Moving Words

Moving Words

 

You can call me what you want

You can do to me what you will

Your words slide right off me

And your actions don’t impress me

 

You think you are better than me

More confident than me

That I’m below you

Right at your feet

Cleaning your shoes

 

Your wish is my command

 

I’m done with that

I’m done with you

You want me?

Come to me

Not as my boss

Not as my master

As an equal

 

You think because you’re bigger than me

Older than me

You’re better than me?

 

It doesn’t work that way

You don’t fear hurting me

But I hold back from hurting you

 

The damage you do me

I can double

No triple

So watch your back

One day I might snap

And we will see just how good you are

 

At making my words slide right off you

At making my actions not impress you

 

You can call me what you want

You can do to me what you will

And I’ll call you what I want

And do to you what I will

 

I’ll double

No

I’ll triple

It all 

Reviews

[M.M.I]

I agree with the others; this poem is alive and it seems to be an angry one. It was a different read for me. A good one.

[Jibey]

I liked the feisty feeling of this... You are not going to be used or abuse.... Good for you... I can imagine you're well able to give someone a piece of your mind when the blood starts racing... The writing flows down the page with energy and vitality.

[khalid]

you are the most fighting poet i have read for recently. it needs strong ability to use poetry which people think it is a way to express swet feelings and emotions, as a weapon to attack. i like how you do it

[Coyote Poetry]

Your mind is alive and strong. The poetry is strong and with purpose. I like the conversation and the goal of the poem. Sometime we must stand our ground and not accept less. Thank you for the outstanding poem.
Coyote

[James William Dyer]

Somehow I feel you should throw a reference to "sticks and stones will break my bones but words will never hurt me" but invert it, since language is the MOST powerful weapon, words do hurt, they can break the bones of a person's skeletal architecture. Get 'em, saw their bones with a jigsaw of metaphors. A belittling person is nothing but an a*s clown.

[Ees]

Nice work.
Sometimes older, bigger people forget that the wee little young ones know their own ways of crushing them.

[Baby Ricochet]

I've had a few superiors I've felf the same way about. Great job Destinyxi.

[Relic's Bare Trees]

You've wielded your pen like a warrior princess in this one. Each line is exerted with force from tension that has been built up over time and is now being released and applied. The ending is of one to be feared.

If I may make one slight suggestion,
(That) I’m below you
Right at your feet
Cleaning your shoes

Nice one Destinyxi.

[Rob Santana]

Raw and strong words here. I really like the courage and brave stand you take here. If possible check out my poem "YOU'RE NO DIFFERENT TO ME" Something similiar to this write. Good job here.

[kublakhan27]

This one reads a lot like a song, probably cuz of the repetition, which works wonderfully...I'm sure I've mentioned at some point in time that I like repetition, but that doesn't mean that line/stanza within a poem can be repeated at random...you have to know what parts to repeat to truly get a message across, otherwise you lose the reader's attention...you've worked that device to perfection in past pieces as well as this one :)

Have I regained my status as a master reviewer? :)