Brown

Brown

A Poem by HappyAccident
"

Broken Hearts blur the lines of sanity

"
Green, Yellow,Orange ,Red
Running Running Running away
Running away from him, life
The lies ,her lies, his lies, their lies
How long did I not know
How long did she know
Did she know about me the life to be
Green, Yellow, Orange, Red
Searching Searching Searching the trees
So heartless that woman cast away the truth
Did she smell my scent .See our picture in your wallet
Did she care. We you not ashamed
D id you tell her I’m your wife or am I just your sister
I saw her number.  Saw your stained collar. Shirts
The shirts I bought...Remember
Green, Yellow, Orange, Red
Finishing Finishing Finishing your burdens
Finishing me, the life to be
No need to shed fake tears, you have her your lie
But no longer me your wife, your child to be

© 2010 HappyAccident


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Featured Review

From page 30 Read Requests

I felt that the way this piece is structured, was very unique. It drew you in and asked permission, to be understood. I hope that it could be re-worked and given the attention it deserves. There are some errors and spacing, miss placed commas and I think polished presentation, is important. Maybe even more so in an experimental piece.

Things such as line 12 [Did she care. {We} you not ashamed] Read this and see that it breaks the rhythme for the reader. As the phrase, has lost its meaning. Losing, its reader. Leaving me to feel the posting, was rushed...

I like the over all feel here, with its hidden elements that require real thought. So please, polish this peice.


Posted 9 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.




Reviews

?

Posted 8 Years Ago


From page 30 Read Requests

I felt that the way this piece is structured, was very unique. It drew you in and asked permission, to be understood. I hope that it could be re-worked and given the attention it deserves. There are some errors and spacing, miss placed commas and I think polished presentation, is important. Maybe even more so in an experimental piece.

Things such as line 12 [Did she care. {We} you not ashamed] Read this and see that it breaks the rhythme for the reader. As the phrase, has lost its meaning. Losing, its reader. Leaving me to feel the posting, was rushed...

I like the over all feel here, with its hidden elements that require real thought. So please, polish this peice.


Posted 9 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Wow, a beautiful and amazing write. Thanks for sharing.

Posted 9 Years Ago


WOW! That was amazing, fabulous write

Posted 9 Years Ago


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that was a smack in the mouth..really powerful stuff..loved it

Posted 9 Years Ago


Made me think.
Very well written!

Posted 9 Years Ago


I got a little lost in the middle of this but it brought me round at the end. It's a decent piece of work, very thought provoking and sad.

Posted 9 Years Ago


Lovely:)

Posted 9 Years Ago


This is a good interesting write. the flow of emotion mingled with thought adds to this piece a sense of longing. You covered sight and hearing, even smell missing the touch. Not really, the piece works as is great job.

Posted 9 Years Ago


I love the repetition of the colors. This is such a good piece that really captured me at first line, and held me all the ay through. Great job!

Posted 9 Years Ago



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Added on September 24, 2010
Last Updated on September 24, 2010

Author

HappyAccident
HappyAccident

Virginia Beach, VA



About
I like to think that I contribute to society in my own special way.I shower daily,deliver witty blog post (when I feel like it) and recycle .You could call me a loner...well because everyone else does.. more..

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