Secret love and hidden memory

Someone today told me. Write a new poem. Here it is.

                         











 


















Secret love and hidden memory.

I saw her face today.
Made me wander back in time.
Each of us hold our Beatrice's near.
The writer holds on to memories like a drunkard holds on to his wine.

Do our memories become less with time?
Do innocent kisses and embraces of youth become sweeter with age?

Do dreams of beautiful brown eyed young woman leave your thoughts
and you become empty?

Can you escape the dance of long sweet kisses and yearning to touch
tender and warm flesh?

Age allowed us to ponder old memories.
Make us wished we held tighter and done more.

Beautiful faces dance in my head.
Old thoughts forgotten.
Rebirth to make me remember I loved a brown eye girl once.

                                     Coyote
                                     May2012

Author's Note

Any mistakes. Please assist a old Poet.

Reviews

[Liderien]

there is an s on "dances" third line from the bottom. it should either be danced or dance.

The line under the picture could be shortened to fit the poem better.
instead of
""The writer holds on to memories like a drunk holds on to his wine"
The writers hold to memories like a drunkard to his wine.

That is all my friend. Thank you sharing. It brings me great joy to read your writings.

[CHRIS ANDES]

a reminiscences, a dream and an admiration.
such a lovely poem.
thank you for the share.

[Coyote Poetry]

Thank you Christine. I appreciate the kind words.

[Ted Kniffen]

I wouldn't call it a mistake, but an adjustment. Combine the first two lines into one, lose the third line (the reference is vague) and tighten the fourth line to something like this "the writer holds to memories like a drunkard to his wine" This is a good poem, I liked it. Old people are not expected to have memories of love, but love we did. I loved a blue-eyed girl once and still see her face in my memory.
Thanks for the thoughts

[Coyote Poetry]

Thank you Ted. I appreciate the help and the comment. I will edit later. Just stopping in today.

[annalysiar]

Its good I like it😊 unfortunately when it comes to editing I need help too lol but it flows quite nicely

[Coyote Poetry]

Thank you for reading and the comment. Most of us need a editor. Hard to see our own mistakes.

[annalysiar]

Lol you're welcome

[Jazique]

Awe that is just too beautiful. I'm sorry I am not a better writer because I cannot identify any mistake. It took me a moment to find my flow with the poem, the words by the picture threw me off but, as I continued you captured me with the words. Makes me think you should have entered my Memory contest I had made a while back. Anyways well done.

[Coyote Poetry]

The lake was in Germany. Where my first love and I met in 1977. The poem was about her. Things missed become more precious with time and separation.

[Jazique]

It's usually the case for anything to grow more preciou with time and separation. Relationships, Artist, Shows, Family Members, Friendships, and more. Makes me think of the song "let her go" by passenger.

[Ian Faraway]

I understand all too well the feeling of memories when we're with the ones we so desire. However I have yet to steal an innocent kiss in this youth from her soft lips nor see affection in her brown eyes. J'adore!

[Coyote Poetry]

Thank you Ian. I appreciate the comment.

[Becky C Strukamp]

coyote, you are a master of writing poems of love, yet another beautifully crafted write. Your memories of love are so endearing to ones heart. Thanks again for sharing your memories.

[Mark]

"The writer holds on to memories like a drunkard holds on to his wine."

My sisters often are surprised at my memories. To me, it's like drinking water; something to do to cure a thirst. Our memories may not be completely accurate, but they are what we want to remember.

[Mark]

The writer holds to memories like a drunkard holds on to his wine is a really great line. One of your best I think. It also works really well with the line following it and I think you might try structuring the poem around that seed. The next line doesn't really fit with the rhythm and flow that those two lines generated quite nicely.

[CHRIS ANDES]

your a very good writer

[Kena Dawn Augustine]

beautiful, one of my favorites so far. Very romantic and loving.