Late Night Stormy Paranoia

A poet searches and searches for words.

        Late Night Stormy Paranoia
 
                          He sat by candle light, shadow flames against a wall.
                          Pen in hand and pad of paper, insane voices down the hall.

                          Calling, Calling, Taunting, Taunting , itchy rafters under roof.
                          Madly writing, sweaty brow, shaggy beard, and single tooth.

                          Insane voices, creaky floors, cob web dances in a draft.
                          Late night stormy paranoia, writing spirals down a shaft.

                          Eerie laughter that he mutters, ice cold veins that beat with in.
                          Smiling plants, and singing rodents, last nights supper on his chin. 
                   
                          Voices calling, calling, thoughts are fast, like bat wings beat.
                          running around laughing wildly, setting down, then changing seats.

                          Writing fast, talking loudly, word induced insanity.
                          Late night stormy paranoia, soul consumed with calamity.

                          Viewer peers through dirty window, feelings which were very sad.
                          insidious acts of one old man, a desperate poet completely mad  

                          Pen is tapping against his forehead, gleaming look in his eyes.
                          Swarms of moths in his mind, continuous sounds of eager sighs.

                          Frantic pacing wall to wall, front door smashes  unto steps.
                          Lighting bolts and thunder crashes, head cocked back howling, MORE!

                          Late night stormy paranoia, jumbled words are his demise.
                          Late night stormy paranoia, haunt this poet as he cries.

Reviews

[Ees]

In the second to last stanza you use crashes twice which sounds too hard when reading the poem and the second crashes almost screams to be called "clapped" or claps.

This was an interesting poem with a hint of a story contained within. The image of this poet was very vivid. That is partially due to a romantic view I think most of us do have of these crazy writer types that we claim to be. Of course there is a reason for such a view.

This was fun to read and a little bit startling.
Great job!

[Alskar]

I'm not sure if you've ever seen 'Death Note', but this strongly reminds me of the character of Mikami and his 'Delete! Delete!' that he furiously scribbles. There's a really great setting here, I can imagine a middle-aged poet writing all his life and running out of words in a dark but candlelit room. I really applaud your structure, and I even don't mind the rhyming because it quickens the pace of the poem, which is what's going on in the poet's mind. Even though you tell us what's happening rather than showing, I love the directness of that. It adds to the story-telling element of the poem. You take my usual pet hates and make them work, this is very good.

[Lily Mae]

The craziness while in search of the perfect words... xx nicely written..x

[hmm]

very poetic, love the flow. Amazing!

[SoulCrusader (Yas)]

Wow so nice and amazing....wonderful tempo, really dig this :)

[Dove]

I haven't ever read a poem quite like this. It has an amazing flow.

[sivan]

possibly my favourite of all your poems... the flow is hypnoic and the ending quite touching