Chapter Twelve

I’m standing in the Room of Light, said to be the brightest room in this place I compare to Hell. It’s empty, the floor consisting of white carpet. However, the walls and ceiling are something else entirely. Windows. Clear, crystal windows. I am caged in by glass, and yet it is beautiful unlike every other room I have come across.

Kyle’s friend told us about it at dinner. She’s been here for over a year and is no closer to leaving, despite her menacing build. I recall her name being Brett, and she had gone on about this room located on the top floor. She said she’d just come from here, since it helps her calm down after a stressful day. She didn’t go on to explain where on the top floor this room was, too busy reminiscing with her long term friend. I decided to find it for myself.

I sit close up to the glass, pressing my palm against it. It’s cold against my skin, and I welcome it.

Beyond, in a world I will never reach, I see buildings. Tall, broken buildings. Silver said it is the remains of a Segment, and I wonder what happened to all the people that had inhabited it. Cars lay toppled, rubble still falls from the many buildings, and some have crumbled to the ground. Did the enemy cause this, or the beings who come from the Sectors? If I asked, my bet would hang on the enemy doing it. Maybe that’s why this Sector was built next door, to remind us what we are up against.

I sigh, my breath fogging the glass for a few seconds. I see a stranger in the reflection, and I croak out a sob when I realise it’s me. I know now that the girl I was in the North Segment is dead, and this is the shell that remains. My eyes are still big and blue, but they lack the sparkle my mother used to adore so much. The life has been drained from them; my eyes are no longer the doorway to my soul because my soul doesn’t exist. Or maybe it does, but the past two weeks have overshadowed it. Either way, I feel like weeping. 

I lie down, wincing ever so slightly until I am comfortable. The sun is going down, taking the light with it, but I do feel calmer. I’m calm enough that beyond the rage and pain I have felt for the past few days, I can feel what is wedging a hole in my chest.

Sadness. Soul consuming sadness.

I’m falling into a pit, and there is no one at the bottom to catch me. From the moment Jake pulled the trigger of a blank gun, I have been alone. Surrounded by people, people suffering as much as me, but alone all the same.

Another sob works its way from my throat, and I close my eyes to sleep.

 

***

 

When I come to, the natural light I fell asleep to has been replaced by artificial light. I force my eyes open, recoiling from the light as I do, and sit up. Outside there is nothing but darkness, the old Segment invisible in the distance. I see my reflection far more clearly, and it sickens me.

I stumble to my feet and stretch, padding over towards the door as I do. The corridor isn’t as brightly lit and I know why. It must be after curfew. Heart in my throat, I rush through the doors and turn right towards the elevators. I pass the two training rooms, dark and unattended to. Why did no one come to find me? I walk faster, my footsteps bouncing from the walls and sounding painfully loud.

I arrive at the elevators, and my stomach sinks. They’re out of order for the night. I look around desperately and continue down the corridor, turning left when I reach the end. My breathing becomes laboured as I begin to panic.

What will happen to me if I’m caught? Will I end up like Tony, barely able to stand on my feet and a face sticky with blood? I keep moving.

I’m met by a flight of stairs and jog down them, using the handle to propel me around and descend the following flight. Just as I make a right turn towards the dorms, voices cause me to halt. They sound a little way down the corridor, hushed but the words still clear.

“... feel it, I can’t stop thinking about it.” someone says in a frantic whisper. “And if Carl finds out, even he gets a whiff of what happened, he’ll... he’ll...” I realise it’s Silver.

“Calm down, will you? Nothing’s going to happen. Just keep that hole in your face shut.” another voice snaps, but the desperation is still there. I don’t recognise it, and I don’t want to know who possesses it. All I know is that it’s male.

“I’m scared.” Silver croaks. I press myself into the wall when I hear their footsteps approach, and I pray to god they don’t head for the stairs. There’s a gap between the railing of the stairs and the wall, and being as skinny as I am, I’m able to squeeze between it and let the shadows conceal me�"or at least hope they do. I hold my breath, my head pounding with panic.

“I know, just don’t let any of them screw things up. They’re too observant; they could ruin everything.” the voice responds. “Go to your room and stay there. Tell Ethan to keep his guard up, and for god’s sake, don’t give anything away to Carl. I’ll deal with the footage of the recruits.”

I hold my breath when they stop at the stairway, and I see the man plant a kiss on Silver’s forehead. He’s two heads taller than her, and she lifts herself on her tiptoes to meet him. He then leaves her, a dark shadow disappearing down the corridor. I plant my hand over my mouth to keep my breathing silent. Silver climbs the stairs, her hand on the railing just inches above my head. If she sees me, she doesn’t show it.

I wait five minutes more before emerging from my hiding place. Creeping to the corner I look down the corridor, my eyes instantly catch sight of a security ball camera. It blinks at me, telling me it’s active in the middle of the corridor on the ceiling. Silver and the mystery man had been walking while talking, so to whoever watches behind that camera the scene would have looked innocent. They mustn’t pick up sound, or they would be pretty stupid to talk about something so secretive.

