Tears

Tears

A Poem by Fives Mitchell
"

Sometimes the pains we go through just have to be kept inside.

"
Wipe away your tears
you've done it for years
get up off the floor
run for the door
dont cry
if only you could fly
wipe away the pain
stop the rain
put on a fake smile
it will be a whilestop and take a breather
nobody cares about me either
your not the only one
I know its not fun
keep your lips closed
lock them and throw away the key
yes they too hurt me
you've never spoken
your wings are broken
try and fly away
but everything turns grey
the flowers all die
inside you cry
you think your a shame
and you were always to blame
you think your not worth it
your not perfect
you create a world in your mind
hopeing there is something better to find
you go mute and shut down
you fall to the ground
you cant keep going on like this
theres so much good you miss
you cant take it
but you just bite your lip
wipe away your tears
never show your fears
I know how you feel
im on that same wheel
you think there is nobody like you
but the truth is, its time for you to see
you are me.

© 2011 Fives Mitchell


Author's Note

Fives Mitchell
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Deeply somber poem here my friend. Aside from the lack of punctuation this piece is a beauty and something we all should read once in awhile. You capture the emotion quite well, the depression and sadness, how we try so hard to fight what we feel yet it seemingly overcoming at times and these emotions leave us feeling completely lost and alone.

In our own personal sorrow, we feel lost within it, drowning in it almost and this bereft feeling hovers like a cloud over us to the point where we cannot see past our own misery to the joy and beauty that abounds around us. But having the ability to relate to someone who is going through or has gone through the same thing can be such a blessing and gives one the ability to move forward.

Ok, I'm going on a tangent here. :)

A wonderful write, it may not hurt to form it into multiple stanzas, the rhyming is wonderfully done and as for the aforementioned punctuation issues this one is a hit! Bravo my dear!

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.




Reviews

I actually love this one. Of course there will be typos so just go back and fix'em no biggie....
It is a fabulous piece of work!

Posted 8 Years Ago


This poem is about shared pain? I must admit I think its too negative a poem and what we need is something more hopeful -- to me this poem seems pessimistic. But I guess many people have a pessimistic outlook on life. The two poems I wrote were more like artistic responses to other works, and critical of life on earth; but my stance is there is a way out, and, 'there is good out there'.
Shirley Maclaine said something interesting about being rejected, something like: we chose to have the problems we are now having, we chose people to reject us, all so we could learn a lesson. I think it could be true to some extent. I think she means we dont want to face something, like we need to have courage and not be afraid of dying for example, and so we create other problems until we face the truth about ourselves and our reason for having a life.
My life? I can relate to those dark feelings but I feel we all have something stronger within us that wants us to acknowledge its right to live and be expressed. Until we acknowledge our true selves, we will continue to have depression and sadness. I think people reject us because we have something they dont have and secretly wish they did. I think were here to learn to not care that people dont care about us.
I think that means to learn what is vital for our existence.

Posted 8 Years Ago


It was a good poem but you need to go back and fix the spelling and punctuation mistakes.

Posted 8 Years Ago


WOW. THERE IS NOTHING LIKE YOU TALKING TO YOU. TELLING YOURSELF THE TRUTH. THIS SEEMS LIKE THE ALTER EGO TYPE OF POEM. BUT HOW DEEP IT IS! THIS IS SOMETHING SO PERSONAL AND FOR YOU TO COME OUT WITH IT IN THIS WAY, YOU HAVE A LOT OF GUTS. THIS HAS TO BE ONE OF MY FAVES.

Posted 8 Years Ago


This is well said and strikes me as something that would have been very moving to me at another time in my life. I have no use for hiding things anymore. :)

Posted 8 Years Ago


this is what I needed to hear. as of now- I have been sent h8 mailed, pointed at, crossed, rejected, and disowned. (I chose this path) but why must the ones, that say they always would love you, throw you out like you weren't.

very nice. lines 10 and 11 are stuck together, but that is the only thing I see that needs help. very good.


Posted 8 Years Ago


Sharp and a seeming voice of youth but THAT doesn't "FEEL" right... the poem tastes like a planned sarcasm but without more of your work to further taste I am left to assume - and I hate that. I am reminded of others - but age does that, it GIVES you a familiarity with others to be reminded of. One perhaps type-oh or a pre-planned distraction - both fit.

Chris

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Deeply somber poem here my friend. Aside from the lack of punctuation this piece is a beauty and something we all should read once in awhile. You capture the emotion quite well, the depression and sadness, how we try so hard to fight what we feel yet it seemingly overcoming at times and these emotions leave us feeling completely lost and alone.

In our own personal sorrow, we feel lost within it, drowning in it almost and this bereft feeling hovers like a cloud over us to the point where we cannot see past our own misery to the joy and beauty that abounds around us. But having the ability to relate to someone who is going through or has gone through the same thing can be such a blessing and gives one the ability to move forward.

Ok, I'm going on a tangent here. :)

A wonderful write, it may not hurt to form it into multiple stanzas, the rhyming is wonderfully done and as for the aforementioned punctuation issues this one is a hit! Bravo my dear!

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Deep, a bit sad, but it has a great flow and is very well written.

Posted 8 Years Ago



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9 Reviews
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Added on October 9, 2011
Last Updated on October 9, 2011
Tags: Tears, fun, fake, smile, flowers
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Author

Fives Mitchell
Fives Mitchell

New York, NY



About
Fives Mitchell: I'm quite a person I must say.. Overwhelmed by my passion for literature, I resorted to writing, and look where it's gotten me.. more..


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