The hidden hope**

This is a piece about dissociative identity disorder. This is my experiance raw uncut yee haw. I got part of the name from a piece I read on wc. The title might not make sense or it might.

You attached your self to the little girl

who's been hiding in me for many years.

 

She was a child , that was violated but has no

no memory of the nightmare.

 

I try to keep her protected,

but what's attached to her is making her

diseased , fearful , and full of melancholy.

 

It lives nowhere but can appear anyplace.

Each day becoming more vile and then suddenly

disappearing before your face.

 

I pray and pray for the vision of you to go away.

 

My black liquid angel from hell. When will you be

satified with her and unhandcuff her from your tail?

 

Each night I pray , each day I try to remember , 

but what is locked away in me has chosen to

to remain in the dark forever.

Author's Note

This issue involves did and bpd in combination. It's my first shot at writing about this so i'm kind of nervous. Anyway I hope you get something out of it.

Reviews

[Tony]

This is kinda chilling-- I mean, if u read it without thinking of the descriptions at the beginning or in the author's note. Then it reads like a ghost story. You know, like The Grudge or something-- or at least that's what it reminded me of. Anyway-- Riveting words!

[BLACKCRUSH]

Would it freak you out if I told you that this piece is based on a true story :) I kid you not lol I usually write whats going on around me or with personally. Im really glad you liked it :) Thank you :)

[B]

Yet you have shined light on her
And shared her with us

Must be getting less dark
Very dramatic piece here

[KanaDream]

I see it as a pure and innocent child that is in all of us showing what we were when we were innocent and brought purely into this world only to find out what life is like and then be closed off inside a shell that allows our shred of originality to survive...

Very dark and beautiful. Keep Dreaming.

[BLACKCRUSH]

Thank you Kana :) This is about loss of child hood....more emotional and mental I believe ....but who knows? Thank you for your kind words :)

[B-poet]

There's a deep and genuine eloquence about this poem. It sheds light on the complexities of this harmful disorder. Great work. An eye opening & intriguing read. :)

[BLACKCRUSH]

Thank you :)

[EmpressPoetess]

I can relate to this. With PTSD and major depression, I have been chained down but now I'm free thru therapy and bible study. very creative writing!

[Brian W. Hastings]

by the sound of the poem this is like a nightmare that you can only try to ignore. This is what I got out of it so please don't be offended if that wasn't what you were going for. In truth, this piece can have multiple meanings to anyone not going through this.

Each night I pray . Each day I try to remember ,

but I cant. I guess I should upset ,but what would be

the point of that.

This I can relate to. I have repressed memories and this is pretty much how I feel. How can I deal with it when I can't remember sort of thing. All I can do is try to ignore the symptoms those memories are producing and go on about my life but it infuriates me to no end that I can suffer from something "That never happened".

I'm really glad you put this on here. Keep writing. It is a good piece with a lot of intense imagery.