the iambus of the last two stanza's ring like a Shakespearean sonnet. My dad wore metal taps on his shoes. Fable had it that he wanted mother to hear him coming for sex.
You've changed; your poetry, the colubrid hiss of rhyming wordplay will no longer suffice as "poetry" for you my friend. You know how Monk once knocked a musician for "making the wrong mistakes"? Is poetry a process of making the right mistakes? You're amazing....dana
Posted 9 Months Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
9 Months Ago
I was framed? oh how I have made the wrong mistakes many a day LOL! Many a musician has walked away .. read moreI was framed? oh how I have made the wrong mistakes many a day LOL! Many a musician has walked away from a song befuddled by my drum taps to walk back later and wonder why the keystrokes fit:) A jazz tap bunny playing in a rock and roll band. oh well sometimes we have to go with the flow... Love your mind Dana
Your poem brings to mind how, when looking out at the sea, we are filled with a ton of sensory details, the birds swooping, the salty air tangy, the waves whipping spray, etc. . . . but there's so much more that does NOT meet the senses . . . so much down deep, unseen, but sensed. I get the feeling, in your poem, that the narrator senses there's more depth beyond the ocean scene he's taking in at the moment. Perfect metaphor for life . . . & also for people (((HUGS))) Fondly, Margie
Wow, this is really good...love that last stanza. This is very creative and I enjoyed the imagery.
Posted 9 Months Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
9 Months Ago
Hi choosen nice to meet you:) thanks for the compliment! I have an obsession with waves of all kinds.. read moreHi choosen nice to meet you:) thanks for the compliment! I have an obsession with waves of all kinds:)
9 Months Ago
i love watching ocean waves, it feels like each one has something to say. Some seem joyful some seem.. read morei love watching ocean waves, it feels like each one has something to say. Some seem joyful some seem sad or lonely, or what ever the emotion.
Just as the horizon has no breadth and the pulsing ripples of a lake are endless, our spirits too have no limit. Such realization comes to us at the shoreline's edge! Filling us with the divine knowledge of ourselves and the wonderful things we are capable of. Our limbs though weary feel light again. A very emotional tryst with oneself, dear Bunny. We hum to life's thrum till we can hum no more. Wonderful words!
Posted 9 Months Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
9 Months Ago
I like the idea of being a hum thrum someday:)
9 Months Ago
Oh it will suite you dear Bunny. You're full of music :)
dearest Bunny... it must be lovely to sit by the
Ocean's edge and sway with the motions of the waves as seaweed
dances around Mermaids. I have heard Taps played at two
Military funerals of loved ones. It was the most awesome sound
and I was moved each time to a different realm of existence.
TAPS was written during the American Civil War...
Your poem gives us a personal view of a Jazz musician playing Taps.
gently, Pat
Posted 9 Months Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
9 Months Ago
Deep inside of those taps rings an Immortality Dearest Patricia:)
9 Months Ago
Yes... I agree... and I believe that our Spirit does live on... earthly bound until we hear the soun.. read moreYes... I agree... and I believe that our Spirit does live on... earthly bound until we hear the sound of Taps. Your talent is awesome. truly, Pat
Though it is not mentioned specifically, I must believe the pandemic in some way inspired this haunting offering. The sense transmitted is funereal, "Taps" being the military bugle call played at, among other things, funerals. The speaker is clearly in mourning, but also feeling a sense of helplessness as he looks out over the horizon. I would like to offer words of comfort, but unfortunately, the end is not yet.
Posted 9 Months Ago
9 Months Ago
I am certainly full of sorrow over the waves of sadness I am feeling from so many souls right now
I keep seeing different things when I read this one. It's hard not to (at the moment) lend a sort of plague mindset to everything, so when I first read I made some connections to the current reality, but the more I read, the more it feels like an introspective poem. Almost like a moment taken to examine the entirety of life from birth to death and figure out meaning and place within that timeline.
I studied Montessori history and science with my kids one year, and one of the things they like to focus on with that style of education is the big picture. So, for example, there is this timeline of life where you look at the entire history of life on earth and find that humans have only been a part of history for about one footstep whereas life itself has existed for thousands of miles. We actually drew a timeline that was about eight feet long and only about a quarter inch or less of that space included humans. For some reason, your poem made me think of this. Maybe the sitting by the water aspect and trying to connect to things bigger than the self and find meaning among the chaos. I feel a sense of needed perspective here, and connection to something outside.
As all life is said to have begun in the water, it seems such a natural place to go and meet ourselves and let the natural moods and sounds of those water bodies speak to us about time and meaning in non-words. And somehow we find echoes there that help us to see the world in different ways. Even if just for a moment. I'm not sure if I've just gone down some strange path with this poem, but just thought I'd share what it said to me in the moment. It's a lovely crafting, BB. Love the rhythm which reminds me of the lull of waves and the comfort of water.
Posted 9 Months Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
9 Months Ago
The meter was accidental... but I must admit I was listening to ocean waves when I wrote this:) read moreThe meter was accidental... but I must admit I was listening to ocean waves when I wrote this:)
what you saw in this is nothing less than beautiful and much of it rings strongly to my feelings when I wrote this:) somewhere out there in the vastness of space the first scream you made at birth permeated the birthing room and its wave echoes faintly across the stratosphere coupled with the myriad other ripples till the faintness became a roar and the roar get heard by another and that roar gets echoed by him in a new found collate and that collate get echoed by him and it joins in other voices... ad infinitum
this is rockin my friend and true… gently tho and sooooo darn good .. he just luvs the feel.. never mind he lost an oar... he wants to stay and enjoy the beat... the flow n taps..... :)
Posted 9 Months Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
9 Months Ago
good morning Nev! I feel the waves set in motion from the taps of many a composer from your island .. read moregood morning Nev! I feel the waves set in motion from the taps of many a composer from your island shore my friend:)
again we meet by the shore with its wonderfully meditative way, only you this time with yet another Fedora to adore-a
More times, there should be shorelines to let minds settle while soft waves lap the shores
Enjoy your day
Posted 9 Months Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
9 Months Ago
LOL for a fellow who lives in a landlocked state I sure do ponder the ocean waves a lot:)
the sea can be a very meditative thing, have sat on many a seashore , melting into the sound of the wave and becoming the motion of the tide, did enjoy this one my beach bum friend
Posted 9 Months Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
9 Months Ago
oh how I am craving a day at the shore right now but had to settle for a walk along the allegheny sh.. read moreoh how I am craving a day at the shore right now but had to settle for a walk along the allegheny shore this week:)
Solitude can do that to you. Can bring those emotions to the surface. Rising from the ocean bed to meet the light of day. Let those tears flow and feel the sweet release you can get as a result of letting it all out. Bunny that is a very splendid hat you have on and this is a most poignant write.
Chris
Posted 9 Months Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
9 Months Ago
Hi Chris thanks for stopping by:) some days that's exactly what I do to my drums
I am the Bunny
but the bunny isn't me
long live the bunny
Hello I’m Robert I own an art gallery and performance space in Pittsburgh called The Zenith It is also an antique store and a veget.. more..