Lost amongst the stars

Please, don't see

Just a boy trapped in a cruel reality

Because we all know the heart needs

At least a little fantasy

Can you look past all these scars?

Because I can't so far

As I've become lost amongst the stars

Oh God, why is it we sometimes die young

And spend the rest of our lives on the run

With life feeling like one big pun?

Please, forgive me

But lately all I can see

Is I gave up all my love

And it was devoured by a vicious dove

How is it our best memories bring me sorrow?

Yet I still dream about tomorrow

Will I keep feeding you lies like a joke?

Till the day you finally choke

They say all you need is the blood of a lamb

Yet here I am

Living in this new culture

Where the pieces of my heart are circling vultures

So can you look past these scars?

Because no matter how far

I've become lost amongst the stars

Looking for a way to illuminate the dark

Since I've clearly missed the mark

Author's Note

To be honest, I am not 100% sure what this poem is about. It just sort of came out :P (and the misspelling of among was on purpose)

Reviews

[Riley Justine]

I like how the message of this poem isn't clear. You can kind of interpret it how you wish. It's an amazing little piece here :) Good job Danny

[NoelHC]

Another good one. I do not believe "amongst" is a misspelling of "among" BTW, it is a real word.

[Dannyisawriter]

I wasn't sure when I wrote it. Thanks, now I know :)

[Benedict Mdluli]

hmmmm nice very tantalizing I could read it all night!!!

[MomzillaNC]

It's hard to find your way in life and in spiritual growth. Just remember, your eyes face the same direction as your toes for a reason. Your eyes were placed in a head that sits upon a neck that turn so you can see where you've been and learn from the past behind you. But, we're meant to keep looking forward so we can navigate our now.

We can't change the past, but we can learn from it and make our present a time of growth for a better future.

[Dannyisawriter]

Haha I really liked that metaphor or whatever it'd be technically called (the part about your eyes facing the same way as your toes)!!!! I'll have to remember that :) And thanks for the great advice Momzilla :D

[MomzillaNC]

It's something I say to my husband and my son quite a bit too. I also paraphrase a quote I've forgotten the origin of, "The past is done. The Future is yet to be. Now is where we live."

[Matching Socks]

It feels like someone has been hurt and feels completely lost now and trying to find his/her way, and hoping to find some guidance. Good one danny

[Dannyisawriter]

Haha thanks so much :)

[Cool Girl]

I really like it! I don't know why, but it makes me think of the book called Harold and the Purple Crayon. This poem of yours is quite beautiful in my opinion. It has a bit of uncertainty, as if the person lost is wondering around aimlessly searching for a path that leads to some other destination. As if they have gone down so many wrong paths that they almost want to give up, but know they must find the right one in order to survive. "Lost among the stars." I like that line because the sky is full of stars. There are so many stars that it all gets so confusing and can be misleading. Someone once told me that the stars are our ancestors and passed loved ones watching over us. In that case, the line could be interpreted as the person being lost within their past, unable to move on from their lost loved ones. Maybe they need to find a path back to reality, back to the present.

Sorry for the long review xD
It's the longest review I've ever written on someones poem..
Thank you for sharing your poem with me. It was a pleasure to read:)

[Dannyisawriter]

Thank you so much! LOL I think you enlightened me to the very meaning of my own poem haha! (I actually forgot to put a part of the poem in though haha! I just realized that after reading it again!)

[Cool Girl]

xD I'm glad you liked my reveiw LOL