Chapter 2: Test of Wits

As the seconds ticked down, Sairek gripped the talon of his necklace left by his deceased mother. Praying to her for this demonstration to be easy on him...

Sairek let out an exhausted sigh, grabbing the tail end of his red cape to wipe sweat off of his forehead. It was blazing hot, and the fact the sun shone down on him was not helping. Laure walked beside him, but she did not seem to notice the child dirtying his own clothing like that. Sairek held his staff in one hand, using it as a walking stick. They were leaving the castle which was seated on top of a spiraling trail that led downwards and directly into the village below.

Sairek surveyed the town, and let out another sigh. People were already organized down below, waiting for them -- for him.

A wave of helplessness washed over him. He only now realized how badly he didn’t want to do this little performance. Of course, it was too late to back out now. Sairek lifted his staff and gripped it tightly with two hands in nervousness. He looked like a shy little child now, although that wasn’t too far from what he was feeling.

When the group of soldiers and him got down to village level, all of the villagers knelt down before him. He felt his cheeks blush a little in embarrassment. He didn’t like the fact he was treated above anyone else. He gripped the staff with his two hands tighter. He had to surpress the shaking of his body.

 

“Please, all rise.” He commanded them. All at once, all the villagers rose up to their knees, making him feel a little bit comfortable. He closed his eyes, rapidly thinking for a moment on what he should say next. Despite the fact he hated being the center of attention like this, he was a very quick thinker, just as Laure stated. He acted far more intelligent then someone his own age should have been. He opened his eyes, his next line thought out in only seconds.


“I assume you are all gathered here today to see the fruits of my studies in pursuit of following my father’s profession as a magician,” Sairek commented. “And today I’ve come out of the castle to reveal the answer’s to anyones curiosity to how my studies are going..."

 

"While I disagree any magic I own can be useful for combat as of yet..." He added that last bit in an almost sour tone. "...I am doing this as a test of my own wit to see how creative I am in using my weak magical abilities to somehow aid me in combat. This will also be my first combat experience."

 

"The goal of this exercise is to help me further into my studies and dream..." He almost said that line sourly as well; he didn't want to be a combat magician at all. "...It is also to help aid me in my experience for the future. Nobody in this exercise shall be injured lethally in any way.”

"Or... at least that's how it's supposed to go..." He thought to himself.


Sairek let out a breath. He spoke more then he imagined he would; he commonly made that mistake in public speaking. He resumed once again though. “I trust you all have organized together and have chosen a volunteer for me?” He asked the public.

A villager stepped out of the crowd. He was bigger and more muscular then normal; the local blacksmith of the village. “Aye, we have master apprentice.”

Sairek blinked. “…Who have you chosen then?”

“Yer’ staring at ‘im. Blacksmith Foar”

“You?” Sairek asked out loud calmly.
“YOU!?” Sairek thought in panic inside of his head. The man was almost double his size as far as height and perhaps overall mass.

“Aye, master! The village was curious to see two things: The first was to see which one could win: Brute strength or clever wit. And the second was to see if size truly does matter!”


“...I am so dead.” Sairek thought out to himself hopelessly. Fighting the dread that wanted to surface onto his face. Still, he hid his emotions behind his mask of royalty; He nodded in approval. “Alright, a good test this will be truly!"

 

"...Not..." He added sarcastically at the end of the statement in his head.

 

"Everyone, please step away to make room for us two. At least twenty paces back if you would all please.”


Sairek gulped as the people stepped back, making room for the two to battle. Sairek looked around quickly with his eyes, not turning his head; it would make him look confused.

 

“This shall be the rules: If you manage to pin me down for longer then ten seconds, then the victory goes to you. If I manage to knock you down in any possible way, then the victory goes to me, understand, that in any event, if either of us get put in a position that would normally require the other to bed for mercy, either of us can gain victory from that method as well. Do you accept this?”

“Aye, master! Luck be wit ya laddie.”

“I’m going to need it…” Sairek thought to himself bitterly. It was a good thing his pants were somewhat baggy and the wind was blowing the cloth of them here and there. For, despite the harsh heat of the day, his legs were trembling badly. The pants and wind hid that.

Someone began counting down from 3. Once the count hit 0, Foar ran at Sairek. Sairek nearly hesitated at seeing such a large figure rushing at him. Fear gripped him as he approached, Sairek managed to lift up his staff, pointing it at the man’s eyes. “Wuaie…!” he chanted out and the wind began to blow harder. However, it seemed to be nothing more then a strong gust that blew. With the man’s giant mass, it did slow him down a little to fight against the wind. Not enough to really help Sairek's position in any possible way.

