With my love, I scarred the moon.

I am a shadow.

Sometimes, I lie beneath the trees.

I embrace the cold sun.

Nowadays, I like your feet.

It's summer,

I like staying beneath.

In the night, I wake up,

only to be misguided by the pale moonlight.

He promises to show me

my way back home

as a reparation.

He follows a car

and makes way for me,

we travel along, the three of us.

Somehow, we're left behind, him and me.

So, I crawl up the trees,

the shadow of the winds,

they carry me to the stars.

I jump into his lap.

The night says

that I make him look ugly.

But, he embraces me 

and we never let go.

 

- September 6th, 2013

11.55 a.m

Author's Note

Absolutely, very random. Be kind.

Reviews

[Muse]

The night says
that I make him look ugly.
But, he embraces me
and we never let go.


I adore these last four lines. Actually I believe that less is more in times such as this. I would have just shared the last four lines as a quote...it has that much impact.

Muse

[Mehak Mushtaq]

Thank you. :)

[Lourisa]

Beautiful imagery! You create a vivid image which I felt part of. My favorite part:
"So, I crawl up the trees,
the shadow of the winds,
they carry me to the stars.
I jump into his lap."
Thanks Mahek!

[SHEEMA HUQ]

You set the setting exceptionally well, very well done.

[s y e]

This was great. I loved how you wrote it and your wording. Great job.

[Leslie Philibert]

Like the car image ; this puts it into a frame that transports the impression, makes it visual. A good write
from a talented young poet.

[Mehak Mushtaq]

Thank you.

[Sami Khalil]

So, I crawl up the trees,

the shadow of the winds,

they carry me to the stars.
I like how you defined your self as a shadow for that is humbling and realistic in our lives for we echo the voice within and reflect the image within...Splendid as always...:)

[Mehak Mushtaq]

Thank you. :)

[Sami Khalil]

You are welcome...:)

[London's Lily]

I like poetry about the moon and the night, and this is a great example. I could feel the quiet emptiness of the night, and the vastness of the sky. I especially like the lines, "I jump into his lap. The night says that I make him look ugly. But, he embraces me and we never let go." Well done :)

[Mehak Mushtaq]

Thank you. :)

[annie lee]

The mood of this is mysterious and a little esoteric. But the words have a lovely lyrical rhythm. The nature connection is very apparent. I like this for its mystical qualities -- when I read it, the words become a slowly swirling column of soft, white smoke, and when I move my hand through the smoke, my hand tingles.

[Mehak Mushtaq]

Woah, I love this review. Thanks! :)