Busk - Chapter One

Tina Turner the busking monkey dressed in a sombrero is hiding from a furious main street.

Its a simple gimmick: the monkey dances with symbols and Edward plays the guitar. Yes, the monkey is wearing a tiny sombrero Edward stole from a terribly-cliché tequila bottle in the liquor store, and a poncho he fashioned out of a sock. No, Edward is not Mexican. Yes, he's white as snow. Are you asking the narrator these questions? No, and yes. Its a gig that paid well but was met with division. Pro-monkey, and anti-act. To make matters worse: the only song they've learned how to play is La Bamba

            Edward had traded Tina Turner (the monkey) at a pawn shop for an iPad he had stolen on the bus. Since that day onwards they've made quite the controversial duette. Everybody on the street have had dealings with the pair. Theft. Attacks. Abuse. The authorities have become involved in the past. Somehow, every single time, Edward and his monkey always walkaway Scott-free.

This morning Edward and Tina Turner were busking off the corner of High Street when Gino the barber tried to pat Tina Turner. She in turn bit him then gonged him several times with her tiny symbols, and now they were hiding from a gang of angry street merchants, shop keepers, and the rest of High Street peddlers, and idlers.

Edward was considered by most: a terrible-f**k. Dressing Tina Turner the way he had, exploiting her and getting away with it every day. S**t. People wanted his head. When Tina Turner finally went gorilla on that monkey-patting-barber the street was divided on monkey-prosecution. Animal control was a suggestion. The sports store manager wanted to adopt the monkey. There was the BBQ Store who wanted to turn her into jerky. Things got raucous until finally a leader stepped forward. 'Friends, let us not call the authorities on one of our own,' the woman speaking is Georgia, proprietor of the shoe store, 'I will hunt the pair. I will bring them before the council of High Street and they will stand trial the way we have always done it: High Street Court!'

Here, here's were paid in full. Meanwhile Edward and Tina Turner hid among the crowd. Dressed in their get-a-away outfits: woman carrying baby in harness. Tonight they were planning on sleeping in the dumpster they hid said costume, among others.

            'Come on Tina Turner, lets get out of here.'

            Little did they know they were being followed...

 

Author's Note

Please let me know what you think of the style, and I would be happy to look over any work you might like me to in return.

Reviews

[W. Barrett Munn]

I got a Hunter S. Thompson vibe from your writing style. ( We can’t stop here. This is bat country. ) The characterization is interesting. I would like to see more showing than the telling by the narrator telling.

For example, you can describe Georgia from the protagonist’s POV.( Hiding in the crowd, he heard a woman’s voice,) for example.

Winston

[Dim Gopnik]

Winston, I didn't expect you here. Thanks a lot for taking the time to read all of this. I don't often read long works online so it is very much appreciated. I see what you're saying, and I would like to incorporate this into my edit thanks to your suggestion.

I spent some time sellin' theatre scripts, and I am trying to work the habit of stage directions into the work, while also working it out. So again, thanks a lot. Also that is a very nice compliment, Hunter was a badass, and I'm not even close, but again thanks xxx.

I owe you some

[W. Barrett Munn]

My background is in children’s literature where you write from a single perspective, which means if the protagonist doesn’t hear it,
see it, or reason it out it didn’t happen. You won’t write War and Peace that way but the action stays more current.
Btw, I incorporated your suggestions into my poem. I think it is better.

Winston