Monster Within

Monster Within

A Poem by Cladine
"

Voices will haunt you.

"

Those dark eyes have opened

The time you laid at night on bed

And saw the pitch-black wall of faces

Singing an unspoken curses

 

"Die, die, die"

 

At day your eyes were just in chaos

At night it is on the war

You recollected all the events

Go beyond comprehension

Stumble on abyss

 

"This, that, this, that"

 

Your nose sniffs the familiar scent

And it feeds your growling pet within

Struggling inside the high Bastille

Thrill soon to be released

 

"Consumed, open, consumed, open"

 

You're now all weary

From all those distress

You started to reset everything

As you fell asleep.

© 2015 Cladine


Author's Note

Cladine
So I was inspired by the anime I am watching “Monster" that is very creepy and uncomfortable.
Thank you for reading. :)

My Review

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Reviews

It's been a while since I encountered a poem standing out from the rest. Sure it's different, sure it's peculiar, but it has style and that's one way to catch someone's attention. The words used are sound, the building up was quite present as was the ending. Overall it's a good.

Posted 6 Years Ago


Wow!
Very well written and it touched me,
Can I just say though, you have potential!
My favorite part was, "Your nose sniffs the familiar scent
And it feeds your growling pet within
Struggling inside the high Bastille
Thrill soon to be released"
Please continue to write and read!
Can you by chance look at my story The Blonde Girl, It would really mean a lot to me.
Your new fan,

C. Lee Battaglia

Posted 6 Years Ago


Cladine

6 Years Ago

thank you :) sure.
Awesome Poetry here :) It was interesting to read this one :)

Posted 6 Years Ago


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dan
Very good use of your talent, stringing together words and phrases that, at first blush, don't connect that well. Then I read it again. It follows a pattern that is irregular but very impressive. This might be only the 3rd review I've done of your work but it is the best, by far, up to this point. Well done. take care...dan

Posted 6 Years Ago


Cladine

6 Years Ago

thank you dan :) what do you mean by irregular? sorry to ask I want to make it in a proper poem :) I.. read more
dan

6 Years Ago

I just mean that it doesn't follow a strict, regimented patters, and there is NOTHING wrong with tha.. read more
Cladine

6 Years Ago

thank you again :)
I could feel the write and even picture it in my head, nice way to tell the story :)
This is a really good write and an interesting one too, I could say that this could be a good start for story, because from what I've just read, you could write a really good story!
So great work on this write. 100% rating.

Posted 6 Years Ago


Is a beautiful thing when you connect to someone's words. Great write

Posted 6 Years Ago


Cladine

6 Years Ago

thank you :)
I KNOW THAT ANIME. It's on my list of 'to watch' animes hihi.


"At day your eyes [were] just in chaos


Thrill soon to [be] released"


From how I understand it, the monster is within the persona who is struggling to keep it under control but at the end of the day the tiredness just consumes him/her and lets everything go. Am I right? Anyway, right or not, I enjoyed reading this poem because there's an eeriness to it. We all do have our own monsters and at times the easiest thing to do is to just let it consume us. This is quite possibly one of my favorite pieces of yours. :)

This review was written for a previous version of this writing

Posted 6 Years Ago


This comment has been deleted by the poster.
Cladine

6 Years Ago

Really ? haha watch that anime! It's
crazy. :D
yes that's true.though the persona stru.. read more
Maja

6 Years Ago

You're welcome :)
its quite an interesting concept


This review was written for a previous version of this writing

Posted 6 Years Ago



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9 Reviews
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Shelved in 1 Library
Added on July 24, 2015
Last Updated on July 31, 2015
Tags: night, darkness

Author

Cladine
Cladine

Cavite,City, Philippines



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I'm not really good in anything especially when it comes to writing. But I really want to improve .I want to be a writer though I need to learn first a lot . Also I want to gain some friends who I can.. more..

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