The Battling Ghosts

‘You have to come up to the house,’ she said,

‘I hate to be there at night,

I have two ghosts in the old bedposts

And each of them wants to fight,

They make their way to the kitchen there

And clatter the pots and pans,

The woman ghost is a Gretel, and

The masculine ghost is Hans.’

 

I said, ‘You must be imagining,

There’s not a ghost you can see,’

‘Well, I’ve got two and I’m telling you

I see, believe you me!

The guy is a cranky, violent fool,

He must have been bad in life,

While she defends herself with a stool

Each time that he beats his wife.’

 

The house was Gothic and Romanesque

And leaned out over the street,

It had an arch like a gothic church

With an overhead retreat.

And that’s where she kept the poster bed

Where the ghosts, she said, reside,

‘They can’t come out in the light of day

So they go in there to hide.’

 

We spent the evening playing cards

To wait for the witching hour,

Sat in our coats to await the ghosts

And their ectoplasmic shower,

‘It often gets messy,’ Cassandra said,

‘At the point they first appear,

They give out this vapour in the air,

A bit like the froth on beer.’

 

It must have been eleven o’clock

When Cassandra fell asleep,

I thought I could see her nodding off

Though her eyes began to peep,

Each nostril gave out a pale white smoke

And it formed on left and right,

One was Gretel and one was Hans

And it gave me quite a fright.

 

It didn’t take them a moment then,

She screamed and he would bawl,

He beat her with a broom handle and

Then pinned her against the wall,

She kicked him fair in the shins and ran

Right out of the room in there,

I watched him yell as he followed her

Down by the kitchen stair.

 

And then there was a clatter of pans

A noise like you’ve never heard,

They threw them around the kitchen

Until Gretel was calling ‘Merde!’

I tried to rouse Cassandra, who

Was groggy, but still awake,

I said, ‘You’ll have to be exorcised,’

And watched her begin to shake.

 

‘They may have been in the bedposts when

You came, I’m sure that’s true,

But maybe they found a better place

For now they live in you.’

I told her the ectoplasm formed

From her, and from whence it came,

She covered her mouth and nose and said,

‘They’ll never get back again!’

 

When daylight dawned in that gothic house

And the sun came shining in,

The ghosts came back to the bedroom and

They paid for their ghostly sin,

Cassandra fended them off until

They both were shouting, ‘Merde!’

Until the light had destroyed them with

A scream that you should have heard.

 

There’s not been a ghost in that gothic house

From then until this day,

I’m visiting still with Cassandra and

We’ve found a game to play,

It has to do with that poster bed

With its polished, wooden posts,

But the one thing that we’re certain of,

We’ll never be seen by ghosts.

 

David Lewis Paget

Reviews

[David Lewis Paget]

This isn't a free feed, folks. If you read my work, how about a review. As I write, there have been 35 views, and not one single review. You should all be ashamed of yourselves. On one other recent poem there were 105 views and just one review. Be prepared to pay your dues on copyright works, not with cash, but with comments. That's only fair.

[TPK Stories]

I thought this was going to be about the fairytale Hansel and Gretel...loved how you put ghosts into the mix. Well written David.

[Confuser]

David: Oh my David, I am so sorry no one has read this wonderful poem. I must say I enjoyed it as I do all your work. You made me laugh out loud: and I don't wish to give it away, but what a wonderful twist. You're writing is always fun, unique and fabulous. I'm sorry I haven't been able to review more; I have over 600 requests, and only so much time. I also was gone for awhile. I'm certainly not worrying about anybody reading mine, but people are missing out by not reading yours. Thanks again. You've written another outstanding poem. Dale

[Lyndy]

This is a nice poem, I thoroughly enjoyed it! :D

[Lady Lola]

Beautiful as ever. What a lovely amorous conclusion. Also, you know Hänsel und Gretel! I guess that makes sense; the Brothers Grimm's tales were quite -- well -- grim. And you seem to like the obscure and dark; as do I by the way.

[Valentine]

Another surprise tale with a bewitching ending. Your ideas come from olden times and I really like the gothic tales. Valentine

[R Smith]

I really like this one its fun as well as scary, you've hit a really scary patch of late David and i'm a big fan for sure, the best bit i like about this one though is after all the ghosts and exorcism the main characters find love among the bedposts! Brilliant!! :)

[emmajoy]

' We spent the evening playing cards - To wait for the witching hour, - Sat in our coats to await the ghosts - And their ectoplasmic shower, - ‘It often gets messy,’ Cassandra said, - ‘At the point they first appear, - They give out this vapour in the air, - A bit like the froth on beer. ’

What kind of mind couples 'heard' with 'merde.'..!!!! Adventurous bi-linguals, sir!

Love the feel of this mix of Gothic goings-on, nursery rhyme, romance and more. As ever your running meter equals your flair for telling a tale, you start, you finish, exciting and intriguing the reader betwixt times I so often get the impression that you fall for your characters cos they seem so very real.. and what's more, their dialogue romps

As always you more than delight and interest this reviewer.

Te. those who pop in and run? They can only focus for a minute, the attention span drops to zero after that.. sad.. they miss so much.

[Barbz]

What a relief to be able to have those pesky ghosts exorcised.....how frightening it must have been, that ectoplasmic experience!! New games and new experiences in that polished poster bed, seems like a lovely beginning.....refreshing, in fact, from some of your well-known and loved endings. And speaking to that, I read YOUR review and totally agree with you. I can't imagine reading your poetry and not responding with even a few words.....(can't imagine it would be anything but Praise).....it's a Respect thing! The Artist is inspired by the audience reaction.....Thank You, Barbz

[Marie]

So Cassandra was a medium...?

I knew vampires could be excorcised by sunlight, but not ghosts. These seemed to be quite evil ghosts, however, and that may be why the light worked.Then again, they do sound somewhat like poltergeists...

I'm glad these two found an even better game to play than cards.

Coincidence: I'm writing a book called "Cassandra," about a girl with great powers; however I'm trying not to stress the supernatural angle...

[Ovi-Odiete]

This is beautiful
Nicely penned
I will read more of ur work