The Echo of You

for Tiffini

 

 

There’s something I don’t think you know

I hate to cry, I hate to show

Anything that makes me weak

And so I shout when I should speak

 

But I loved that little shadow of you

Not knowing if you were "pink" or "blue"

And I believed that you would be

A precious echo, an echo of me

 

Thumbing fondly through memories

You’re running through sprinklers and climbing trees

Making pancakes on a stool

Picking out your clothes for school

 

An armful of dollies with silly names

A treasure trunk of ghosts and games

That “Little Tiffi” loves to play

Watching your tricycle ride away

 

 Now I’m haunted by memories

Of purple hair and obscenities

Wondering if I’m breaking some rule

By being glad that you’re at school

 

There’s something you don’t think I know

You hate to cry, you hate to show

Anything that makes you weak

And so you shout when you should speak

 

But you are no shadow, you’re a flame

And as you scream, “That’s not my name!”

I know my Little Tiffi’s gone

What the Hell did I do wrong?

 

Someday I’ll miss the purple hair

I’ll look in your room, but you won’t be there

Memories fading and emptiness due

Just a precious echo, the echo of you

Reviews

[Cari Lynn Vaughn]

I totally get this poem since I have a daughter too. You imagine them as little version of yourself, but they grow to be so independent so quickly. You love them no matter what, but there is some sadness connected to both who they were and who they are and who they will be. It is an acceptance and a loss at that same time. That sublime emotion is beautifully expressed here. Great job!

[DiMar4u]

solid.

[DiMar4u]

I have a strained relationship.with my parents....this is a very emotional piece for me. Thanks again-still so poignant.

[DiMar4u]

how incredibly visceral, i read it several times....i'm still stirred by thoughts it provoked--thanks for share'n!

[DiMar4u]

that totally engaged me,
powerful writing.
:O )~

[EverEmma]

I love this poem very very much. I have no children as I am a young girl. But I have very strong motherly instincts. My eyes well up with tears as I read this. The child whom you hugged, the child whom you gave birth to, the child who's boo-boos you kissed, is leaving. Your echo is leaving.

[Emily]

This is an absolutely beautiful piece. I cannot begin to understand this feeling b/c I do not yet have children of my own. Well written, the emotions and the wording are portrayed perfectly through this entire piece. I got sucked into it, and it was as though I could not manage to stop reading. Best of Luck, and well done!

[Antonio Valentino]

Oh my gosh, Charlotte, this one made my heart cringe, and I had to hold back some rain in the ending. Simply beautiful, it all really goes so fast doesn't it? You're a great mommy, your daugher and you are lucky to have each other.
Thanks for sharing this with us.

Antonio

[Natalie]

Thanks. I'm glad you liked it.

And I wrote it for my daughter.