Sairek’s clothing flapped madly. He soon pointed his staff upwards. “Waert!” He chanted out. Soon from the tip of his staff, a blast of water gushed out upwards, spreading in the air as it was taken by the wind's force. Now it was like it was raining, however, it was only drenching Foar, as the wind was blowing to him, and the water was coming from Sairek’s side, meaning he wasn’t getting drenched. Foar covered his face from the water, and soon began slipping on the grass from it being wet, but he caught himself in time.

“Woah woah! Nice try there master! It’s not gonna work though!” he boasted.

Sairek gritted his teeth. He thought of that plan all morning and on the way to here from the castle. It probably would have succeeded if the villagers had picked someone else who wasn’t so heavy. Sairek soon extinguished the water spraying and lowered his staff back down. Unlike the wind, it required his staff as an aiming catalyst. He couldn’t cast any other spells if that one was in use.

Feeling a lack of mana, or Ethereal as he had researched, he moved to position himself elsewhere a bit further away from the blacksmith who was getting closer. He spun himself around and began chanting again. “Balinzer!” He let out. A warm blast of hit air pointed at the grass, he was pleased when a heavy cloud of steam began rising up, hiding his presence. He quickly moved out of his position.

“Bahahah! Clever again master! But I’ll catch ya sooner or late--“


“Ethirul!”







Faor nearly lost his balance again as the ground he was on began shifting a bit. The flat ground soon becoming more uphill, the grass was still slippery and it made him have to whirl his arms around to try and keep his balance. From behind him, he heard Sairek yell out, as the child charged towards him from behind him. Using the slippery grass, Sairek bent down, sliding on it, he laid on his back, not caring if he got his noble clothing soaked or stained for now. He slid, holding out his staff with one hand, sliding under the blacksmith, and both sides of the staff bunted the back of the man’s legs. Sairek knew he succeeded as he continued to slide on through with little interruption. Had he failed, the staff hitting the man would have stopped him. To reassure himself he succeeded, he confirmed it with the giant thud and “oof!” that escaped the man. Sairek grinned, the crowd applauded at him. He somehow managed to do it! He won! He turned around to face the man and soon gasped.

The crowd wasn’t applauding at him, they were applauding that Faor caught himself. He fell down, yes, but he wasn’t on the ground. He caught himself with both hands behind him. Even Sairek knew that a fall would be there he wad flat on his back or his stomach in an unwilling event of his opponent.

 

“Phew, that was close!” The blacksmith let out. Quickly repositioning himself so that he was standing on two legs once again.

By now, Sairek had exhausted all of his plans to attempt and knock his opponent down. Although he wasn’t afraid anymore of not putting a decent display of wit; he was sure he accomplished that much despite his doubts, he had no idea how to knock this man off of his two legs again without doing the same trick twice, which he was sure wouldn’t work.

He yelped as the blacksmith began rushing towards him, reaching out to grab him, Sairek panicked, and held out his staff, quickly chanting the magical word “Ethirul!” to once again make a bump in the ground to mess up the man’s sprinting. He made the hill as tall as the spell would allow him to raise with his magical willpower, before Sairek even realized it, the man slipped off the ground as he would have slid off of a ramp. Sairek panicked as the man was now flying right towards him. He quickly pointed down, planning to blast water out of harm’s way. “Wae--”

There was no mana left in the area. The spell could not be cast. He used up too much in his position by boosting the power of Ethirul.

Sairek braced himself as he soon felt the man collide into him, sweeping him off of his feet, he grunted as he crashed into the ground, accidentally losing the grip on his staff. He slid to a stop in the slippery grass. Sairek quickly as possible began to push himself up, and half stumbled and sprinted towards his staff. He almost reached it before he was tackled down to the ground, and felt his body being pinned against the floor. He grunted out, trying to break free of the hold, but he knew his childish body was no match for that of a hard working blacksmith.

He was annoyed, he could probably do something to get out of this situation if he could grab his staff that was only inches out of reach, alas, before he could think of anything to wiggle his way out of this situation, ten seconds had already passed. The winner was announced, and Sairek mentally scolded himself harshly for being so foolish as to let go of the staff in the first place.


".....How useless can I turn out to be...?" He thought to himself bitterly. "I can't even combat an unarmed blacksmith and win by simply knocking him off of his two feet, without being captured like a run-away cat! I'm... I'm so useless! The first major rule of combat for a magician is to never lose the staff no matter what! ...How could I possibly ever become a great magician if I've done nothing more then fail every goal set by others and by myself?!"

Author's Note

There's probably still a few more typos considering I don't have the luxury of a spell checker or grammar checker.

Reviews

[Sairek Ceareste]

@Chris

- I put moved, because he isn't sprinting or running anywhere. It's more like a few steps backwards. I suppose of course, I should say he is moving only a few steps backwards though.

- Yes, I mean hot, not hit. XD

- Trust me, in some scenario's at school, I had plenty of moments when having to play soccer, where I wouldn't even be running hard, and I would slide -several- feet by accident, crash on the ground, and still be going on a flat field. It depends on the density of how many blades of grass there are. Aside from that, Sairek is smaller then I ever was at that time, so it's very possible.

