Run Away With Me

Run Away With Me

A Story by Nicholas Duboe
"

This is a short children's story that I wrote for my daughters. It follows a knight looking for a princess and that sometimes you may find what you were looking for wasnt where you thought it'd be.

"

Run Away With Me


Once upon a time, there was a lonely knight walking along a bumpy dirt path.

He thought to himself,"I'm going to find a princess to love and run away with."


And so he began to search.

He searched far,

He searched wide,

He searched low,

and He searched high until he came across a castle.


"A castle!" The Knight yelled, "A princess will surely be there!"

And so he rushed inside.

"Princess! Princess!" The Knight called out,"Run away with me!"

His words echoed off the castle walls.


Suddenly the floor began to shake as a great big dragon came charging around the corner, so the Knight ran quickly away. 

But not before getting a little burned first.

"No princess in there." He thought sadly,"But I will find one, this I swear."


So he began to search again.

He searched far.

He searched wide.

He searched low.

and He searched high until he came across a tower.


"A Tower!" He cried, "A princess will surely be there!"

So he climbed the tower to the tippy top and went in through a window.

"Princess! Princess!" The Knight called out, "Run away with me!"


Suddenly an evil witch appeared in the room, so the knight ran quickly away and climbed back down the tower.

But not before getting a little spell casted on him first.

"No princess in there." He sighed,"But I will find one, this I swear."


So he began to search once more.

He searched far.

He searched wide.

He searched low.

and he searched high but he couldn't find another place a princess would be.


"What do I do?" The Knight thought. "This I haven't the slightest clue."

And so he began to walk home with his head hung low.


He then walked across a bridge that had a beautiful girl with a bag by her side.

The Knight looked so sad so she decided to ask him why.


"A princess." He said with sorrow, "I have not one to run away with me."

The girl looked at her bag. "How sad." She said sorrily.

"I just want one to love and to cherish." The Knight said, "I wish to hold her hand in marriage."


So the girl began to think.

She thought long.

She thought deep.

She thought love.

And She thought steep but then she spoke aloud.


She said "I am a princess." 

The Knight asked "How could this be true?"

She opened her bag and showed him a crown.

And the Knight said,"I've been searching for you."

Then he smiled, getting down on one knee and said to the princess,"Run away with me."


So the Knight and the Princess ran.

They ran fast.

They ran faster.

They ran far.

And lived happily ever after.

The End.

© 2018 Nicholas Duboe


Author's Note

Nicholas Duboe
Hope you liked it! if you have kids read it to them and let me know what they think. I wish I had someone to illustrate this but hey, all in good time!

My Review

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Never had kids so I’m not well versed in writing for children. I believe your repeated lines starting with “He searched far. He searched wide . . .” – this is the kind of thing that’s well-crafted for a child’s attention span, I would think. Like a chorus for a song, the kid would be waiting to hear that fond familiarity which appeals to kids. Your story includes lots of familiar fantasy for kids (princesses, castles, witches) & this should keep things interesting. All in all, a great story!

In one spot it felt like you skipped over a pertinent detail. The Knight ran away from the dragon, but not before getting burned, you write. Before this “burned” line, there is no indication that this is a FIRE-BREATHING dragon, so this “burned” line may not be completely obvious – how did this burn happen? I think you could use some of that fire imagery in your description of the dragon. Other than that, I don’t see anything that interrupts the flow of your storytelling! (((HUGS))) Fondly, Margie


Posted 5 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Nicholas Duboe

5 Years Ago

I really appreciate this comment especially from the standpoint of someone as you said, not as well .. read more



Reviews

Sweet story.
What we go lengths to find,may just be right under our noses...


Posted 5 Years Ago


ahahaha ..nice children's tale for sure ..easy quick good night read ... alas my children are all older than you, young man ;)
your knight gets burned and bewitched along the way ... i would have liked to see how that affected him ... and he find the girl unlooked for sitting on the bridge ... and ran far away .... the ending at first seems anti-climactic but keeping in mind it is meant for children ... i could see myself sparking those little minds to talk about where they =went to live ... if they became farmers ... did they meet the dragon again .... what was the witches spell and how did it affect him ... did it affect her as well????? your story got me thinking and imagining ... what more can a faerie tale ask for ;)
E.

Posted 5 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Nicholas Duboe

5 Years Ago

Thank you very much. Glad you liked it
This one is very simple. But the way you told it, that's what made it so interesting. I loved the repetitions you did there like "She thought long. She thought deep. She thought love..." Surely this will grab any kid's attention.

Posted 5 Years Ago


Nicholas Duboe

5 Years Ago

Thank you very much
A wonderful story shared in the poetry.
So the Knight and the Princess ran.
"They ran fast.
They ran faster.
They ran far.
And lived happily ever after.
The End."
I liked the above lines. Good to be able to run and to escape. Thank you for sharing the amazing poetry.
Coyote

Posted 5 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Nicholas Duboe

5 Years Ago

Thank you very much. For the longest time this story just sat as a draft open on my desktop for my k.. read more
Coyote Poetry

5 Years Ago

A entertaining poem. I like it and you are welcome.
Never had kids so I’m not well versed in writing for children. I believe your repeated lines starting with “He searched far. He searched wide . . .” – this is the kind of thing that’s well-crafted for a child’s attention span, I would think. Like a chorus for a song, the kid would be waiting to hear that fond familiarity which appeals to kids. Your story includes lots of familiar fantasy for kids (princesses, castles, witches) & this should keep things interesting. All in all, a great story!

In one spot it felt like you skipped over a pertinent detail. The Knight ran away from the dragon, but not before getting burned, you write. Before this “burned” line, there is no indication that this is a FIRE-BREATHING dragon, so this “burned” line may not be completely obvious – how did this burn happen? I think you could use some of that fire imagery in your description of the dragon. Other than that, I don’t see anything that interrupts the flow of your storytelling! (((HUGS))) Fondly, Margie


Posted 5 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Nicholas Duboe

5 Years Ago

I really appreciate this comment especially from the standpoint of someone as you said, not as well .. read more

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306 Views
5 Reviews
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Added on May 16, 2018
Last Updated on May 16, 2018
Tags: Story, Children's Book, Kids, Youth, Cute, Romance, Romantic, Funny, Fun

Author

Nicholas Duboe
Nicholas Duboe

Bowie, TX



About
Hello there, my username is a pen name to be honest but I am currently 26 years old. I am a husband, a father and a son. I am also a poet and attempting novelist. I began writing years ago using Books.. more..

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