A hundred plus three

A hundred plus three

A Poem by Hana Saemon
"

The relentless journey of you and me

"
That first time
That first line
That explosive bind
An orgasm of minds

Blood pumping
Rushing adrenaline
You got me blushing
With your oh so subtle hints

Furiously exchanging
Passionately conversing
Playfully joking
Secretly loving

That first night
Under those fairy lights
You held me tight
Oh what a sight

Not long after
By the sea we shivered
In the sand I quivered
As you got on your knees and delivered

Then, five days passed
I was handed my first task
Tests if love does truly lasts
Because dawn eventually sees dusk

Crazy initially
Difficult understandably
Gets easier eventually
Nine times since you've lost your memory

But each and every time
You lost and then you find
Those little tell tale signs
That your hands belong in mine

A cliche this might be
A little tiresome probably
I've written a hundred plus three
About the love that is you and me

© 2013 Hana Saemon


Author's Note

Hana Saemon
Had an emotional night, so another 5 minute rant :)

My Review

Would you like to review this Poem?
Login | Register




Featured Review

There is an urgency in your staccato lines....propeling the reading from one thought to the next with ease. Not sure if I am reading you correctly, but it seems that the love of your life might have some medical problems that make memories come and go. Through it all, love survives....it endures...and that is what makes life worth living. Your poetry is always fresh and new and even if you write 200 plus three, you will have people reading and enjoying your work. This was wonderful. Lydi**

Posted 10 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Lydia Shutter

10 Years Ago

Thank you for sharing your story. I wish you and your partner only the best. Lydi**
This comment has been deleted by the poster.
Hana Saemon

10 Years Ago

Thanks lydi! Really appreciate it!



Reviews

A delightful little poem to read, short but great use of words to convey the feeling of the story and I always particular enjoy anything with a streak of fun and lightheartedness running throughout and this has it in abundance !

Quality !

Posted 10 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Hana Saemon

10 Years Ago

Awww thank you for your kind comments! I'm really glad you've enjoyed it! :)
Tom

10 Years Ago

joie de vivre !
There is an urgency in your staccato lines....propeling the reading from one thought to the next with ease. Not sure if I am reading you correctly, but it seems that the love of your life might have some medical problems that make memories come and go. Through it all, love survives....it endures...and that is what makes life worth living. Your poetry is always fresh and new and even if you write 200 plus three, you will have people reading and enjoying your work. This was wonderful. Lydi**

Posted 10 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Lydia Shutter

10 Years Ago

Thank you for sharing your story. I wish you and your partner only the best. Lydi**
This comment has been deleted by the poster.
Hana Saemon

10 Years Ago

Thanks lydi! Really appreciate it!
Very clever... I love the wordplay in this one, and the way that it was written in a somewhat "frenzied" style, which adds to the feeling of an unbridled romance. I also like the way you pose the semi-question "a cliche this might be/a little tiresome probably", because i've felt this way about some of my own work--are people tired of me yet? I don't think so, and I didn't think this was tiresome or cliche at all, it was honest and emotionally charged. Nicely done.

Posted 10 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Hana Saemon

10 Years Ago

thank you sarah! it's always nice to get reviews from great writers such as yourself. im glad u've e.. read more
There's so much about this piece that I like. The quick little lines somehow paint the complete picture of the moment in so few words:

Furiously exchanging
Passionately conversing
Playfully joking
Secretly loving

Those simple phrases invoke a faceless montage of two people doing exactly those things, as part of the overall timeline of the poem, the whole gamut from first encounters to intimate moments to the inevitable trials & tests of love. :)

Posted 10 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Hana Saemon

10 Years Ago

He is fantastic, that boy of mine. I try to capture everything because with his memory loss, im the .. read more
I love the way you paced this! Reading it I began to get breathless.
Then , you slowed it down, and grounded it. Just like life, and love. Fabulous!

Posted 10 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Hana Saemon

10 Years Ago

Awwww thank you for your kind words! Im really glad you've enjoyed this and taken the journey with m.. read more
[send message][befriend] Subscribe
DJ
This is a beautiful rant Hana, a real testament to true love, enduring, overcoming, superseding and rising above and beyond loves four letter restrictions. Another well penned, heartfelt and emotionally charged write.

Posted 10 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Hana Saemon

10 Years Ago

Awww thank u. Im starting think you're biased. Haha. But thank you :)
DJ

10 Years Ago

Haha, no I really do enjoy your work, biased or not.
Hana Saemon

10 Years Ago

Aww thank you. :)

Share This
Email
Facebook
Twitter
Request Read Request
Add to Library My Library
Subscribe Subscribe


Stats

503 Views
6 Reviews
Rating
Added on August 18, 2013
Last Updated on August 18, 2013
Tags: Cancer, love, tumor, tumour

Author

Hana Saemon
Hana Saemon

New Zealand



About
Just a student. Writing is something i do when i need to let out feelings. Inspirations are usually from life events. more..

Writing

Related Writing

People who liked this story also liked..


I Wish I Wish

A Poem by DJ


The Gamble The Gamble

A Poem by DJ


I'll be... I'll be...

A Poem by DJ


Seasons Seasons

A Poem by Hana Saemon