We can learn kindness from living and seeing hate and violence.
Father's eyes and anger
Is my Father's eyes and anger. Are they mine now?
I told you. I love you. I need you.
Love should bring calm and peace.
Violence. A hidden demon. Can strike without thought.
Sweet friend. Kind lover. Did you see the monster?
I tried to lock the demon up. He tried to escape.
I must walk away for a moment. Deep breathes and counting to ten.
My world is falling apart. Like my Father's world did. He took the bad road. Pissed off and violence.
I will keep quiet. Do my best to stay strong. Ain't easy when your world is falling down around you.
We need kind words. We need a lot of patience. A lot of love and forgiveness.
I will pray to the God of life and death Give me wisdom and strength.
Coyote 7 Feb 1989
My Father
When I look into the mirror. Do I see you my father?
Have I become what I despised all my life? Have my eyes. Your violence become mine?. Everyday I learn more loss. Loss of dreams. Lost of desires.
Will I become like you? Give up. Show spirit only when I'm violence or excited?
Can I stop my journey to man-hood? My eyes from hiding tears. Gentleness.
Have I travel too far? Is the blood too strong?
Am I destine to hurt everyone? I have loved.
If I chose my own road. Why do I follow my father sadness.
Coyote 27 April 1989
Sins of the fathers
My father fought in wars. Killed in battle that expanded to the real world.
He was a Mexican/Ojibwa man with no place to go. Hated for his color and race.
He demanded respect and never allow anyone to look down at him. His anger and violence controlled his mind and heart.
He told me. "You will get a education and make them respect you. I won't allow you to live my life."
My father watched me succeed. He told me often. "Don't allow my sins to become your sins. I have killed, done bad things. You must overcome the sins of your father."
Now I have lived a good life. "My father's sins made me go in the right direction. Sins of our father's need to teach us a better way."
He asks me once. "Remember son. You must pray for me. Children must pray for their parent to be allow to find peace."
I pray he is with his Soldier brother's in paradise. Drinking to a good day. I believe a kind God forgive the sins of men lost in the turmoil of hate and prejudice.
The sin of our father's must teach us the better road.
I've always had issues with my father but legally I cannot talk about that until my censorship ends in 2014. This really made me sit up and think about so many things.
Thank you ever so much for publishing this, very well written my friend :)
This is a perspective i don't often see in poetry. I feel like im looking into a life from a one sided mirror when i read this. It feels so personal it makes me fell uneasy, but that is what makes it so good.
"Sweet friend.
Kind lover.
Did you see the monster?"
I could write something off that small stanza alone and it has to be one of my favorite parts of this. Keep writing and best wishes
So much richness here of living and of loving... of a desire for a better life in the midst of a world so unkind.. so hateful at times.. May we all seek to find that better road and yes, to share it with our children and our children's children as well... Peace.
WE BECOME OUR THOUGHTS, IF WE CAN MANAGE TO FORGIVE LET GO, AND LET THE HEALING PROCESS BEGIN, WE HAVE WON, THAT BITTER BATTLE OF COLD RAGE, AND CAN BECOME A SOFTER NICER PERSON, WE HAVE TO BE ABLE TO FORGIVE OURSELVES BEFORE WE CAN FORGIVE OTHERS, A VERY GOOD WRITE MADE ME THINK A LOT, THANKYOU COYOTE, FOR SHARING YOUR POEM WITH US A BIG HUG FOR YOU mOONBEAM
Three fine and sincere poems from you, John .. each complimenting the other, like a painting gradully being put to canvas.
There's no doubt that we inherit traits, good and bad, from our parents .. in your case, perhaps, more so from your father. It happens, it's how it is. I guess you learned as we all should, that the best should never stay hidden.
Your dad knew his faults, his best trait was to give you some fine advice - his lesson learned, in that surely, he was a brave man.
Hopefully this repayment for all your kind comments is not too overdue :)
Your words expressed the fear and helplessness of becoming what you feared very well. While the first poems displayed a darker side of your relationship with your father, the third established the inner lining of love and protection. You showed how every relationship is two sided or not at simple as it seems.
Your use of question marks in the second poem gave a feeling of fear and self doubt that clearly displayed the meaning of the poem. I think structurally-wise, the first poem was my favorite, and meaning-wise the third was at the top.
Great job on all three :)
How true. We must learn from the sins of our fathers, and elders, but we must also learn from the good they did. There is a little good in the worst of us and a little bad in the best of us. All can be used as tools if we walk with straight eyes towards the Great Spirit. Well written
A Poet and writer who love to read and write.
My pleasure is reading about the bad and good in a life.
Also to honor the Poets/Writers of the past by reading their words.
Remember .. more..