The Place Where Dreams Die

I'm thinking of entering this to a poetry contest... Any comments? Please review!

A strange wispy white line

I watch as you descend

You float and dance about

From beautiful end to end

You come so softly quietly

I scarecly do believe

That you've come all this way

Just to be with lil ol me

I watch with a smile as you come

You're suddenly close by

Like an image sent from heaven

Into reality you fly

Your colors they're magnificent

The way you dance for me

I feel my heart beating

In time with yours so free

I twirl you in my fingers

I weave you through my hair

I wave you about like a flag

I watch your colors and your flare

And all this time you let me

You do not object

You accept all my caresses

My love you don't dare deflect

But suddenly you flicker

And your colors die away

I wonder why you're leaving

As you wither and float away

Tears well up behind my eyes

And I turn my face away

For i finally understand

Why you came to me that day

And as you go back up to heaven

Where you go from leaving me

Then i cry again because

I know now what you're meant to be

You my love were a dream

One i did not realize

When the opportunity arose

You flickered out and died

I should have taken chances

I should have been more brave

But now you're gone and all i have

Is regret as i loose faith

I know where you went now

When you ascended to the sky

You went off to that lonely place

The place dreams go to die

Author's Note

Reviews

[Chris]

How did you two interact... where? What did both of you do and how? What didn't you do? Why? Etc.

To me you told part of a tale - beginning and end but left out the middle.

[Jessie]

Hm... I suppose i did. Thank you for your words, i'll give this some thought :)

[Chris]

The beginning went smoothly... the end was strong - tinged with regrets for - you didn't say what.

[Jessie]

That is also true haha... I meant for you to fill some of it in with your own experience, but perhaps i left too much to be filled. Thank you!

[Emily Feret]

What what a beautiful tale!

Thank you for sharing this magic. I took this as someone dying, or something dying, like perhaps a phase of life or a friendship or something along those lines, anyway, your words made me feel something so I thank you for that!

[Jessie]

Im glad you enjoyed :)
Thanks for your review!!

[zainul]

Such play of magical words!
Eloquently expressed your lost love.
The love you overlooked once, now haunts you in dreams.
My favorite stanza is:
"I should have taken chances
I should have been more brave
But now you're gone and all i have
Is regret as i loose faith
I know where you went now
When you ascended to the sky
You went off to that lonely place
The place dreams go to die "
Thanks for sharing.

[Jessie]

I'm glad you enjoyed it :)
Thanks for your review!

[zainul]

This is all my pleasure :)

[RachelReaper]

I'll take this as an omen. I need to tell someone something... now. Like, right now.

[Taylor]

Good Jess... it's sad though... :(

[Carolann Dowsett]

Wow Jessie this is so amazingly beautiful. So full of love yet so sad too. Wonderful write.

[Jessie]

Thank you :) xx

[Carolann Dowsett]

Welcome :)

[PurpleQuartz]

This poem was very beautiful!

[Jessie]

Thanks :)