She Adores the Silence

She Adores the Silence

A Poem by astoundinglyattractive
"

the story of a girl

"
She was eleven years old when
a boy called her ugly
and a girl called her stupid
and they made fun of her hair
and they told her she was weird.
And it wasn't long after that
that her mother began to favour
the word "disgusting";
and she didn't see her father anymore
and her brother was held in favour.
It wasn't so bad, see,
it had always been that way-
he was better than she was,
and she had raised him,
after all.
And she didn't really have friends
for a few years.
There was one,
but they didn't talk much.
Not anymore.

And she liked to act, and she liked to sing,
but no-one wanted to listen
or have her in a scene.
But she had this dream,
and she was bound to succeed!
Because she always did, even if
know one ever saw it.
But over time she began to fade
and she felt like giving in.
Time and time again.
Because she tried- oh, how she tried-
to be what she was supposed to be,
to feel as she was supposed to feel.
But a kid shouldn't raise a kid!
For she learned to care for her fellow man,
but nothing on how to love him.

So she didn't have a heart.

And she never had anyone,
never had the chance-
for if a mother can't love a child,
well, then who can?
But she was amazing, god,
she was gorgeous.
And talented and so full of intelligence.
But she couldn't see it,
for they told her she was wrong;-
but it's not her fault.
She tried to change for them,
time and time again,
but she couldn't-
too little, too late,
and too much damage.

And with time, things changed,
but she stayed the same;
and to this day
her scars remain.
But that's okay.
She's happier now, all by herself,
and she doesn't need
anybody else.
And why is that so sad?
Why is that so wrong?
There aren't always two parts
to every song.
And, besides,
she prefers to sing alone,
when it's quiet.
Oh, how she adores the silence.
And embraces the dark-
it makes her feel safe-
until she remembers she doesn't have a heart
and that everyone hates her.
And she tries not to care,
but you don't have to 
have a heart
to sometimes feel scared!
Scared that they're right
and that you're not worth a thing-
that because you are different 
you are also insane,
and damaged,
and worthless-
but none of that's true!
Yes, she is broken,
but so are you!

She's three parts shattered,
two parts
barely hanging together,
and we're all falling apart.
We're all a pair of shoes worn thin,
a plan gone wrong,
a sweater unraveling
because it was washed too long.
And she's the only one who sees it!
She sees all the scars but she can't stop the bleeding
and you look me in the eye
and tell me
you would still believe in God,
if you'd heard the things she's heard
or seen the things she saw.

She's not hopeless,
but she knows there's no hope.
And she doesn't wish or dream it,
she goes out and achieves it.
And she does the things
that no-one else will-
it may get steeper,
but she's always going uphill.
And that's a good thing!
Why wouldn't it be?
Because she will reach the top,
and when you're looking
at the whole world,
how can you be lost?
She believes it,
and she needs it,
and she won't let you impede it.
For to her it is truth 
what to you is naive,
and you're the crazy one
the way she sees it.

Because she'll stand in the street
and watch you walk by, holding hands
and she doesn't understand
understand how
or why.
Because no-one's ever loved her
and no-one ever will.

Because she doesn't have a heart.

But how do they think you earn one?

Yet how could she be with someone
when they could never understand
what it means to be alone?
For it is all she has ever known.
And it's who she is
and she doesn't want to change!
She doesn't want to be saved
from some danger you've
created in your brain!
Because you can't understand it,
see, she's fine!
She's perfect in her mind!
And she can't begin to explain it,
it's pointless,
you could never understand it
because she can care
and she can trust.
But she cannot love 
and she cannot be loved
because she hates to be touched.

Oh, she knows there's no heaven,
no such thing as a hell-
we all end up the same,
six feet underground.
And she knows it.
And it's true.
And it's not her fault-
there is nothing wrong with her.

Or you.

She was doomed from the start.
She never had a chance
to have a heart.

© 2013 astoundinglyattractive


Author's Note

astoundinglyattractive
I like the poems that are stories and say a thing.
This is my effort to say a thing.

My Review

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Reviews

This gave me chills, so frightening and eerily an echo of modern society. Good message, well-written poetry.

Posted 2 Years Ago


A wonderful put together story poem. I liked how it went more in depth the feelings than most poetry. I think if there was one suggestion I could make, it would be to either make it all in rhyming lines, or not at all... there were places that it rhymed and flowed wonderfully...then sections where the rhymes went away.. I thought that the rhymes may have been accidental?

In any case. I enjoyed this tale in poetry.

Aaron

Posted 7 Years Ago


Oh my goodness! You wrote MY life story, my hurt, my abuse, my mother, my pain. It hurt it hit too close to home, you could have been writing my life story,
Beautiful job! The way you write, the style, it seemed almost to have a certain rhythm, a certain rhyme, almost a sweet cadence as I read it. I totally enjoyed reading your story/poem. Very sad, very lovely, the way you wrote it. ~smiles~ keep up the good work. (I don't think I could do in a lifetime, what you just did. Use your talent, don't waste it.)

Posted 7 Years Ago


Omg...too long...lol :) but i liked this one great job, this could be my fav. poem...100/100

Posted 7 Years Ago


This is very, very long. I read it quickly and I like the poem, but try to make a short poem. Because long poems are just stories. I hope you find my review useful.

Posted 8 Years Ago


astoundinglyattractive

8 Years Ago

Thank you (:
However, this is, and was intended to be a story. The formatting is that of a poe.. read more
I love that you tell a story and I think it's a beautiful story to tell. However, I would try to show more than you tell. In the beginning we are told that she was called weird but it would be interesting to see why and there were similar instances throughout the poem that would have benefited from a more "in scene" than "narrating" quality.

Posted 8 Years Ago


astoundinglyattractive

8 Years Ago

What's weird about her is that she likes to be alone, and quiet, and she doesn't want or need compan.. read more
Jordan Bryant

8 Years Ago

As long as everything is done with purpose, then you should feel good about it. It's very nice work.
astoundinglyattractive

8 Years Ago

Thank-you! (:
ugh dude your poetry is so good

Posted 8 Years Ago


astoundinglyattractive

8 Years Ago

you mean yOUR POETRY IS SO BADA HhaHAHhahHAHhaAahahahhaHAHahHAHa

No you do beautiful th.. read more

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585 Views
7 Reviews
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Added on April 16, 2013
Last Updated on April 17, 2013
Tags: story, spoken word, teen, sad, love, prose, heart

Author

astoundinglyattractive
astoundinglyattractive

Six Feet Under, OH



About
Name: Elisa Age: 16 Gender: Female Height: 5'6" Country: America Sexuality: I like to consider myself a freelancer. Personality: I used to have one, but I think I lost it somewhere. I enjoy: d.. more..

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