A Story by SOUL LESS

Beads of perspiration rolled down Julian’s face as he gave the shovel another enormous jerk, sending mounds of dirt flying.


Normally, he would’ve been thinking of the coming day’s miseries or ways of pleasing his landlord to earn some extra money. Today, he was devastated, devastated by the death of his only child, Lucy. She had spent hardly a year in this world of men when she had died of illness, called back to her Lord.


Julian swore; long and fluently and a few birds singing nearby flew away. He cursed the landlord for it was he who had brought this misery upon him. The days events flew through his mind; the snarling landlord refusing him medical aid, his own person kneeling and crying before the landlord and his daughter’s pale countenance. Julian was already beginning to feel weak at the knees; about to dissolve into tears again, when a rustle in the grass distracted him.


Wearily Julian glanced over his shoulder, to locate the source of the disturbance. His eyes fell on a little girl playing in the grass near the edge of the field; being supervised by the landlady and two maids. The landlord’s daughter, he thought bitterly. She reminded him of his own daughter and refreshed the loss in his mind. A sudden unprecedented feeling of hate rose up in him demanding the death of the little girl. Julian’s own daughter had been killed by that accursed landlord, why should his daughter live. The landlord would be made to feel the pain he was experiencing, the pain of a loved one dead. He took a step towards his target, anger mounting.      


Julian’s sharp ear’s pricked to the sound of sounds not very far away. They were barking madly, seemingly excited about something. He spotted the landlord’s hounds tearing across the field heading straight for the girl.


Providence, he thought had brought the hounds here. Now he would have his revenge upon the landlord. Feeling himself avenged, he leant on the shovel to witness the scene with satisfaction and a sort of savage pleasure. The hounds drew closer now aware of the girl’s presence. A second feeling rose up in him as he watched her twiddling a jasmine in her hands, oblivious to the oncoming danger. A sudden concern for the girl’s life made Julian take a second step towards her. After all it was the landlord’s fault that his daughter was lying dead at home and not of this innocent, clueless little girl.  Julian was engaged in a fierce mental battle; on one side was his grief which rooted him to the spot and on the other were his nature and the girl’s innocence.


The landlady was shouting hysterically, the maids hopping around helplessly. Julian could’ve stood there and watched the little girl die; no could see him amidst the tall sugarcane. His nature won. Julian rushed towards the landlord’s daughter shovel raised. In one fluent motion he scooped up the girl in his arms and ran for the edge of the field. The hound caretakers were rushing to catch the hounds. One of the hounds, a massive Bulldog, was almost upon her. With one swing of his shovel he brought the hound to the ground writhing in agony. He dropped the shovel and ran towards the landlady, the hounds still in hot pursuit. As he reached the edge of the field one of the hounds collided into him. He fell down making sure that the girl remained unhurt. Julian’s lips curved into a smile as he watched the child crawl into her mother’s thankful arms. With the smile of content still etched on his face his eyes rolled into oblivion as the injured hound collapsed on top of him.

















© 2011 SOUL LESS

Author's Note

This is my version of the story Innocence. I copied the typed version and accidentally put up my sister's version. (Sarusai Hiryu on writerscafe)

Its easy to mix up like this coz i usually come up with the ideas...and she has a knack for writing them better than myself...:D

My Review

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This was a great piece. I enjoyed the read. I know it's hard to lose someone so young and not having anyone care that she was dying. That landlord did deserve what was coming to him, but the man was able to get his feelings in check and save her. That was a brave thing. A very brave thing. I'm just glad he was able to save her. Thank you for sharing.

Posted 8 Years Ago

I do not think they are easy to mix up.

Posted 8 Years Ago

Engagingly beautiful well written story.

Posted 8 Years Ago

It was very good howmind over matter plays a big roll in life no matter what your mind is thinking what matters most is what is most important

Posted 9 Years Ago

I love this story!! great job!
did the guy die ??

Posted 10 Years Ago

This was very well written.
Your descriptions put me right into the story. I could feel the Julian's emotions, and I could understand the hate he felt towards the Landlord. I also like the whole concept. The fact that he wanted the Landlord to suffer, to feel the pain he felt, but at the same time, was victim to the innocence of the girl.
Good job.


Posted 10 Years Ago

Peculiar to say the least.
I was..divided, perplexed...I don’t know.
Half of me loved this, the simple fact that a man was divided on getting revenge for his little girl, or saving the life of an innocent. The other half of me seems..put off by the fathers emotions. Not in the fact that its the wrong emotions, just that they don’t seem...deep down true to me-personally. I would think that someone who had just lost their daughter that morning might be crying while digging the grave.
Got it, more elaboration, that what it is. More elaboration on the emotions, stress them, make them known to me, so that I feel the same. So that I want to cry whilst the father digs his own daughters grave
Over all, I liked this, loved it in fact. And plan on reading more of your work. This was a wonderful write, you do have talent :)


Posted 10 Years Ago

This story was so emotional! I was quite anxious when he was in his mental battle! But...just to be sure...I feel quite silly...he died, right? I'm so sorry, I am pretty sure, but not positive haha. Overall very excellent story. You showed his thought process very well :)

Posted 10 Years Ago

you are right it is better than your sis.

Posted 10 Years Ago

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9 Reviews
Added on January 5, 2011
Last Updated on January 5, 2011



Nakushita, Kansuki

I am a boy. I love English Literature. I love to write. Some people hate me for it, but for me writing is like an escape from the real world. Its like reading a book except that I control what happens.. more..


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