The Lonely Man

The poem surrounds a life of a young boy brought up in a dysfunctional home, growing he becomes hard and bitter. Trapping himself in a world he can't adjust to. As the world becomes aware of the problem we find it is to late for him.

Long hath he sat in silence withering
A crying heart with no one listening.
Walls cast shadows beneath the moon
And no one sees him within the room

Where wisdoms' found within haunted eyes
Of a little boy who never cries
In time the boy grows thick and strong
And to the world he raised his arms

But the world cannot bare his sight
So alone he walks the shadows of night
And those who dare to raise a hand
Soon find out he's become a man.

But like the child without a life
He's all alone without a wife
His heart is hardened, his soul contained
He knows not how, a love sustain

So he sits in the shadows silently withering
A lonely soul though the worlds' now listening.

Reviews

[Michael X]

I really liked this poem until the last couple of lines,
just killed the poem and seemed weak and all over the place, at the last line.
pardon my harsh approach. but the meaning had me in the grips of its flow.
and I thoroughly enjoyed reading this, could be tightened a bit, all around. great job.

[Pale Rose]

Wow! This poem really struck a chord with me. It flows and rhymes, but it also has a deep meaning. I think "wisdoms'" is a typo, I think you meant "wisdom's" as in "wisdom is" but I could be wrong. Another suggestion I have is instead of:

Where wisdoms' found within haunted eyes
Of a little boy who never cries

I think it would sound better as:

Wisdom is found within the haunted eyes
Of a little boy who never cries

Why? Because it sounds more concrete this way; it's fragmented as it is, and therefore it's hard to grasp the meaning of the lines easily.

Even if you don't change those things, I still love this poem. :)

[Jordan Cattell]

Thought it was brilliant!