[Chris]

I don't know why, but, for some reason, your writing seems better here than in F&D. The sentences flow pretty nicely for the most part, and there's some good description here and there. Story-wise, I found nothing wrong with this chapter. It was good, although I think I pretty much told you that when I read the original draft. There are, however, a few technical things I want to point out, not so much grammar mistakes as wording and typos.

When the group of soldiers and him got down to village level, all of the villagers knelt down before him. He felt his cheeks blush a little in embarrassment.

Two things here. First, it should be "When the group of soldiers and he," not "and him." Think about this structure without "the group of soldiers and." With how you have it in the passage, it would read "When him got down." Looking at it this way makes it clear that "him" is the wrong pronoun to use.
Now, a writer's job is (generally) to show, not tell. In the second sentence, you showed by describing how Sairek is blushing, but you also told by stating that he was embarrassed. In most cases, blushing is a sign that someone is embarrassed, so there's really no need to tell us that he's embarrassed. The reader should be able to figure it out for themselves, and if not, well, that's probably more their problem than yours, lol.

Sairek commented. “And today I’ve come out of the castle to reveal the answer’s to anyones curiosity to how my studies are going..."
"While I disagree any magic I own can be useful for combat as of yet..." He added that last bit in an almost sour tone.

There's a certain grammar rule to follow when someone continues speaking in a new paragraph like this. For the last line in the first paragraph, omit the quotation mark. There's one other place you did this in, too. I think it was after the second paragraph I quoted above.

"The goal of this exercise is to help me further into my studies and dream..."

Wouldn't it be better as "in" rather than "into"?

“Wuaie…!” he chanted out and the wind began to blow harder. However, it seemed to be nothing more then a strong gust that blew.

Two things here. First, no need for the "out" after "chanted." The preposition doesn't really seem to serve any purpose, except make that part of the sentence read kind of awkwardly. There are other places where you did this with different words, like "yelled out" and "grunted out." I would also bring up your use of "let out" being awkward, but I think I already mentioned this once to you and you didn't listen, so I won't bother. Second, you can omit "that blew" in the second sentence. We know the wind is blowing, so that extra description isn't needed, and the sentence would be crisper without it.

Feeling a lack of mana, or Ethereal as he had researched, he moved to position himself elsewhere a bit further away from the blacksmith who was getting closer.

I think you can omit "elsewhere." "[A] bit further away" already implies that he's moving elsewhere, so there's no reason for that word. Or you could omit "a bit further away," but that's more descriptive than "elsewhere," so it wouldn't be wise to do so.
Also, maybe you could use a more descriptive word than "moved"? "Moved" is vague and could possibly imply a number of things. For all I know, he could have ran, he could have walked, he could have skipped, and maybe he could have danced to his new position.

A warm blast of hit air pointed at the grass, he was pleased when a heavy cloud of steam began rising up, hiding his presence. He quickly moved out of his position.

You meant "hot" instead of "hit," right? And like with the last passage I quoted, can you use a more descriptive verb than "moved"? Actually, you could shorten "quickly moved" by using "ran" or "sprinted," depending on how fast you want him to go, and maybe depending on how desperate he is to get away, too.

Using the slippery grass, Sairek bent down, sliding on it, he laid on his back, not caring if he got his noble clothing soaked or stained for now. He slid, holding out his staff with one hand, sliding under the blacksmith, and both sides of the staff bunted the back of the man’s legs. Sairek knew he succeeded as he continued to slide on through with little interruption.

There are a lot of "slid"s/"sliding"s/"slide"s in this passage. Try to change some of them up or omit them, particularly where you began with "He slid." The reader should know he's sliding because that was already mentioned in the sentence before it. And would wet grass really be slippery enough to slide like that? I mean, I could be wrong, and I might be overestimating the distance Sairek is sliding, but I thought I would just throw it out there anyway.

Sairek grinned, the crowd applauded at him.

Omit "at." The sentence is just fine without that preposition. The same goes for where you wrote "applauding at" in the paragraph following this one. Also, maybe you could show Sairek being more ecstatic about his supposed victory? I get a sense of his joy in the two sentences following this one, but I want to see it more in Sairek, if that makes sense? Yes, he grinned, but better showing this brief moment of celebration could help the reader feel his excitement more, thus encouraging us to join him in this celebration before we find out that's not why the crowd is applauding. That way we can share in his disappointment, too. Of course, this isn't really necessary, but it might be a nice touch for this part of the story.

Even Sairek knew that a fall would be there he wad flat on his back or his stomach in an unwilling event of his opponent.

This sentence confused me. I was lost at "there he."

Okay, that's it. Other than that, good stuff, yo. :D