Yard Sale

Yard Sale

A Poem by DAH
"

the endless mandible chatter

"

 

There’s a spy within me

tapped into suspicions

one eye zeroed in

round the clock

 

There’s a ward

of smuggled wounds

convalescing in my notebooks

smudged so badly

that only I can decipher

their blood

 

I wake early

before family commotion starts

before the endless

mandible chatter

rips apart the silence

 

because my mind is groggy

standing before sunrise

because birds flutter

in such a manner

that my center loses grounding

 

My eyes are sky

pulled from my brain

fog stuffs my head

I’m an old basement

damp and dripping

 

Maybe a yard sale is in order

to rid myself

these shabby feelings

================================

 

 from my 6th book: The Opening

©dah / dahlusion / CTU 2018 all rights reserved

first published in Chicago Record Magazine

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

© 2019 DAH


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Featured Review

love the metaphors....the old basement damp and dripping...the yard sale idea....
i have need to have a few of those...but i probably couldn't give away 90% of the shabby feelings i have stored in the attic of my mind.
really good poetry here...fresh language and word play.
j.

Posted 6 Months Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

DAH

6 Months Ago

Thank you, jacob, for this wonderful feedback ...



Reviews

wow...great read for me...especially relate to it as several days ago i awoke with a start from some screaming dream that contractured my arms and i felt as tho i surely did a whole body lift from the bed .. my center has been a struggle since .. i hate it ... if only a yard sale would do the trick eh!?
metaphors are fresh and street nitty gritty in them says i! glad i stopped by .. saw a review you did on a poem and had not visited your place yet .. fine read for me!
E.

Posted 3 Months Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

DAH

3 Months Ago

Thank you, E!
Really like your ideas here. An inner spy 24/7 sounds like big brother's moved in. 'I' m an old basement, damp and dripping', that's a great metaphor for feeling your age and well below par. A yard sale for getting rid of shabby feelings. If I did that there wouldn't be any buyers and not likely any takers for free either, but I love that idea. I enjoyed where you took me with your lines. Wonderful poetry DAH.

Chris

Posted 5 Months Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

DAH

5 Months Ago

I'm happy that it resonates, Christine, and thank you
for this fine comment.

C.. read more
Wow... this is definitely a new favorite for me. I love, love, love the imagery in this piece and how, despite it not being overly complex, it pulls you into a world that the reader can look through with the writer's eyes - I can visualize wooden beams and open windows to foggy mornings, the air humid and soothing to the skin, the creak of stairs and the humming of the wind and the chirping of birds... It feels like the entire poem is the embodiment of taking in a deep breath and letting it out in a sigh, a sigh that says, "In a moment I will be unhappy, but for now, I am content." Beautiful work DAH, I absolutely adore this!

Some of my favorite lines:

"smudged so badly / that only I can decipher"

"because birds flutter / in such a manner / that my center loses grounding"

"My eyes are sky / pulled from my brain / fog stuffs my head / I’m an old basement / damp and dripping"

The lines above really caught my eye specifically - and before I forget I'd like to ask you something! I'm planning on getting my arms tattooed with sleeves of lyrics and poetry, so that I can carry my favorite and the most inspirational lines/lyrics with me throughout the rest of my life... Would it bother you at all if I got "because birds flutter / in such a manner / that my center loses grounding" tattooed on one of the sleeves? I'd give credit of course, but I won't plan on it until I have your blessing. Those lines just speak out to me. :)

Posted 5 Months Ago


DAH

5 Months Ago

I'm flattered, to say the least, seriously flattered by your heavenly words.

Yes, th.. read more
It is an interesting thought process you have put down. I will say that shabby feelings are usually free and are the kind of things people can't give away and end up as trash on the side of the road. I really like the way you built this up with each cascading stanza and the final product is nothing I would sell. It's great work, DAH! See ya around.

Posted 6 Months Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

DAH

6 Months Ago

I really like this critique, CD, thank you for this compliment.

Cheers,
DAH
Your poem is fresh & startling with relatable imagery. The second verse is so powerful . . . all those notebooks . . . what to do with them? The detritus of a writer's ponderings. Here in agricultural areas where Hispanics are plentiful, I have a habit of putting my junk out front with a "FREE" sign & it's usually gone the next day. Which brings me to Jacob's stabbing commentary, which I relate to, since I've got nuttin' that's worth nuttin'! Palpable feelings of wasted time (((HUGS))) Fondly, Margie

Posted 6 Months Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

DAH

6 Months Ago

Somebody's junk turning into somebody's else's gold. Happy to read that this piece resonates, barley.. read more
What a vivid description of a writer’s torture, being trapped in our dungeon of thoughts, regrets, etc. Best to keep writing, sir, and rid yourself of all that junk. And, remember... sometimes there’s treasure in those yard sales.

Posted 6 Months Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

DAH

6 Months Ago

I love this perspective of yours. Thank you for stopping by!
yard sale,i`m not sure it will work,but a great write

Posted 6 Months Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

DAH

6 Months Ago

Yes, they are a toss in the air.

Thank you!
 wordman

6 Months Ago

you`re welcome
[send message][befriend] Subscribe
Vin
metaphorical. I think you should keep experimenting- cos you're too good so far!

Posted 6 Months Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

DAH

6 Months Ago

Thank you, Vin!
I am a morning person myself, for those same reasons. I require the serenity of silence that comes before the world wakes, just beneath the dawn. Feelings are such a fickle and ever changing thing aren't they...
Nicely written, I like the imagery.

Posted 6 Months Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

DAH

6 Months Ago

I'm glad that you are feeling this one.
Yes, to just before the dawn.

Thank yo.. read more

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Added on August 17, 2019
Last Updated on August 17, 2019

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DAH
DAH

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I don't respond to Read Requests: critique my work and I'll critique yours. It's that simple. Ninth poetry collection is SPHERICAL (Argotist Press, 2019), with poems published by editors from the .. more..

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