The Last Call

The Last Call

A Poem by Crazy Cat Man
"

A poem about the last call at bars. On how we need the last call so the night cannot go on forever

"
The Last Call
You're trying to luck out
To find a hot babe
Instead you're striking out
You see a hot lady
You hope to take her home maybe
So you say what's up baby
She laughs and walks away
You better hurry up
You're time is almost up
Your tab is about to be closed
You're looking for other hoes
But they have no interest in you
You might as well look at porn at RedTube
The Last Call is great
Cuz theres a timeline to get laid
If you can't get a girl by 2 A.M.
Then call it a night then
If she's still talking
Then it's time to get the walking
But you're patient
So now you're stalking
You want to walk her home
In hopes that you can bone
You offer so she won't walk alone
You want the digits to her cellphone
Oh no she want's to go to another bar
You don't want to go there at all
She's pushing it too far
Damn now you have to pay for another drink
While she talks about her shrink
You just want to get into her sink
But she's not interested
She just wants to talk
While you're ready to balk
Now she's talking about her aunt
OK you had enough
Say goodnight hun
You're done
This is why we have the last call
No time to stall
You have reached your time limit
She didn't come with it
So you blaze up
And get livid

© 2012 Crazy Cat Man


Author's Note

Crazy Cat Man

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Featured Review

A deliciously clever piece of social commentary...my last calls have been downgraded to no calls thanks to my self-imposed boycott of clubs...being one who can't do so much as sample alcohol cuz of a health condition, clubs are absolutely useless to me, in fact I resent them to an extent...I don't care what anyone says, if you're gonna go to a club with no intention of taking at least one drink, there's no point in going...and I can only really "blaze" at home so why bother haha

Posted 11 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.




Reviews

Loved it man and hey this really connects for me dam fine work stay crazy and cheers Gonzo

Posted 11 Years Ago


This ritual doesn't seem to have changed much over the last forty or fifty years.
An amusing account, Craze!

Posted 11 Years Ago


A deliciously clever piece of social commentary...my last calls have been downgraded to no calls thanks to my self-imposed boycott of clubs...being one who can't do so much as sample alcohol cuz of a health condition, clubs are absolutely useless to me, in fact I resent them to an extent...I don't care what anyone says, if you're gonna go to a club with no intention of taking at least one drink, there's no point in going...and I can only really "blaze" at home so why bother haha

Posted 11 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

you need to perform poetry

Posted 11 Years Ago


Crazy Cat Man

11 Years Ago

I do, :P did u see the video?
eglantine

11 Years Ago

... i don't think so... but then again, i have a terrible memory and have been ridiculously busy lat.. read more
Hahaha ohhh the joys of RedTube. One of my favorites....

Anywhoo... O.o .... I liked it a lot. It wasn't as sarcastic as some of your other pieces but a lovely addition to the 'dating' collection. ;)

Posted 11 Years Ago


That_Girl

11 Years Ago

RedTube is probably my fav yeah. YouPorn isn't bad either
Faffy

11 Years Ago

i still prefer your writing avy =P
That_Girl

11 Years Ago

...OH! Hahahaha thanks. ;)
It's a cute poem. I like the rhyming and it's typical subject matter for cat man. A fun little read.

Posted 11 Years Ago


One word for this dilema: Hooker

Posted 11 Years Ago


[send message][befriend] Subscribe
Ees
Funny thing you have here.
I'd like to see some breaks- stanzas here, to let the lines and humor sink in a bit. You took last call to a very funny place. I tend to see last call differently, but then again, I'm not one for having any fun with men I meet in bars... haha, and I tend bar, so last call is usually about scooting the idiots out the door, cleaning up, relaxing for a minute and turning out the lights, checking to make sure all of the doors are locked and going home. haha.

this one isn't my favorite of yours, but I can't deny the humor and the concept reminds me of something my friend Jarraj would go on about, he talks about getting dates and time frames and stuff like that a lot and it is always hilarious when he does, so that it reminds me of Jarraj, maybe endears me to this poem more than I otherwise would have.

Hahah, good job. `

Posted 11 Years Ago


Crazy Cat Man

11 Years Ago

Laughs are unpredictable. I read poems for different audiences. The response is always different. :P
Crazy Cat Man

11 Years Ago

lol im actually writing a new poem that has stanzas lol its not becuz u said i should do it. its bec.. read more
Ees

11 Years Ago

haha.
That's totally fair and I would expect nothing less than doing it on your own, not becau.. read more
You know, I feel a need to counter this poem with one of my own ;-)

You want to know what last call is like for US???

*laugh* Really fun write, Cat Man Do...loved it.

Posted 11 Years Ago


KAOlmsted

11 Years Ago

Okay...I think I went off on a bit of a tangent that really has nothing to do with countering your p.. read more
KAOlmsted

11 Years Ago

...and I just watched the video... :-D
Ees

11 Years Ago

I have been contemplating doing a response, but I don't know how to think like that, or have that ty.. read more

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505 Views
9 Reviews
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Shelved in 1 Library
Added on November 6, 2012
Last Updated on November 6, 2012
Tags: last call, bar, laid, conversation, sex, home, weed

Author

Crazy Cat Man
Crazy Cat Man

New York, NY



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