If I knew.

We learn too late to be quiet. Anger and violence leads only to more pain and sadness.

  If I knew
 
 If I knew.
 I would of  loved more and said less.
 
Sweet memories slip into my mind of us.
Two people loving and holding tight like it was our last moment.
 
I remember walking  hand in  hand with you.
On lonely beaches.
Never more happy.
 
 The sweet times are rare now.
 
 Eyes of youth had faded away with life burdens and losses.
 
 I look into the mirror and see a tire man.
 
 I wish to go back and feel again.
 To hunger for sweet  kisses and love til the morning light.
 
Walk down the naked beaches of Monterey coast.
In a mist of silence with a gentle hand in mine. 
 
 I didn't know laughter and dreams would fade away.
 
 If I knew I would of try to stop time.
 
 Hold you like you were my last breath.
 
                          John Castellenas
                            Coyote

Author's Note

Life is long and hard. My Grandfather told me along time ago. Nothing good to say. Say nothing. I tell my children the same.
Coyote

Reviews

[Nautili]

I love the vulnerability of this poem, you speak of naked beaches, and metaphorically your soul is naked in this poem. You admit you are tired, jaded, uninspired. I love when people are just real.
And you want to fix it, to change it, to feel the vitality of the relationship once again. You are not content to just let the passion dissolve into nothingness. Such an honest work.

[rosemary keogh]

Wow u have a nice way with words. Ur honest. Brought a tear to my eyes :)

[WhiteWillow]

So much wisdom in this poem. Sometimes memories of a past time leaving you wanting more. We must somehow learn to appreciate that which we have now, even if its different. Simply beautiful!

[EmeraldFacet]

This is a very touching piece. It takes enormous strength and great character to be this vulnerable, especially when you have others that look up to you. Your honest recount about life and your personal experiences makes you a greater inspiration to you're children than if you were to give off the impression of being perfect.
Striving to be perfect will not make the world a better place, however relaying the lessons learnt of our imperfections definitely will!!

Great poem Coyote
Best wishes,
EF

[anne p. murray- LadeeAn..]

This is such a touching poem, amongst so many of your touching sensitively written poems.
This one touches my heart with a reverberating beat of my own memories of
" I wish I had".
I guess we all could say. 'I wish", couldn't We?
Thank you for sharing this precious, valuable lesson.

[Coffee Vampier]

I really don't know what to say, you grasped the idea of this poem so well.
This is defiantly what speaks to my heart right now :)

[Rissa Nichole]

This is just wow... I am speechless. But this reminds me so much of my Nana and how she was after my grandpa had passed. This is really amazing :)

[Zeitgeist Manifesto]

This poem seems to have a setting of infinite space.
Having such an open feeling drives the emotion of
it all by making a person feel so small. The happy
memories provided safety and comfort. Feeling such
an enormous world encompassing the reader makes
the feeling of loss very heavy indeed.

[KATHY SUE SILLS]

I think a lot of us can relate to this poem! I agree with you: If you got nothing good to say. say nothing! This poem was something good to say!

[KAREN]

This holds true meaning for me! We all can learn from this well written poem!!

[Norma M Sutton]

My mom and grandmother said the same. This is sadly the truth. Very nice.