I listen intently. I can hear it moving, its electrical sound familiar in my ears. My old school had the same camera, but they weren’t as updated as this one I see now. I hope that the cameras are only on this floor, the floor where the dorms are, because I didn’t see any on my way down here. No, there couldn't have been, I would have been caught by now.

The camera turns away, and I move. It stops after a forty five degree turn and I stand directly below it, waiting for it to turn again. Once it turns a further ninety degrees, my movements following it carefully, I run down the corridor until I reach my dorm room. I practically throw myself inside, blindly seeking my bed.

I forgot about the camera in here, and as I fumble with my bed sheets, I can only pray it hasn’t been activated, and if it has then the watcher will dismiss it. 

I doubt they will, and I find I am unable to sleep.

 

 

***

 

I manage to fall asleep for an hour until the lights of the dorm switch on, waking me from something incredibly restless. I managed to get my boots off without the others hearing, I didn’t see the point in getting changed into some nightwear, though.

Tilly groans herself awake, rubbing her eyes. I pretend I have only just got dressed, slipping my boots on and forcing a yawn. It turns into a real one when my eyes water.

“You’re up early.” she observes, running a hand through her messy red hair.

“Yep.” I say curtly, focussing my attention on my feet.

“You okay?”

“Never better.” I stand, grab my pillow, and hurl it above my head and at the upper bunk. It hits something, and when Cole growls I know I hit him in the face.

“Any need?” he says groggily. I hit him again. “Ah!” he grabs it and throws it back at me, looking annoyed. His hair sticks out at all angles, making him look so ridiculous I burst out laughing. He makes a face of amusement, but it’s plastered with sarcasm.

Tilly skips to the bathroom, shooting me a look as she does. I’m annoyed that she didn’t come and find me, or any of the others for that matter. I have already got my own back on Cole, since he isn’t a happy riser. DJ shouldn’t expect any help from me today. I don’t normally hold a grudge, but if I’d been caught last night I would have gotten a striking like no other�"I’m not even out of the danger zone yet! The camera in this room could be my undoing!

While the others get ready, I do everything I can to distract myself from the brief conversation I heard last night. I rearrange my clothes, I wash my face several times, I rearrange the beanbags to a corner rather than the middle of the room.

“Since when are you a spring cleaner?” Cole asks, frowning from his place on the bed above me. I don’t respond and instead toss a beanbag at him. He ducks and it hits the wall before flopping onto his mattress. I turn my back on him before I can witness his glare.

I’ll deal with the footage of the recruits. I stop and close my eyes. What footage? How’s he going to deal with it? They’re too observant; they could ruin everything. Who are? Us?

“Come on, grumpy arse.” Tilly scowls, and I follow her and the others into the corridor. Naturally I eye the camera when we pass under it, my heart fluttering with nerves.

We file into the dining hall five minutes later and join the rest of our group, which Jay is now a part of. Not feeling hungry I sit beside her instantly, mussing her hair in greeting. She giggles.

“Any trouble from d********g Tony?” Mike asks when he sits down. Jay shakes her head. Her jaw still looks sore, but there is no sign of redness, only blue and purple. I presume that’s good. I poke her in the ribs when she loses her smile, which only returns when she pokes me back.

“Where did you disappear to last night?” Kyle asks, raising a brow at me. As soon as he says it, Cole, Tilly and DJ stiffen and realization crosses their expressions.

“Crap, Harper, it never crossed our minds!” Tilly says, her hand over her mouth. “We were going to stay up and wait for you, but curfew came early... we thought you’d be okay!”

“Keep your voice down.” I snap. “No one caught me, or at least I don’t think they did.”  They all look at me, and I sigh. “Don’t do it again, promise me that much.”

“Done.” Cole says, the other two nodding.

“You look stressed.” Max says after a moment. “Did something happen?” Yes, I heard something I had no right to listen to, I think, but I shake my head.

Kyle and Mike must sense something off, because for the next fifteen minutes they crack jokes until my stomach hurts from laughing. We shouldn’t be laughing, that’s not what we’re here for, but I can’t help it any more than they can. Tears stream down Max’s face, Jay unable to breathe, and the jokers look satisfied with their comic relief. I’m grateful, too; I needed a laugh to ease up the nagging twist in my lower gut.

When we get up, people look at us like we’re insane. Hardly anyone laughs here, I’ve noticed that over the past few days. I don’t blame them, really. We laugh when mocking one another or taunting one another, but over silly things it seems unheard of. Everyone ignores the lingering eyes, so I do, too.

We return to our dorms where, like yesterday, we are called out one by one for the intelligence transmission. Today I am the last to be called from our dorm, and I take my time in walking towards the  room on the upper floor. I take the stairs, my footsteps echoing back at me, and walk the long way to the room.

Ten minutes later I am met by Ethan at the door, checking his watch.

“You’re late.” he says flatly.

