Sunlit Star

Sunlit Star

A Chapter by Caradoc
"

For you...the only one who holds my heart...

"
Your starlit gaze has kept me here, I’m a captive
Of your eyes so like the fragile leaves of autumn, those auburn spheres.

Your voice is calling, luring me towards you.
Like a siren’s melody. The words you sing are haunting, perfect agony…

I try to look away but you have frozen me like icicles.
I am now trapped inside, lost inside
Like a captive wolf in summer. Destitute, in shame, I call you longingly.

I am lost and blind. I have stumbled and I have fallen on my knees. Sunlit Star
Please help me, guide my way.
Light my path oh Sunlit Star.

Loneliness presides over my once broken heart.
Burn away my deep pain with your scorching flame and save me.
I’m strengthened now that you are here, a new life giving light
Sometime later, in this night, for you I call…

I am lost and blind. I have stumbled and I have fallen on my knees. Sunlit Star
Please help me, guide my way.
Light my path oh Sunlit Star.

I am a shadow and you are the dawn, for so long I’ve been lost,
In the abyss of doubt, yes I know.
I can’t break these chains of mine without you, Sunlit Star, set me free,
Let me spread my wings above these pains of sorrow…

This darkened night has slowly found me, misery and pain.
Thank you, oh Sunlit Star, you gave to me hope…my shadow slowly fades away,
Blackened wings from night to day.
Where’s the angel that I was, is he gone now…

I am lost and blind. I have stumbled and I have fallen on my knees. Sunlit Star
Please help me, guide my way.
Light my path oh Sunlit Star.

I am lost and blind. I have stumbled and I have fallen on my knees. Sunlit Star
Please help me, guide my way.
Light my path oh Sunlight….



© 2015 Caradoc


Author's Note

Caradoc
The first poem I ever wrote for her.

My Review

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Reviews

This had me smiling, and it does feel like a new- found love, one that saves from lonliness, rescued from a past broken heart. Utterly romantic, it almost feels like a song...

Posted 11 Years Ago


Caradoc

11 Years Ago

It is a song. Every piece in this book is meant to be sung, and I have, at one time or another, sung.. read more
Horizon K.

11 Years Ago

Ha! I knew it! The further I got, the more I felt like singing it. Very sweet:)
Caradoc

11 Years Ago

Again, thanks. :)
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Pax
my Cheesiness brought me here ~ LOL, but seriously - your the romantic of the classic literature... and i was reading all the comments below and i found out that you have sung this to the special someone of yours ~ see!!!!!!!!! you have musical talents in you... you must have made a music video on this one ;)... but then again if it's too personal... then that special someone is your muse in this piece!

truly a star!

Posted 11 Years Ago


Caradoc

11 Years Ago

Indeed she is. No music video. I wouldn't know how, lol.

Thanks for the awesome read an.. read more
Pax

11 Years Ago

welcome.... making a film is hard... so let's leave that to the experts...:D
This poem as a whole is beautiful, but my favorite parts have to be

"Your starlit gaze has kept me here, I’m a captive
Of your eyes so like the fragile leaves of autumn, those auburn spheres.

Your voice is calling, luring me towards you.
Like a siren’s melody. The words you sing are haunting, perfect agony…

I try to look away but you have frozen me like icicles.
I am now trapped inside, lost inside
Like a captive wolf in summer. Destitute, in shame, I call you longingly."

The way you so perfectly executed the application of these ideas and meanings to your feelings for her is brilliant. These lines set different moods as well: eerie with the siren's song but needy and vulnerable like the imprisoned wolf. I also like how you positioned frozen icicles next to the wolf in the summer - two contrasting seasons or temperatures - and you somehow nicely blended the opposing ideas into one sensible feeling.

This was fantastic, and like the others have said, she better know how very lucky she is to be the subject of such a beautiful work.

Posted 11 Years Ago


Very interesting. Nice job!

Posted 11 Years Ago


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Mia
Please don’t be mad!! You know I think you are awesome (because you are). It’s beautiful because of the idea behind it and the love that is clearly evident in this poem. It just doesn’t rank in the top of your work. Granted, your top is of a far higher standard than most. I feel like I just swore at you :( but I don't mean it like that!

Posted 12 Years Ago


Sorrow resonates through every word of this poem, that much is known already; what I really love is the mysterious essence to this. Yes, we know you chased after this star for reasons unknown, yet we know nothing of the result. I could ponder this for hours and still have none a clue to indicate where, or even why, your character chased this star. Lovingly written, I could feel it through every linguistic here.

Posted 12 Years Ago


You were called by true love. I guess.
Such a brilliant poem my friend, full of amazing lines.
I'm subscribing to you, to read soon more, and review soon better.

E.L.

Posted 12 Years Ago


Wow. That was amazing. I hope she loved it. She is very lucky to have you. I read what the other reviewers wrote and it's true, you are Romeo. I loved this. It drips with emotion and love for her.

Posted 12 Years Ago


Legolas

12 Years Ago

That must have been so nice.
Caradoc

12 Years Ago

I enjoyed it. I'll always remember that night.
Legolas

12 Years Ago

As I'm sure she will.
The first are always the best.
Excellent write.

Posted 13 Years Ago


First poem? wow. Wish I could say that. The beginning gave me chills-it was exquisite. I felt like it wasn't as good later on, still good, just not as.
Beuatiful word choice, nice flow, great job!

Posted 13 Years Ago



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Added on August 30, 2011
Last Updated on February 3, 2015


Author

Caradoc
Caradoc

Withered Wonderland



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