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Trapped Within

Trapped Within

A Poem by DarkRainbowPie
"

I've heard one too many stories on the news about sex offenders lately and when I started writing tonight, it ended up becoming my theme.

"
Caught and bound within his web;
Nowhere to run, nowhere to hide.
You're trapped. And you're all alone.
You want to cry, but you can't.

He's edging closer, there's no escape,
How did you wind up here?
You turned your back, let your guard down.
Now he's gripped on to your fear.

You scream, you shout, you call for help.
You desperately wish to be found.
But...if a tree falls miles from nowhere,
Does it really make a sound?

It's dark, remote; the dead of night,
No one can help you now.
He holds you tight, you close your eyes

You're breathing, but you've already drowned.

© 2013 DarkRainbowPie


Author's Note

DarkRainbowPie
Started writing this without a theme in mind, all feedback is greatly appreciated!

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Reviews

such poetry! This is poetry in motion. There are a couple of lines where the musicality doesn't stress the more advisable word (at least how I found myself reading it), but that's a very unimportant factor, for the poem itself actually compensates for that by having such juicy lines - I am in awe! Your themes are profound, your imagery is strong, your construction is divine. And what's more, you pull off the feat of writing poetry (referring to all that I have read so far) that doesn't have every single possible line rhyming. You have full rhymes at end points, and also assonance rhymes midway when an end rhyme could not otherwise be placed, and because the musicality is so finely tuned......Brava! Well freaking done!

Posted 1 Year Ago


"It's dark, remote; the dead of night,
No one can help you now.
He holds you tight, you close your eyes"

A dark but true reality in our world. You give us signs and warnings. Bravo...............


Posted 4 Years Ago


DarkRainbowPie

4 Years Ago

Thank you very much for the kind review. Yes, sadly this is a real issue, and it cannot be tackled d.. read more
Sami Khalil

4 Years Ago

Good step in the right direction. You are welcome...:)...................
You're wording is as good as always and the the theme is very well worked on, it's a very good piece. But you need to get the flow of the poem better, it needs to be more fluid, butnother than thta it is a very good piece :) well done Little Mayo :)

Posted 6 Years Ago


DarkRainbowPie

4 Years Ago

Thank you Cathal :) I'd like to point out though that the lack of fluidity hopefully should represen.. read more

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367 Views
3 Reviews
Rating
Added on September 30, 2013
Last Updated on September 30, 2013
Tags: attack, abuse, rape, fear, screaming, death, offender, criminal, crime, victim

Author

DarkRainbowPie
DarkRainbowPie

Dublin, Ireland



About
Hey there, guys. My name's Annie, I'm 18, from Ireland. All there is to really know about me is that I am a MASSIVE nerd (...would like to wager that I actually do live and breathe science at .. more..

Writing