As I Lay on the Couch of a Million Feathers

for those who love the feeling of butterflies.

It's like the scent of perfume that causes you to reminisce-

"Lightning Crashes," and the candlelight incandescence.

My eyes zoomed in like a camera lens,

My attention focused in.

I listened as the wind blew through the door,

As it brushed its way passed the leaves

And carried the tune his fingers played amongst the chords.

 

I lay on the couch of a million feathers,

Trying not to stare over to my right too much,

So I wouldn't disturb the "stranger" with the serenading voice.

His voice is one you can trust,

Igniting the depths of my soul to be freed.

His music- a product of peace and

ecstatic energy when they combust.

Ridding my heart of all other needs.

 

It's the song from that day-

That reminds me of feeling that certain way.

 

Reviews

[x]

Your similes are good, and I found reading this a lot of fun. You describe the feelings of being intensely focused, but still drifting along, almost-nervous really well. I think the beginning could be a little stronger, it doesn't flow very well, but the idea behind it is very good. It's pretty coherent, you sort of slide from perfume, to the wind carrying smells, and brushing past leaves, to the sound travelling, and then feathers. I think it can be improved slightly, but I liked it, send me a read request any time.