Falling

Falling

A Story by Ecnelis
"

Tonight I am falling.

"

Tonight I am falling.

Not in love. Doing that so many times before doesn’t make it nearly as crushing or breathtaking.

Tonight I am falling out of myself. Falling so fast and completely, I feel my skull shake and feel the room blur around me.

It was only moments ago when the world decided to give me a good dose of truth, something that made me realize, I am not who I think I am.

I roll over in my bed and stare at the ceiling. Popcorn constellations are outlined in red sharpie marker. To the right there is my angel, to the left, the moon, along with many other sharpie shapes and creatures I discovered during those long sleepless nights. As I lie staring, a new figure jumps out at me. It is a crying girl. Very intricate. This one will take a while to outline.

As I stand on my bed, red sharpie marker in hand, I begin to draw.

She reminds me of me…

I wonder for a moment what happened to her.

Maybe she thought she was better then everyone else. Maybe she had been under the impression that she would succeed where others failed… because she was so much more equipped for it. And maybe, amongst all her self-praising thoughts, thoughts that had never been questioned before, she was rudely awakened to the fact that she was no better than anyone else.

Maybe she was humbled by the kind act of a stranger who showed her what true dedication was. Maybe she was a fool who lost her way on the road she chose.

Maybe it was a little bit of everything.

I sigh and lie back down and look up at the constellations.

Funny.

The girl looks like she is laughing.

© 2011 Ecnelis


Author's Note

Ecnelis
Just a quick piece. As I lay down to sleep I looked up at my popcorn ceilings and here it is@

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Reviews

so very beautiful, I look forward to reading more from you

Posted 12 Years Ago


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this is very short, but I don't see how it could be a bit longer (and still be as good.) The beginning is very nice, there is a distinct air of someone getting caught up in something, but also being jaded. It also cuts out the whole prospect of "romance," which in literature (in my opinion) is almost always a good thing
The character's thoughts are a bit nebulous and almost generic, but I think that increases the number of people that can relate to her.

I like this because it's very much about deriving meaning and projecting from ordinary things, which is what a lot of writers and readers do... I suppose we have to do it to understand things.
I also love the idea of drawing around the spackling patterns... I used to pick out figures (i even kept track of them...yeah I was/am a wierd kid) but I never would have thought to do that.

Posted 12 Years Ago


muse..the word defining that which conjols us into thinking...creating.. finally a prose poem about a real Muse inspirational thought in your minds eye......i like...

Posted 12 Years Ago


this is a simple piece of work i like it great job. :)

Posted 12 Years Ago


This is beautiful, like a sad song on the radio can be beautiful, n' truly inspiring! I love writers who look around the darkness of their own room and see whole hidden worlds! ㋡

Posted 12 Years Ago


I really like the way you word your thoughts, very articulately & artistically. I love this, honestly, you made the subject so unique, great piece :)

Posted 12 Years Ago


Interesting. It's always good to jot things like this down (or "type" them down, since not many of us use those ancient pen things anymore).
I think it's good that this piece is left open to interpretation, because it's a concept many people can relate to: things suddenly changing unexpectedly, realizing things about yourself you never thought could be true.
Nice writing, very thoughtful.

Posted 12 Years Ago


0 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Sounds rather.... i don't know beautiful? No really, i find it full of emotions and really cleverly written. I think it can even pass as a complete short story rather than just a piece of prose.
Good job.

Posted 13 Years Ago


This is very nice, I can't really describe what it is about it, but i really like it. :)

Posted 13 Years Ago


0 of 1 people found this review constructive.


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Added on March 23, 2011
Last Updated on March 23, 2011

Author

Ecnelis
Ecnelis

Orlando, FL



About
Every few steps I look at my feet to make sure they are going in a decent direction. My life is defined by my complete fascination with the world around me. When the Sun looks at the Earth, do y.. more..

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A Story by Ecnelis



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