Inventing the Memory

exactly the same as before

Inventing the Memory        

        Hallie bid farewell to Bianca, her new workout partner, and left the exclusive Hollywood gym. The beads of sweat that had formed around the crown of her head faded with the warm spring weather, Hallie cranked the air conditioning in her car and tiredly flopped onto her cool leather car seat. The whole cast of the show had been offered free memberships by the well known personal trainers of the private fitness club, and with all the countless press interviews and promotional events beginning to pile on them during the day, Bianca and Hallie decided they'd take advantage of the work out center to improve their appearances. Right, because their bodies must have been awful if they were stars of a popular new TV show.
        As most women do, Hallie had little areas that bothered her, like her thighs and a tiny little bulge in her stomach that never seemed to go away no matter how many sit-ups she did. Before being on a TV show, she just saw these flaws as annoying but cared little about them. Now, with always being in the limelight, she constantly worried about her weight, and had come to a point where she was stressed out over not looking absolutely perfect. Somehow Bianca, her tall, gorgeous, annoyingly flawless-bodied co-star and new Abby replacement, had the secret for staying slim. Hallie wasn't sure what it was, but by working out with Bianca, maybe she would learn the secret too, and the areas she didn't like would eventually melt away.

        "What if they don't?" Hallie thought to herself, as she looked at her reflection in her rear view mirror before she backed out. Her heart pounded wildly in her chest at the thought of this, and she cringed thinking she'd be stuck with the stupid bulge, and her stupid thighs. Hallie comforted herself by reviewing the long cardio work out she had just done, and drove on back to her place. After she showered and did her hair, she pulled out a brand new low cut pink dress that she had bought with Bianca, put it on, and she sat in the living room, realizing that for once in a long time she had nothing to do. Living without a roommate, with out Abby hadn't seemed so bad because Hallie was never home, but now the awkward loneliness was beginning to set in. To take her mind off it, she reached for the remote and turned on the TV, and vainly watched reruns of herself on the show. This only made her see the imperfections of her body even more, so she turned it off and went in the kitchen to do her favorite thing in the world. It sucked that she had no one to cook for, but maybe for once she could just eat it herself.

        It was still only ten o clock in the morning, so technically it was still breakfast time, and since breakfast was her favorite meal ever, she decided to make chocolate French toast with vanilla ice cream. After she created the French toast and dipped it into melted chocolate chips, she scooped out a large scoop of vanilla ice cream and plopped it on the toast. She fetched a fork from the drawer, and just as she was about to sit down and eat, she slammed the fork on the table.

        "What the hell am I doing?" Hallie cursed out loud. She looked down at the plate of fattening food and couldn't believe herself. What was she thinking about to eat a meal like this when she was trying to lose weight? She swiped the plate off the table, and was ready to dump it all in the garbage, when she thought of Abby, who would absolutely savor a meal like this. Hallie was pretty sure that Abby was staying in Kristin's off campus apartment, so she wrapped the breakfast in tinfoil ready to take it over there, as an apology and a peace offering.

        She got back in her car, and quickly drove out to the freeway. The exit to Kristin's place was just coming up. Hallie practiced in her head what she would say to Abby as an apology. "I'm sorry I've been a crappy friend, here is some French toast," or "Sorry for acting like a total b***h, please come back just don't be mad if we can't hang out anymore." Yeah none of those would work would they? She thought about her sweet friend, the only genuine friend she ever really had in her life. There was Kristin, Julia, and the girls from the show, but no one actually cared for her as Abby did. Instead of warm tears beginning to run down her face like they normally would, a coldness took over, her face became stiff as if ice had frozen over her body. Who needed Abby anyway? What so great about having a best friend? Fame had been much kinder, and was seeming to stick around unlike a girl who was supposed to be her sister, unlike parents that were supposed to love her, unlike a boy that was supposed to grow into a man and give her the life he promised her. None of these people were real, they were as fake as Hollywood itself. Then again there was someone that never pretended to be any of those things. He was just himself: boring, unimaginative, unromantic, and predictable. She suddenly knew who she wanted to bring the food to, and passed the exit to Kristin's house, and head on a different route.

