Hearts Trapped In Failure's Paradox

Hearts Trapped In Failure's Paradox

A Poem by Travis Gibson (poetic heroics)
"

Been holding on to this one, ironically enough.

"
in the ashes
of our broken dreams
we pretend to be friends...
making sand castles

Our naive hearts
hide and seek, flirtatiously
through the burnt debris
of a home we couldn't save

at our fanciest tea parties
exposed, but well-dressed resentments
cordially sip soot from broken cups
ignoring the charred table between them

heated tempers sparked, savagely
a vernal union... burn'd at the stake
it's there, standing in the fire
that we were never more honest

ignoring the omen that smoke gives
gold promises break (in flame's wake),
at the scorched edges of forever
we pretend to be friends...

playing make-believe

© 2018 Travis Gibson (poetic heroics)


Author's Note

Travis Gibson (poetic heroics)
Holding on to want you know is gone, is dangerously counterproductive to the mind, heart, and spirit. Sometimes, letting go is what's best... even if you have to say farewell to a friend. Thank you for reading, your thoughts are welcomed.

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I have a suggestion before i forget the "them" at the end of the third stanza may be more suited with "us". I dont know if that was placed there for tech. reasons but it pushes me outta feeling of you and her into someone else's life. The poem itself is grand...such a hard emotional subject. The living in the same life that is just all a facade now...just motions... It is quite literal for me. We had a house fire about 10yrs ago that destroyed our lives....everything just 'poof' in a life that was already stretched outta shape. It took years of hard work to overcome all the things that fire burn outta us and into us. Thank you for sharing something so personal to you.

Posted 5 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Travis Gibson (poetic heroics)

5 Years Ago

Absolutely, I consider myself a student and I am always open to helpful suggestions.
Gypsy Warrior Queen

5 Years Ago

Always feel you can do the same when you stop by for a read. I am a blam..there it is kinda poet...I.. read more
Travis Gibson (poetic heroics)

5 Years Ago

Will do, and I understand... I don't edit much of my work either. I've been planning to revisit some.. read more


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Reviews

I have a suggestion before i forget the "them" at the end of the third stanza may be more suited with "us". I dont know if that was placed there for tech. reasons but it pushes me outta feeling of you and her into someone else's life. The poem itself is grand...such a hard emotional subject. The living in the same life that is just all a facade now...just motions... It is quite literal for me. We had a house fire about 10yrs ago that destroyed our lives....everything just 'poof' in a life that was already stretched outta shape. It took years of hard work to overcome all the things that fire burn outta us and into us. Thank you for sharing something so personal to you.

Posted 5 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Travis Gibson (poetic heroics)

5 Years Ago

Absolutely, I consider myself a student and I am always open to helpful suggestions.
Gypsy Warrior Queen

5 Years Ago

Always feel you can do the same when you stop by for a read. I am a blam..there it is kinda poet...I.. read more
Travis Gibson (poetic heroics)

5 Years Ago

Will do, and I understand... I don't edit much of my work either. I've been planning to revisit some.. read more
I love the way you use startling descriptions ("sip soot from broken cups" . . . "scorched edges of forever") . . . which pretty much lift your poem into a moon orbit. I'm reminded of so many people who keep fighting it out, rather than making the break. You are so right . . . people do this all the time & you pegged it with palpable futility (((HUGS))) Fondly, Margie

Posted 5 Years Ago


Travis Gibson (poetic heroics)

5 Years Ago

Unfortunately, I wrote this from a position of personal experience. My exwife and I, stayed together.. read more
barleygirl

5 Years Ago

Thank you . . . this is why I haven't been in any longterm relationships in my 62 years . . .
“Cordially sip soot from broken cups.” Love that line. Not being able to move on is a waste of time and energy, sad thing is we know that every step of the way. Your style of writing reminds me of my own. You have great command of language and make original visuals keep one I tested and moving down the page. Great writing!!!

Posted 5 Years Ago


Travis Gibson (poetic heroics)

5 Years Ago

Thank you... given your talent, I'm extremely humbled that you've found any similarities in our work.. read more
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LJW
I see you took the fire theme and ran with it here too, as I did in CRITICAL.
Fire is emotion. A universal all can relate to. Who among us has not been burned to ash? And then who among us has not risen Phoenix-like to seek out the inviting flames again?

Posted 5 Years Ago


Travis Gibson (poetic heroics)

5 Years Ago

Those all too inviting flames... if only they were meant to be tamed.
The images you have created here are powerful and unforgettable. I love your style and the message is one we can all relate to. A keeper for me!

Posted 5 Years Ago


Travis Gibson (poetic heroics)

5 Years Ago

I'm pleased you found my words to be so affecting... your sincerity will also be unforgettable.
Very fond of this imagery you've created of romance trapped in an ambience of decay and destruction. The juxtaposition aides your message beautifully.

Posted 6 Years Ago


Travis Gibson (poetic heroics)

5 Years Ago

Thank you... I'm pleased you enjoyed this and decided to leave the lovely review. I look forward to .. read more
Always let go all the way. you can't rebuild on ashes.you have rebuild again with an all new foundation

Posted 6 Years Ago


Travis Gibson (poetic heroics)

6 Years Ago

A hard lesson I learned in hindsight. Thank you for the gem.
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.
There will be many who agree with your words here, Travis, and just as many who are prepared to do whatever it takes to avoid failure. The stigma of failure is that strong that sometimes it is difficult to give up on what may seem a hopeless cause. It all comes down to the individuals involved. For even a wreck can be salvaged and restored. And sometimes it is impossible and the truth does set you free.

A very important work, Travis. Deeply realistic and very well conceived. Nicely done.

Posted 6 Years Ago


Travis Gibson (poetic heroics)

6 Years Ago

You are absolutely right, my friend. Some things can be salvaged from the wreckage, it takes a consc.. read more
"ignoring the charred table between them

heated tempers sparked, savagely
a vernal union... burn'd at the stake"

I guess relationships have their seasons, their growth and death, their ups and downs so to speak. Hard to impose anything but let things unfold freely. It will hurt us the most or it may hurt others for we are fragile and we need TLC. Amazing poem my friend.

Posted 6 Years Ago


Travis Gibson (poetic heroics)

6 Years Ago

They do have their seasons don't they... even when we want them to last for forever.
Sami Khalil

6 Years Ago

All true. You are welcome.
Somewhere through Your words, I wanted to cry, Your words can apply to more thank one state or situation, like for example aside of Your author's note, I see also a "fake" relationship where two people pretend the smiles to each others while their hearts know the truth.

how hard it must be, how difficult it must be, when the heart says yes, and the mind says no, what an inner battle it must be... thank You my friend, for saying the truth though it hurts, for sharing these profound words with us.

Posted 6 Years Ago


Travis Gibson (poetic heroics)

6 Years Ago

You are right. There are many types of relationships that we must separate ourselves from. It's just.. read more

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623 Views
10 Reviews
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Shelved in 1 Library
Added on March 20, 2018
Last Updated on March 20, 2018
Tags: love, break up, divorce, friendship, hurt, fire

Author

Travis Gibson (poetic heroics)
Travis Gibson (poetic heroics)

Oblivion's edge, OH



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Been here for some time... My work is my life. Read and I hope you enjoy. I will return the sentiment. more..

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