“Good.” I walk past him and walk into the room. Taylor smiles in greeting, sitting on the table with a mug in her hands. Chocolate hits my nose in a mouth-watering haze. I look at the table and see that the leather bounds have been dismembered from it, and instantly my chest feels lighter.

“No binding today.” she says, nodding to confirm my thoughts. “Is everything alright? You look a little nervous, dear.”

“Don’t talk to me like you care.” I snap. She smiles.

“Why not? I’m only being nice.” She shrugs. My blood tingles with anger.

“You people aren’t nice. You’re the opposite, actually. You don’t care about us, we’re tools to you, not people.” I snarl, involuntarily edging backwards towards the door. She watches me, cocking her head with curiosity.

“We have a listener,” she says. “that’s always a good thing.”

“I don’t need to listen to know the truth.” She ignores this and taps on the table, indicating that I sit. I do, seeing no other choice, and she shifts once I do.

The following half hour or so consists of question after question, testing my eyesight, my basic maths, English, science, and common sense. I get bored after a while, sighing as I prop my fist on my knee and answer her questions.

She smiles when she listens to my final answer. She smiles a lot. “Am I boring you?”

“Yes, immensely.” I answer, yawning.

“Don’t worry, this session along with the other transmissions will become more interesting. We’re just getting a sense of who you are. You’ll soon be in groups to observe one another as well as yourselves. That way we can use up the set time period more appropriately.”

“Yay.” I say, stretching out the word for added sarcasm. She just smiles, and I realise it’s beginning to get on my nerves.

“You smile an awful lot.” I say, staring at her intently.

“Have a guess why.” she challenges, but her voice is pleasant enough. I make a thoughtful sound as I mull it over.

“You want to keep your true emotions under wraps?” I suggest, shrugging.

“Dig deeper.” she urges, and in my head I think, She’s testing you.

As Max previously pointed out, I’m an observer. I watch people and the things they do in order to get a good read on them. I’ve done it my entire life without even thinking about it, and I spent the majority of my childhood getting a scolding for staring. I don’t know what it is, but I feel safer if I know how to read people. Taylor seems easy enough.

“You like to manipulate people, get them thinking you’re... nice, as you thought of yourself earlier. It gains people’s trust, so when you attack them they don’t see it coming. You hide your true emotion for your own benefit and others’ downfall.” I wish I could add to it, but I daren’t. I think her father throwing knives at her scarred her on some level. After all, her fear is of her own profession. Her father must have pushed her to her limit, so much so she feels the need to hide her emotions through kindness. Better yet, her father probably used the same technique while constantly threatening her life.

She looks at me, her smile gone, and she must know I have dug even deeper but refuse to share. “You’re a clever one, aren’t you?” she says.

“Not clever,” I shake my head. “Just attentive.”

They’re too observant; they could ruin everything.

Stop watching others and focus on yourself, you won’t get into trouble that way.

You’ve observed everything like a watch dog for as long as I can remember.

“I see.” She’s not smiling anymore, and I somehow feel giddy. “You can go now.”

I get up with a skip in my step, but stop short at the door. Ethan stares at me, his eyes somewhat glistening. They look like green gems, I realise. They follow me as I step outside in the corridor, the door clicking shut at me heel, and I feel like he’s decoding me just through his stare. I may be able to read people, but I’m no good at keeping myself under wraps.

Then it occurs to me. I can’t read half of the people in this place. Not Ethan or Silver or Perry, not Carl, not Tilly or DJ, hardly even Kyle or Mike. Jay I can get small glimpses of, and Max and Cole I’ve known for the majority of my life, but the others? Reading people is what makes me shine, so living in a world where everyone had a box shielding the contents has me at a low. Honestly, it scares me. The only reason I can read Taylor is because she gave an insight to her past. I know nothing about the others.

“What?” I ask, frowning at Ethan before me. He looks me up and down, doing a calculation of his own. I wonder if I am as blank to him as he is to me. “Come on, spit it out!”

“Watch your tone, Harper.” he warns, stepping closer. “I don’t deal with disrespect kindly.”

“Why don’t you make me pay for my wrong doings, then, whatever they might be?” I challenge, raising my brow.

“I would, believe me when I say I’ve done it before, so don’t tempt me.” he says, his voice deathly low, and I shiver. “I already have you dangling by a thread.”

“How so?”

“You didn’t go completely unseen last night.” he smirks a little, but it lacks the usual trace of teasing. “If you’re not careful, such information could land into the wrong hands.”

Somehow, his threat doesn’t hit a nerve. I had already prepared myself for the possibility that I’d been seen, so the idea that Ethan saw me doesn’t seem to get under my skin. I know one thing; he doesn’t seem to carry out his threats, they’re just a layer to his thick skin.

I lean close, and a smirk plasters my own lips. “You know what? I dare you.”

I turn my back, and his hand launches towards my arm. He grabs it and clenches, hard enough that I grit my teeth, and the blaze in his gaze is evident. But something in his mind snaps, and he lets go.

“Get out of my face.” he snarls. I smiles and walk away, ignoring the fact that Taylor had watched the entire exchange with a look of malice inside the room.