UNTITLED T

UNTITLED T

A Poem by Judas Hammer
"

Street Prose

"

 

Untitled T

 

Butterflies lead the revolt.

While the moths stood by with their hands in pocket.

Cats and mice are on the same team.

As the dogs plot to divide them.

Why do I stutter when I speak a word with Vs?

A young man walks with old mans shoes.

While middle aged women play bingo with cards from younger days.

I dance a dance of life.

While more graceful men are dying.

 

© 2008 Judas Hammer


Author's Note

Judas Hammer
Might be too much in my own head

My Review

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Reviews

Very good illustration of parallel metaphors and your own personification of allegorys, that touch on universal truths. Your refelctions in your words show a great ability to write with vision.
Thank you for sharing this poem.

Anne

Posted 12 Years Ago


I think there's a deeper commentary here than what's just going on in your head. I felt confusion, frustration, longing, and a great sense of burden when reading this. You marvelously wove all that together to create a real gem that definitely got my wheels turning. Awesome!

Posted 12 Years Ago


I think its much more....the people fighting....the person admiring life and taking it head on......much more than in the own head lol Excellent xx

Posted 12 Years Ago


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Eve
Once again, a beautifully imagitve world you'd created with simple words.

Posted 12 Years Ago


Wow, this one really got me going. Thanks for entering the contest, and best of luck in the voting!

jkb

Posted 15 Years Ago



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426 Views
15 Reviews
Shelved in 1 Library
Added on May 6, 2008

Author

Judas Hammer
Judas Hammer

The City of Angeles, CA



About
I like to write, live in La and write and make short films. and more..

Writing