Rarest love of all

Random

There's a constant reminder of the silence ringing inside my head.like doorbells on afternoons when the kids are locked out from school or like music on a saturday when the neighborhood is having their annual get together.There's a permanent foot print on my heart working backwards from finish to start,and like kids on a jungle gym it tends to move around with no destination just a constant repitition of the same things with a few tricks here and there.Its like a sunday dinner with the entire family in town and of course its not perfect if nothing goes down.consistant taps on the back but no one's there,and redicilous fear builds up until you get that hug from that someone who tends to be invisible,and you have the tendacy to mistake them for whats missing.In your life.Its a casual distraction from the world around you and everything appears to be to be black and white except the image in the mirror and the body heat thats building from the internal feelings of knowing that she's not reminsicing,nor missing the fact that its over and there no bringing the past back......and things tend to be this way until she faces the fact that things wont changed for her and she needs to move on.........love in the scariest way possible,hunting her down with no remourse for what she has to face............SHE'S CRUCIAL

 

 

 

 

 

 

Reviews

[universalove]

really nice . how sweet is life without family

[[untitled]]

I love way you wrote this. I have this feeling of understanding and not understanding a thing at the same time. It reminds me a lot of the lyrics by The Used. It makes no sense and perfect sense. I think this would make a great song if you're at all musically inclined.

[☮]

Beautiful flow. Totally understood.

[Emily Rose]

I like the style of this - the prose form fits it nicely and you've got some interesting and original imagery here. I'm not quite sure I understand what the message of the piece is, however - it seems to me like a rather random collection of images that come firing at my brain; it's a little disorienting, but I get the feeling that disorientation is what you were going for, in a sense.

I will say, though, that this poem is in desperate need of a spellcheck. I can understand typing directly in to the "add new writing" box, but it's really distracting to read a poem with frequent misspellings. Sorry, I'm not trying to harp on you - it's just something that really improves the poem but isn't that hard to do. :-)

Despite the errors, this was very interesting to read.

[Reeses]

who the heck are u hunting and i llyke dis signature ending u have. its capturing me wen i read