Line

Senryu

 

I'm an unused line

caught between your choice of words

erased from your mind

Reviews

[Robert Luna]

This a powerful piece as it caused me to stop and think about things around me and the world as whole. The pure conveying of some thing more than what is merely stated as we see lines as the meaning of everything and nothing. We can see the depth of a souls perspective being unraveled before our very eyes and what truth have we learned to knowing something of the everything that comes together to make each of us whole and as individual parts of a larger picture of the world.


Great Job!!!!!!

[.]

wow ..I love when I have to re read something and this is wonderful..thoughtful reading. lovely writing

[alesuriko]

Very simple and explicitly blunt. Wonderful and compact. Great job.

[Hope]

You are most welcome :)

[Tania Leigh]

Fran Marie, this is excellent....the metaphor is one all of us at the cafe can relate to, for sure, and that last line is killer. Congatulations on your contest win! :-)

[Melanie Jane Boicourt S..]

ooh! I like this a lot.
Thank you for sharing.
Love All, Mejasha

[*~Imperfectly Me~*]

i like this... Great job!

[Helen Woodward]

I don't kknow the first rule of Senryu? But this made sense! Being tossed hanging on fordear life to a piece of elastic. I think you are very clever being able to get the message across with so few words Fran...
Helen :-)

[Pema Dorje]

a lyrical Senryu at that! nicely done, Fran ... enjoyed this