Echoes Of Silence

Enjoy or don't...

My body is numb

Nothing I can feel

No more I can say

Here to rest forever

Here to rot forever

Nobody to talk to

No one to listen

Just echoes,

Echoes of silence 

In a molding casket

The worms eat at me

My dead flesh sours

I can't take it anymore

Why must this be death

Why not just nothing

A lifetime in a box

Not my idea of heaven

Not even close to hell

Author's Note

Umm what do you think? Too much? Not enough?

Reviews

[NoelHC]

An interesting poem, and some dark thoughts here. I have to agree with Jennie's review, not much more I would add to her comments, which are correct.

I see in your bio " I want to be THE GRESTEST WRITER OF ALL TIME!!! "

Maybe it should be " I want to be THE GREATEST WRITER OF ALL TIME!!! ; )

[Jack Kennedy]

Hahaha thanks I never caught that!! Thanks for review!

[Jennie Baron]

Hmm, maybe the previous reviewer had a point about the third stanza? For one thing, if there is "no one to talk to" and "no one to listen" surely one would not be able to hear the voices of the other dead? Also, I'm not sure if "sucks" fits in. This poem is dark in an artistic way and perhaps even more effective without that last stanza.

Also, I suggest changing "not even close of hell" to "not even close to hell."

[Jack Kennedy]

Thanks for the review! I will drop the third one or write a brand new one!!

[lee_jang]

wow seriously, where are you getting these dark ideas? Hahaha i kind of like it dude! You are so much into dark ideas though, but that's fine because that's your thing. I'm not good at poems, but I can say that this one is cool. I like the end part, like... I'll be next? Hahaha. Like it.

[Jack Kennedy]

Haha thanks I think I took a step out of dark poems and this was my reintroduction into them. Oh and thanks for reviewing and liking it!!! Greatly appreciated!! :-)

[Shaulk]

Pretty good. You could probably lose the third paragraph.

[Jack Kennedy]

Thanks for the review. I'll keep that in mind.