The Day She Died

The Day She Died

A Poem by Dan Ryoma

I didn't cry the day she died.
I didn't dine the day she died.
I didn't feel the day she died.
I didn't fear the day she died.
I didn't drink the day she died.
I didn't think the day she died.

I tried and tried the day she died.
I dialed and dialed the day she died.
I compressed fifteen the day she died.
I tried alone the day she died.

I waited so long the day she died.
I kneeled so long the day she died.
I watched them crowd the day she died.
I sat alone the day she died.

I didn't stop breathing the day she died.
I didn't stop wanting the day she died.
I didn't stop loving the day she died.
I didn't stop remembering the day she died.

© 2011 Dan Ryoma


My Review

Would you like to review this Poem?
Login | Register




Featured Review

There's an interesting balance of sadness, remembrance, and intensity about the way this is written. The repetition of "the/that day (that) she died" really emphasizes the subject's struggle with a tragedy. The grouping of the verses adds a level of... how to say... "hurriedness", almost as if remembering what happened is causing his/her thoughts to race.

This is a wonderful work. Very powerful.

Posted 14 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.




Reviews

This was interesting. It goes from being sad to being bitter it seems at the end. Nice Poem.

Posted 14 Years Ago


The tone's sort of indifferent at first, like the narrator's trying not to be fazed in the slightest, but then a touch of bitterness, even sadness and regret registers near the end of the write.



Posted 14 Years Ago


[send message][befriend] Subscribe
bbb
This is a piece full of mixed emotions and actions, all the effects of death on the writer. I like how it repeats to drive the point home. Nice work!

Posted 14 Years Ago


There's an interesting balance of sadness, remembrance, and intensity about the way this is written. The repetition of "the/that day (that) she died" really emphasizes the subject's struggle with a tragedy. The grouping of the verses adds a level of... how to say... "hurriedness", almost as if remembering what happened is causing his/her thoughts to race.

This is a wonderful work. Very powerful.

Posted 14 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Woah, that was intense!
Sad, and selfish I guess :/
But overall a great poem! :)

Posted 14 Years Ago


Wow, very deep stuff right here. Great job!

Posted 14 Years Ago



Share This
Email
Facebook
Twitter
Request Read Request
Add to Library My Library
Subscribe Subscribe


Stats

214 Views
6 Reviews
Rating
Added on May 12, 2010
Last Updated on April 15, 2011

Author

Dan Ryoma
Dan Ryoma

CA



About
I haven't been writing recreationally for very long. I am curious to see what strangers think. I appreciate any critiques you can give and will happily return the favor. more..

Writing
Emily Emily

A Story by Dan Ryoma


Ads Ads

A Story by Dan Ryoma