Burnt Cracked Wobbly

Burnt Cracked Wobbly

A Poem by DAH
"

the darkness does not shock me

"

 

Above the sky
even farther
something isolated
worn out and old

I raise my eyes
to that which passes
from one year to another
from death to death

The stars seem worn out
their cogs,
burnt, cracked
and wobbling

I make my way like a horse
with one shoe
the darkness
does not shock me

My fear is an empty seed
but my shadow is exhausted:
there is no distance greater
than my life

Time hands us a speed trap
a flash of breath, of body
of earth’s blood
blackened by our presence

but I’m telling you nothing
about this life or about
the geometric majesty
of the universe    

For now, there will be the seasons:
April’s nubile fragrance,
the fat heat of August,

fall and winter’s landslides of beauty



====================================


from my unpublished manuscript: inheritance


©dah / dahlusion 2018 all rights reserved


first published in Amethyst Review (UK)

© 2019 DAH


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Featured Review

Your work is energizing to read poet to poet. Precision would be my one word description. I love the images/ and mood in this. The carefulness with which I'd wager you crafted it. That last stanza in particular -- your descriptions (April, August) -- are inspired.

Looking forward to exploring your poems in greater depth when I have some time to spend on them. Nice to meet you, DAH.

Posted 1 Year Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

DAH

1 Year Ago

Thank you, Eilis, and I'm honored that this poem has moved you to write this fine critique.
<.. read more



Reviews

"The stars seem worn out their cogs, burnt, cracked and wobbling" I love how you worded that.



Posted 1 Year Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

DAH

1 Year Ago

Thank you, Scarlet, I'm happy that it stirred up some good feelings for you. Thanks for the comment!.. read more
Those wobbly cogs and that hobbley gait. create consummate choreographic canters that even in the darkness cannot be obscured. I once wrote a song actually it was my first song about "you are dancing in the darkness.... memorizing steps on turn" (before Bruce stole my line:) the gist of that line is walking thru life unawares just following orders etc... you are dancing in the darknesss to your own light my friend and your choreography is placed immemorial into your poetry. why the hell would you be afraid of death your permanently affixed in verse keep the burning

Posted 1 Year Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

DAH

1 Year Ago

A fine comeback. Congrats on the first song.

Thank you, Robert
Robert Trakofler

1 Year Ago

oh i wrote that song back in 1981 I don't think i can remember most of it anymore:)
DAH

1 Year Ago

... none-the-less, it's still a song, somewhere
Questions of Life...death...and the Hereafter...if it exists
The myth is ancient...once believed but now struck down by the religion of science...we can tell people the story but will they believe.
In the end we have this life and that is enough.

A good write, DAH

Posted 1 Year Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

DAH

1 Year Ago

Thank you, Ted
There are so many great lines that add, layer by layer, towards the faults and flaws we are surrounded by, but rarely question just how dysfunctional this crazy thing called life is, but my favourite, the one that truly resonates with me is, "there is no distance greater than my life." Until you said it, I guess I had never looked at the bigger picture in full, but now you have, I find myself wondering how I never saw it. How could there be anything we could measure more? Makes perfect sense now.
The last verse stands out also, with acceptance that there is beauty and wonder to be found, if we break it down to smaller parts.
Love the dystopia feel to this, with shades of hope that there will be more to come, and maybe learn.

Posted 1 Year Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

DAH

1 Year Ago

Yes, the distance that we travel ... yes, the greatest of all. Happy to read that this one resonates.. read more
Indeed is appears the protagonist does not fear death and accepts that the universe and life moves on and grinds its way perhaps to the demise of mankind. Love the allegories in this and the descriptions in a well crafted free verse.

Posted 1 Year Ago


DAH

1 Year Ago

Thank you, John, glad it resonates
Like a Kilroy - I paused here
Eyes held aloft by finger(s')tips
"Nice garden."

Posted 1 Year Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

DAH

1 Year Ago

Thank you for the read and for the encouraging words
Chris

1 Year Ago

Paralleled paths - giving 3d perceptions... an in-body experience.
Your work is energizing to read poet to poet. Precision would be my one word description. I love the images/ and mood in this. The carefulness with which I'd wager you crafted it. That last stanza in particular -- your descriptions (April, August) -- are inspired.

Looking forward to exploring your poems in greater depth when I have some time to spend on them. Nice to meet you, DAH.

Posted 1 Year Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

DAH

1 Year Ago

Thank you, Eilis, and I'm honored that this poem has moved you to write this fine critique.
<.. read more
A great description of Entropy encroaching as the Universe, slowly grinds to a halt, cogs burnt cracked and wobbly, good poem

Posted 1 Year Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

DAH

1 Year Ago

Thank you, gram!

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9 Reviews
Shelved in 1 Library
Added on August 11, 2019
Last Updated on August 13, 2019
Tags: dah, dahlusion, wordslinger, surreal, poem, author, universe

Author

DAH
DAH

CA



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I don't respond to Read Requests: critique my work and I'll critique yours. It's that simple. Ninth poetry collection is SPHERICAL (Argotist Press, 2019), with poems published by editors from the .. more..

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A Poem by DAH