Freeform-Transgender

This is a little freeform poem I made about the feelings and troubles of a Transgendered pre-everything life. I want to get surgery, to change my name, but things in my life have made them delayed.

Do you know how strange it is to look at your face and not hear a name?

To know it but never remember,

To hear it but never react,

To not know who you are.

 

 

Who is that girl I see?

 

 

Can you imagine waking up as a dog, a millionaire, a whale?

To wonder why your skin lies,

To feel like you're always falling,

To forget what being happy was?

 

 

What are these things on my body?

 

 

Will you imagine for a moment the pain I am going through?

To be embarrassed everywhere I go,

To feel judged for what's been there forever,

To be who I am inside but not out.

 

 

When am I going to get to be myself?

 

 

Have you ever wanted something so bad it made you sick?

To be weighed down with negatives,

To have to hear the wrong words every day,

To be a man in a women's shell.

 

 

Where is the happy, friendly person I used to be?

 

 

Should be over by now, but I've waited so long

To smile without strain,

To have fun without worry,

To be me without a disguise.

 

 

Why can't I just get back to living my life?