

Bill

[Ken e Bujold]

yes thats it. and accept that the ear is not always going to be right. Even now, 40+ years of playing this mugs game of poetry I find times where my ear badly misled me. Its just what it is
keep on with your writing I look forward to reading more

[W. Barrett Munn]

Check out Sonnet 29 by William Shakespeare-I wouldn’t sweat breaking pentameter once or twice. Or as Ezra Pound said, “Breaking pentameter, that was the first heave.”
I like your slant rhyme use.
W.

[William Michael Reeves]

I will check the olde bard out. Thanks for the reassurance. May I ask what 'slant rhyme' means. Never heard it before. I'm guessing it's rhymes that don't have the same letters?

[W. Barrett Munn]

Slant rhyme also called near rhyme or half rhyme. Cat/hot I call wonderful/lyrical slant rhyme.

[W. Barrett Munn]

Technically, slant rhyme uses a matching final consonant or vowel but not both.

[William Michael Reeves]

My knowledge has been enhanced. Thank you.

[William Michael Reeves]

Just read ol' number 29. Out of meter in a couple lines. Bad rhyme. Then I read 18 and he made up for it there. I admit, I'm not that well read where the classics are concerned. I need to do something about that. Thanks for motivating me.

[Red Brick Keshner]

Licence is key in the art of poetry
That no metre or rhyme do crime
it's horrors to poets a blissful malady

[Betty Hermelee]

I did like the rhythm... I feel as if you're really experimenting with different kinds of poetry... nothing wrong with that, but I loved the old WM poetry better, much looser.... and more interesting...but I enjoyed this "trial " of yours" as well.
Best, B

[William Michael Reeves]

Thanks. As it happens I finished a poem yesterday that might fit the bill. (Pardon the pun) letting it relax for a bit. Stay tuned ...

[Betty Hermelee]

I'm waiting! You're every welcome!
Best, B

[Brad Dehler]

I really enjoyed the meter of this poem. Very rhythmic and I could tell you were crafting this very carefully. Lol, I forgive your creative license on the curse'd 13th line.
The 13th & 14th lines seem well done to me
"For Shakespeare, Petrarch, ‘n ol’ Ed Spenser,
hearts beat iambic ~ love’s pentameter."
It doesn't feel contrived as you may fear (from your Author's note). But yes, perhaps -to keep it fun and elevated- try to release the bonds of strict structure. Perhaps. This may be your forte, it has never been mine.

[William Michael Reeves]

Not so much contrived, as just out of meter. Spenser is trochaic. I tried every which way to force it iambic, but it is what it is ... what I want. The contrivance may be taking license. My device to wield words incorrectly. Thanks for the review. Read you soon.

Bill

[Aura]

Your error in meter can be forgiven in the 13th line, for this is a wonderful "almost" Sonnet about what a sonnet is about! I find writing poems about poem forms can be a daunting task because how do you write about a form and procedure in a poetic way? well, my question was answered in this piece. My oh my, I enjoyed reading this, the way you include everything about sonnets in the poem in such a strategic and poetic way. For this, a small error in meter can be looked past. Thanks for sharing Bill, I certainly enjoyed this read :)

[William Michael Reeves]

Thanks Aura. Strategic is a good description of this. Plotting all the musical terms and parts of a Sonnet with numbers at the start of each verse was tricky. I wonder if other poets have struggled with the 13th line? Maybe it's a thing. Thanks

[Aura]

You are most welcome. Perhaps other poets struggled with the 13th line. Could the number 13 really be that unlucky? a myth turned true?

[jacob erin-cilberto]

sometimes maybe the yearning for rhyming might be let go a tad.
it's a good piece regardless of the unlucky 13th line.
Spenser eh?
Have you ever read the Robert B. Parker Spenser novels? the detective with the name spelled like the poet?

they are the best.
I applaud your effort to dive into so many different forms...
but I would love to see some poetry from you, Bill, that doesn't worry about form so much as just letting it go from the gut and heart....so the real poet behind the poet, jumps out at us from the page.
j.

[William Michael Reeves]

I think about what you said every day Jacob. Poetry has become more challenge than expression. Obsessed with form and trying to keep my poetic voice while satisfying requirements. I wrote this one a few months ago so it's not part of the lessons. As it happens, there's a break in the lessons and I have a bunch of poems I started before I discovered poetic forms. I think you'll be reading some of what you're asking for soon. You are partly responsible for my tunnel writing. You corrected me about haiku and and that dropped me into the ocean of poetic form. I agree, sometimes feels like I'm drowning in it. I appreciate that you are interested enough to say something about it. Thank you.

I haven't read those detective novels. I'll search them.

[John the Baptist]

I must say, you're becoming a poetic Renaissance man. Quite impressive. You might, however, consider ditching that first comma in the last couplet.

[William Michael Reeves]

I really appreciate that you care enough to not just blindly read it and share constructive feedback. Let me consider that ........ after careful consideration, I agree. The comma changes the meaning of 'for'. For Shakespeare, assigns possession wheras the comma creates a coloquial timeline. I will edit this promptly. Punctuation still befuddles me. Thanks for elevating me to the past. Now if I could just achieve the man part of renaissance man ....