�

        The high rise condominiums seemed prettier than ever, a spotless white with gold tinted windows, surrounded by palm trees and replicas of European fountains. Hallie parked on the street, took the food out, and marched up the stairs with it. The memory of her climbing the stairs to Derek's crappy apartment drifted into her mind, except this time she didn't feel so pathetic. She felt strong, a feeling she never felt around Christian. After she effortlessly climbed up to the right floor, another memory of her Thanksgiving visit arose. The part where she couldn't remember the freaking unit number, because right now, she couldn't recall the one here at all. She knew what floor it was, but no clue of the unit number. Knowing that she would have to do the same thing she did on Thanksgiving, , she approached the first unit and knocked.

        Quicker than she expected the door flung open.

        "What?" an angry man in an expensive Hugo Boss tailored suit demanded while on a blinking cell phone.

        "Sorry to bother you, but would you happen to know-,"

        "I don't want any!" the man shouted, angrily looking down at her food thinking she was selling it or something. "Go bother someone else," he barked then slammed the door.

        Hallie was taken aback by the rudeness, and figured everyone in the building would probably be the same way. It was funny that back when she went into an unpleasant neighborhood to find Christian that the strangers door she knocked on had been so kind to lead her in the right direction, where as here she was in a pleasant neighborhood, but the people were, well, not so pleasant.

        Hallie racked her brain trying to think of the unit number, went to the one she thought it might be, and lightly knocked, hoping this person wouldn't be as rude as the last one. If this wasn't it, she'd just dump the freaking French toast in the garbage and go home. She was tired of going around like a total idiot.

        "Who is it?" a voice called through the intercom. A definite familiar voice.

        "It's Hallie."
        
        "Hallie? Um�okay, just give me a second," the voice clicked off and Hallie could hear someone rustling around the condo as if they weren't dressed or something. Maybe she should have called first, but as we know, showing up unexpectedly was more her style.

        A curtain from the front window on the other side became pushed back, and surprised brown eyes peered through as if to make sure it was really Hallie.

        "Hi�," the confused voice said the same time as he opened the door.

        "Hello David."

        "Come in I guess," he invited hesitantly. "Did you need anything? Or-,"

Hallie interrupted by walking past him and setting the glass platter loudly on the kitchen counter.

"Uh, I'm kind of confused here. You know we haven't talked in a month or so, and-,"

"I made a mistake David," Hallie abruptly turned around to face him, interrupting again.

"What? I don't understand, you told me it's over. You gave the ring back, you said it was ugly, remember?"

"It was ugly. But that isn't why I gave it back. I wasn't ready yet, I am now. I want to be with you, I screwed up but I want to forget about that, and go back to where we were," Hallie stated non pleadingly, void of emotion.

" But you cheated on me Hallie! You cheated with that, with-," David's voice trailed off trying to think of the right word.

"With that scumbag orphan?" Hallie finished the sentence for him.

"Yes," David frowned curiously at her reference of Christian.

"When he came back he dragged me back into that old s****y life that I once had with him. I was stupid David, he screwed up my thinking, to where I wasn't myself. I'm back to myself now, I'm adult, I'm not a child anymore," Hallie explained firmly.

"That's ridiculous though, I mean how am I supposed to trust you? You cheated multiple times, not just once, you know?"

Hallie wished so badly that she was in her "Hot Girls" uniform, but the new skimpy pink dress she bought with Bianca would have to do for now.

"Have you seen my show?" Hallie purred ignoring his concerns. She strut across the kitchen and delicately unwrapped the foil from the food.

"Yeah, I have but-,"

"Do you like it?" Hallie asked, dipping a finger now partially melted vanilla ice cream, gathering some chocolate from the French toast along with it, licking it slowly off her finger, what seemed to be her little trademark now.

David said nothing, and only stared, just as Hallie expected him to.

"Try some," she ordered, scooping more onto her finger and holding it up to his mouth.

David quickly looked away trying to resist, and trying to remember that this was the girl that hurt him, but it was really hard remembering anything when she was wearing that low cut dress. Finally he came to his senses, and right when he was about to speak Hallie grabbed his face with her non-chocolaty hand, giving him a seductive kiss that she knew only a "Hot Girl" could give.

"Back to where we started," Hallie would later say that evening, knowing she would get what she wanted. That was the great thing about David that she had completely forgotten about till now. He had little respect for her, but best of all he had none for himself, unlike another man she knew of, whom from this day forward she would never mention again. Then again we should know by now that Hallie will forget all about being future Mrs. Carrington when the real guy she would like to call her husband may turn back up, and in Hallie's perfect world that's exactly what would happen.