I DARE SAY

I DARE SAY

A Poem by Maureen Mwaniki
"

:-P

"
So much zeal
Do not stop
Please, do preach
Sex trade, sex slaves
Illegal, I agree!
But Mr. Minister
You are sinister!
Was it not a naughty nurse
I saw at the back of your merc
Or does your wife play dress up?

Excellent standards
You have my applause
May even surpass Harvard’s
In a year or so…
But tell, principal Edwards
That girl rose
The one you sent home
I heard she’s due
In a month or so
Pity she got knocked up
Didn’t you rubber up,
Before you put her legs up?

Father, please forgive me
I have sinned
I let a man
Take advantage of me
When I heard you preach
Your words convicted me
But from what I hear
You’re no better than me
That alter boy…
Have you no shame!
Your boy toy
Is just a little over ten!

I don’t judge you
Because am a saint
In many ways
You and I are same
I just like my wine
Better than my water
But unlike you
I dare say
If you like your wine
Better than your water
I dare you to say

© 2011 Maureen Mwaniki


My Review

Would you like to review this Poem?
Login | Register




Featured Review

Really liked it. Like the structure, the 3 stanzas per scenario, and the flow along with rhyme scheme. i just wanted to point out though, in the second line of the last stanza you wrote, "Because am a saint," did you mean to add more words to it or not? the line just confused me.
Also, I was thinking that a poem like this might benefit if it were a bit longer, might want to try to come up with more scenarios, however if you find yourself forcing ideas, I would recommend leaving it as is.
And also, in the last stanza, the narrator states how they are alike to the person in which they are speaking of - I sort of wanted to know how with some more detail.

Hope you don't take my criticism too harsh, lol, it really is a great poem and I enjoyed it a lot, just giving some of the "what if's." It's always nice to have people say they like a poem, but I think it's better when advice is also given on maybe how to improve. Great job, keep it up.

Posted 13 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.




Reviews

It's an actual poem, holy s**t! Keep up the good work, this was rather amazing in my eyes.

Posted 13 Years Ago


This was the whole package! Haha this poem was so comical and bit so hard but managed to maintain a soft touch about it. I'm told majority of people are screaming on this site and this piece hits base with a calm brash unique technique writers are forgetting to utilize. Definitely a thumbs up from me- knocked my socks off!!

Posted 13 Years Ago


Great movement and story in the poem. I try my best to keep my opinion to myself. Most of us will learn the hard way. People who preach perfection. In the end their weakness were just a myth. Few perfect souls walking around. So many lines I like in the poem. I like poetry like this poem. Make you think about the subject matter. A outstanding poem. Thank you.
Coyote

Posted 13 Years Ago


The new evolution of poetry
This poem, borne of the text generation
Punchy feel, to the quick and snappy end!
That's how she rolls...

Posted 13 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Good!
''Was it not a naughty nurse
I saw at the back of your merc
Or does your wife play dress up?''

''But tell, principal Edwards
That girl rose
The one you sent home
I heard she’s due
In a month or so
Pity she got knocked up
Didn’t you rubber up,
Before you put her legs up?''

It was well said. Sharp.


Posted 13 Years Ago


Really liked it. Like the structure, the 3 stanzas per scenario, and the flow along with rhyme scheme. i just wanted to point out though, in the second line of the last stanza you wrote, "Because am a saint," did you mean to add more words to it or not? the line just confused me.
Also, I was thinking that a poem like this might benefit if it were a bit longer, might want to try to come up with more scenarios, however if you find yourself forcing ideas, I would recommend leaving it as is.
And also, in the last stanza, the narrator states how they are alike to the person in which they are speaking of - I sort of wanted to know how with some more detail.

Hope you don't take my criticism too harsh, lol, it really is a great poem and I enjoyed it a lot, just giving some of the "what if's." It's always nice to have people say they like a poem, but I think it's better when advice is also given on maybe how to improve. Great job, keep it up.

Posted 13 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

I agree with Angela. She said everything I was going to say. Really nicely done, though. I thoroughly enjoyed it.

Posted 13 Years Ago


Not often that a writing can make me laugh, smirk, get pissed of and in general just feel every emotion on the continuum. I love the line "In many ways we are same" It packed a bigger punch without the verb and I just love the meaning behind it. Good write!

Posted 13 Years Ago



Share This
Email
Facebook
Twitter
Request Read Request
Add to Library My Library
Subscribe Subscribe


Stats

468 Views
8 Reviews
Rating
Added on February 24, 2011
Last Updated on February 24, 2011

Author

Maureen Mwaniki
Maureen Mwaniki

Nairobi, Kenya



About
Every world has its faults,the one we live in has too many and humanity finds comfort in diffrent things!Me?am just a girl who finds hers in writing more..

Writing

Related Writing

People who liked this story also liked..


Rhythm  Rhythm

A Poem by Robin